Would you help?Please............?

Question

I have a huge problem with my fiance.We argued constantly about stuff and yeasterday it was the pick.HE yelled at me and I called him uneducated.Then hit me in my head, and I stood up and started to punch him.He was like :what the he.. is your problem.I started to cry and he got so much angree that said to me:get out of my house, go to your mother, I'm not your husband anymore and here's your ring.I did nothing just laid and cried while he was out, but went back home quickly. This morning I noticed that he didn't sleep at all, he was up all night. I know that he can't sleep when he's nervoous.Want can I do.I was angry that I had terrible week at office, many changes had happened, my father is so much nervous (I'm worried about his health) and he just plays on computer and shouts at me like it is my fault that his game isn't workig.But i didn't have to bit him.I know it's aweful, but help me stright things up.My fiance isn't somebody who forgets things.he isn't putting the ring back????

i think the rason he is angry is that I'm employeed and he is not.He lost his father 2 years ago and we both live with his mom, who can be tough(we argue and she just say his name and that's it, she doesn't give him advices like my mom does.I'm succesful and he has to ask money from me.He had a little problem with gambling.Than we renewed our apartment fro 3 months(u can't emagine the problems we've passed, argued constantly about the workers )

P.S. He just hit me with his hand in my back of the head.I don't know the english word fro that:( But he sure did not expected me to explode

Answer 1

Well , do you argue always? It so suspicious that he so angry with a very simple reason ha. this time try to listen if he comes to you and try to talk and ask him why did do that to you and make sure that it won't happen again okey .
2nd thing never show that your hopeless if he got mad ,remind him that never do that again , Be strong !
You know falling inlove you should be ready in everything it did happen to me about hitting a bit yeah taht is okey but returning the ring that is painful for you but don't worry u shouldn't show that u r worried coz you don't deserve to be hurt ,rember that always.

Answer 2

People have arguments and disagreements, this is a very normal part of a relationship. However, couples need to learn to have open communication when things are bothering each other. Rather than holding everything in, until the point comes when it all erupts. This is what seems to have happened. There is a key element to keep in mind when arguing, " a spoken word can never be taken back" So, it is so important, not to say things just to be hurtful. This has already been done and nothing you can do to get it back. However, it sounds as though the two of you need to sit down and have a heart to heart. And you need to learn to keep your hands to yourself, it is never ok, no matter how angry you are to hit someone. If this is an ongoing issue you have perhaps you would want to consider some anger management classes to educate yourself on better ways to deal with anger. Both of you need to learn the art of communication, a key element in any relationship, and if the two of you are planning on marriage. Communication is something that will carry you through the rest of your lives. Give him some time before you approach him and then try to apologize, be sincere and honest. Do not point out what he did that was wrong, only accept responsibility of your behaviors. He needs to accept his. I wish you luck, God bless****

Answer 3

This sounds like a fight you can recover from. A marriage is about dealing with stuff like you describe. You need to sit down with him over a cup of coffee-away from the house and talk about everything. Do this at least weekly to keep the air clear between you. Money problems go with the territory. Hang in there and keep talking. Apologize when you are wrong. Try not to go to bed angry at each other. Tell each other you love one another often. Even if you are poor and living with relatives this is doable. Good luck.

Answer 4

Having a marriage problem can be agonizing especially if you're trying to do all you can to make your marriage work. Depending on how your marriage was prior to thinking that you had a marriage problem, you could be in for a hurtful time if you don't take a step back and look at your marriage problem from a "helicopter" viewpoint. To do that, you're going to need to try to limit your emotional stake in the situation which admittedly is a difficult thing to do.

The first step in getting over a marriage problem is to remember that you aren't alone, lots of couples have marriage problems that stem from all kinds of different types of behavior.

Here's a partial list of marriage problems that you may or may not be experiencing:

Marriage problem #1:

Lack of sexual intimacy - a serious issue that you must work through in my opinion if your going to work it out.

Marriage problem #2:

Exploding during an argument, getting too emotional and letting your temper get the best of you - you need to learn to work together and you can't do that if one of you is getting too heated.

Marriage problem #3:

Being selfish - eventually this will catch up to you. You should always think of your partner when you think of yourself.

Marriage problem #4:

Being dishonest - another serious issue. If you cannot be 100% honest and open with your mate, you're marriage is most likely doomed or at the very least unhappy.

Marriage problem #5:

Teasing too much - generally the husband does this but it could go either way. If there's a little bit of truth to the teasing or there's a greater marriage problem that incites the teasing, you could be in for a long road to recovery together. Chances are that you'll have a lot more work to do to correct this marriage problem.

Marriage problem #6:

Not respecting your spouse - this marriage problem can result in all types of other problems. If you are experiencing this you must get to the root of this and figure out why the disrespect is present. If you aren't getting the every day respect that you deserve, make it a priority to not let this go on another day.

Marriage problem #7:

Not being attentive to your spouse or not listening to your spouse - men are usually guilty of this marriage problem but is isn't exclusive to the weaker gender by any means. Really listening doesn't mean obeying, it means understanding what's important to your spouse and acting accordingly.

Obviously there are many other things that could be labeled a "marriage problem", you have to decide what those are as they pertain to your situation.

So, how do you figure out if a marriage problem or problems are severe enough to warrant a divorce?

You should first examine what your marriage problem actually is and decide if it is exclusively a problem for you or if it is something that you both consider to be a marriage problem. If you are the only one who sees the said action as a marriage problem, you have to decide whether or not that specific marriage problem is being caused by you or whether it is truly a problem brought on by your spouse. If the marriage problem is unique to you, seek some help from a counselor and do yourself the courtesy of trying to correct the problem before you believe that you need to run right out and get a divorce. You'll be a better person for it because you will have fixed something within yourself.

However, if you truly believe that the marriage problem is caused and prolonged by your spouse, sit down with yourself first and examine what you believe to be the root cause of the behavior that creates the marriage problem. Make sure that you are being logical when you identify the behavior that you feel is causing the marriage problem and try to recall if the traits or behavior that you've identified in your spouse are 'fixable' in your mind...assuming of course, that your spouse will agree that you are right.

Next, approach your spouse with the information that you've reflected on and try to talk through the cause of the marriage problem. Hopefully your spouse will be open to constructive discussion regarding the marriage problem so you can work through it together. If you cannot do work on the marriage problem together, seek the help of a mediator or marriage counselor so you can actually talk out the marriage problem logically. If you cannot work it out after counseling, other divorce advice, deep self-reflection and discussions, you should be able to decide whether or not the marriage problem warrants a divorce or not.

Of course, no one can decide this but you.

Answer 5

He hit you, leave him. There is no reason why a man should be raising his hand to his wife. You only hit him because he hit you first. If a man hit me, even if it were my husband, believe me, I would hit him back. Your husband should respect you!! If you dont leave him now, he will end up hitting you again. No matter what problems your having with your husband, physical abuse should never be used. Me and my husband fight about money too, and there are times when we scream to the top of our lungs to each other, but he has NEVER hit me at all. Let him get away with it and he will end up doing it agiain. Men like these end up bringing you down. He should be happy for you that you are successful. Instead of loafing on your success, he should encourage you to expand your horizens. Leave him.

Answer 6

Okay, I'm sorry if your Dad is sick from your breakup, but this guy hit you in the head and you're not even married. You talk about it like it's no big deal. It's a huge deal! Are you going to bring kids into this abusive relationship? You're lucky you're not married yet it gives you a chance to move w/out getting a divorce, and most importantly before he really hurts you or worse. Ditch this little man.
BTW what's the pick, are you talking about a nose pick?

Answer 7

Your fiance' is just upset due to him not having a job and he is taking his frustration out on you....No matter what, he is not suppose to hit you....

It does not seem as if he appreciates you anymore....You need to get out on your own and give yourself some space as you to do not have any privacy or space.....

Take a break from him and just find you a place and just do you(JUST TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF) and if he wants to be with you, then he will come to his senses and come to you....

Never let a man hit you, it can lead to a great deal of violence when a man has anger in himself.

Answer 8

Sorry to say but..you need to leave him..especially if he's hitting you or you're hitting him. Your life is way more important than trying to patch things up with your fiance' if he's going to act like that.

Answer 9

No Excuse for Abuse!

Doesn't matter if it's on you or by you! It's time to leave and move on. It will be better for the both of you in the long run.

Answer 10

it sounds to me like this relationship is over. fighting all the time is no way to have a relationship. that is not what a loving relationship is about. Move on this is over...especially if there is physical violance involved.