I am scared to death....But I feel completely helpless PLEASE help!?

Question

Can someone give some information about head injures, if someone could come out of it if they have a traumatic head injury? Yesterday on his way home from work my dad was in a car accident. He's in critical condition with head and internal injuries. A truck slid into his car on the ice head on.The doctors said that hes not brain dead but he still will not wake up. I've been crying all day. Im so scared, I made myself sick from crying and being scared. I can't go see my dad. My mom and even the doctors told me I have to go see him but I can't make myself do it. To make it worse there are things I need to tell him. I can't remember the last time I said I loved him or hugged him. He tells me he loves me every day and tries to make me hug him but I always push him away. I was talking to one of his nurses and she told me that touch is very important. But I can't make myself do it. Maybe Im scared he'll hear me or feel me. I dont know it just freaks me out!!! Could someone PLEASE reply!Thx!

This morning I went in to see him, and I held his hand. I coulnd't bring myself to anything for a long time but i finally said "I LOVE YOU" and I begged him to come back to me. And I kissed his cheek and I kept holding his hand for a sign and after I said I LOVE YOU for about the 3rd time I could feel his hand move and it wasn't just a little twitch but it felt like he SQUEEZED my hand. I was so excited that I ran and got my mom. My mom has been so upset and scared and crying and she was so excited too. The doctors told us just a little while ago that his brained is swelled, and it will take awhile for it to go down. I was really freaked out because it really doesn't look my dad laying there. They can't tell about any permanent damages yet. Im so excited! Thanks everyone for the advice and kind words..i will keep everyione posted.

Answer 1

Just hug him, talk to him, and let him know you're sorry. It would be a good thing if he felt it, it might make him fight harder to wake up.

Answer 2

I'm soo sorry about your dad but the most important thing for you to do is something that will REALLY HELP him come out of his coma- you must visit him, touch his hand, talk to him about everything- all the things you've done together, go on and on, open up your feelings to him- bring music in that he loves and if they allow a small tv if he's a sports fan and his favorite team is on--- it has been proven that these little gestures help stir his memory into thinking and thinking will help him come out of his coma- it's stimulation technique and the more you stimulate and the earlier he comes around, the better his chances for a speedier recovery. Don't be afraid to talk to him like you were a little boy- you can cry, tell him you love him, because you do, I can tell how much by the desperation in your request for an answer- see him as soon as possible and if they allow- a family member should stay with him around the clock at least for the first 72 hours to see if you can stimulate him out of his coma. My prayers are with you, this is sooo hard- just hold his hand and pray and reminisce of all the good memories you two have shared- it is proven that they can hear while in a coma so go to him and god bless---my prayers are with your family.

Answer 3

Head injury is serious. I had an uncle that fell off a ladder and hit his head. He was in a coma for several weeks and when he woke up, he had problems remembering. He liked to play the guitar and sing, but he could not remember any of the songs he used to sing. After a few months, it started to come back and after a few years, he was his old self. My ex was a nurse in the ER for a while. She could see how the EEG would change when you talk to someone. Just talking with them and touching them can help them come back from where ever it is coma patients go.

I can see why you are scared. This is not the way you want to remember your father, but if you are there by his side, I am sure that is the way he would like to remember you. Don't let the opportunity pass you by.

Answer 4

First giant hugs to you and you family.
A few years ago i was involved in an accident...While i was directing traffic at a minor traffic accident, a male in one ton truck decided he wasn't going to wait and that nothing was going to stop him...He waited till i got in the middle of the road to make me his target. My body was struck on my left side, i was no match for the truck, it split my helmet...I had internal injuries, fractured sternum, paralysis, bruising and scraps, a lot of injuries...I also suffered a tramatic brain injury and it has taken a lot of time and energy to get my brain function right...I have no memorys of being a kid, nothing from highschool, well i remember stupid unimportant stuff. I do remember most of my military time, not people, but what i did, none of that has left me and my work as a firefighter, i remember all that. Geez i could go on about that kinda stuff...
This drove me nuts for a while and the pain, i will have to live with for the rest of my life. I still have a slight speach problem and some words i try to spell backwards. I have no idea where commas go, i do remember periods come at the end of a sentance, but i dont mind that crap, makes no differents to me...LOL thank god for spell check.
So you see, you dad may be alright...He hears you believe me, talk to him, tell him you love him, Right now with the injury either thay have put him in a coma, or is he in one from the accident? They use a drug induced coma to let things heal from the inside out and is the best place for him right now. So talk, touch and even tell jokes or what happened in you day. Have faith your dad will be alright.
Just know this, dad is not going to wake up nice, with brain injuries he more than likely will wake up angry as hell and combative and it may scare you...Know this is part of it...
Take care your father, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers....Be there for him...

Spell checker isnt working so forgive the misspelled stuff...

Answer 5

no one can really tell of what the outcome would be for a patient who has a trauma on the head.there are a lot of cases where people still survived after being in a coma for a certain period.
i can relate with how you feel.i lost my dad as well at a very young age.I've seen him unconscious, lying on the hospital bed (he had aneurysm).in a way i kind of envy you since you are able to absorb the situation that he might not wake up,when i wasn't.so let him know, even by having to whisper out how you feel to him would help a lot.there are some researches which states some people who were unconscious are able to grasp on the words they hear and feel when others are touching them.

fight your fears away.take the precious time you are given.don't waste it dwelling on what may happen.if things would go worst (though i hope & pray it would NOT!), at least you were able to spend time with your father and tell him & made him feel how much you love him.

i'll pray for you to have courage and for your father to get well..best of luck! Ü

Answer 6

The fact that your father has made it so far is a good sign and warrants some guarded optimism. Not knowing any specifics, I have to answer in a general way. Your father is currently in a coma. Comatose conditions can be reversed but that depends upon the severity of the injury.
Go see your father.

Answer 7

Your dad will be OKAY!! These things are SO SO difficult to get through, but you have to believe that everything happens for a reason. Pray for your dad, love your dad, and make sure that he knows you do!! Physical touch from a loved one can make a world of difference. He's always been there for you, so do all that you can to be there for him! HE WILL BE FINE!! =) Keep your head up, and utilize all of the support that those around you want to give you. God bless!

Answer 8

that is really sad to hear but think about it hopefully nothing bad happens but what if something happens and you never get to tell him how you feel? even though hes not very stable im sure if you go visit him it will be good for the both of you. This is a good opportunity to actually show him you care many dads feel they are not loved by their children prove him wrong. Dont be discouraged by fear that he will hear you be happy that you actually have a chance to tell him how much he means to you

Answer 9

People can recover from head injuries. Go see him. It will make you feel better and it might be the push he needs to wake. If you don't want to hold his hand or anything, that is ok. Just go sit by the bed and talk to him. If you can't think of anything to say, read to him. Just hearing your voice will be positive. Good luck...

Answer 10

Yes, people do come out of it! Now, your dad needs you, You could be the very one who brings him out of it! Remember the good times when you talk to him, tell him how much you love him! I am sure that if you were in the hospital they would have a hard time getting him from your side! Yes, the touch is vital!
Kiddo, your DAD needs you, I hope you stand strong for him in his time of need!

Answer 11

There's not much you can do except hope. The prospects for recovery from such injuries are unpredictable -- it could happen, or may not. Which has the unpleasant property that this may be dangling over you for years. But he would want you to carry on, and live the best life you can. That is the normal sequence of things: parents give us life, and then pass on, and we must do the best we can with it.