How do you feel about older women try to behave like twenty-somethings?

Question

As someone of 21 I often told I act older than I am. I have a tendency to befriend and look up to, older women (when I say older, generally women in their 40's and beyond). That said, I find it extremely disheartening to see certain women trying to recapture their youth.

Answer 1

You always ask good questions.. :o)

I feel sad for them too. They have bought - hook, line and sinker - into modern 'values', which basically teach that the only valuable members of our society are the 20-something, beautiful, verile, asthetically appealing ones. Really the sad part is that society has robbed them of true quality.

I'm 30 and have always been told the same as you - that I act older. It kinda bugs me sometimes, but then at the same time I don't think I will forget what's important when I'm older. People say I look about 25 - but I'm not caught up in the youth culture. (I do moisturise, and cleanse!)

Young people need to realise that life is tough - but every year you live is important, and you are a person from being a baby to the day you die, and you always have value. There is always something to enjoy in life - no matter what your age. Looking like a cover-model has absolutely no lasting value.

At some stage, these older women trying to be twenty-somethings, only end up looking and acting like old-slappers. Not attractive at all. What IS attractive, is a woman who might have wrinkles, she might have a bit of grey in her hair, but she damn well knows who she is. She has wisdom that comes with age, she smiles because she is happy not because she is trying to impress anyone. She accepts people for who they are, not for what they look like - and she accepts herself the same.

Confidence is the sexiest, most attractive quality in anyone - and people who age gracefully have that.

Answer 2

There are some things I don't think are all that appropriate for middle-aged women to do or wear, but at the same time it is possible that - with your age being what it is - what you don't realize is that people can get to be 40 and over while never having felt they lost their youth at all. In other words, because you see them as old you see what they do as trying to recapture their youth. Because they know how much people remain the same no matter how old they get (and particularly when they're healthy) they are simply doing whatever they do because they never got to feeling old.

My mother and a lot of women of her generation just acted and dressed old when they were as young as 39 or 40. I always felt as if my mother was always old. When she was in her seventies she said, "I wish I knew how young I really was when I was 40." My mother (and other people of her generation) lived feeling and acting old for over 30 years more than they should have. Of course, my mother's generation went through things my generation never had to go through.

You'll only realize and believe this when you're 40, but 40 actually is still "youth" - its just the higher end of youth. 50's and sometimes 60's are not youth, but these days they are also very far from being "old".

Probably most of what you see in older women isn't that they're trying to "recapture" their youth. Its that they are remaining youthful - and there's a difference. There's nothing admirable about the person who "goes gently into that good night", particularly if they go too early. There's something very sad about hearing someone in their 70's regret having believed they were old 30 years too early.

Answer 3

I never try to be something I am not. My older sons think I act younger and my 18 yr old says I'm 'trying' to, but I do not try to, he's perceiving me as older (i am 42) therefore he thinks I am acting 'out' of what he imagines I should act like. I love to dance, so while I am cleaning and running around the house I will dance around too, that makes me appear to seem or act younger. I am also 5 foot 5 and weigh 115 pounds, slender, I think that makes me appear younger than I am-I have younger men hit on me often still, that can definitely make you feel better and lift your spirits, when I am happier I feel younger also. I have many Friends my age and many that are in their 20's, I am me. If a 40 plus year old is 'trying' to act younger, maybe she is having a hard time dealing with aging.

Answer 4

I'm 38 and have always been of a mature nature. I married, raised my children and now it's just me and my husband. I am still young inside and look young outside, so I act and feel like I'm about 25 again. I really missed out on all the fun that age had to offer, by my own choice, yes, but now there is nothing stopping me. Sorry to have become a threat in the "man market" though, I totally love being hounded by the guys ages 19- 30. They sure do know how to make me feel young again. So far, so good.

Answer 5

Well, I don't know. I'm thirty five.Should I be on this forum since it seemingly consists of twenty somethings or younger?If that be the case, then maybe I should settle down in my rocker with my knitting. You may find yourself trying to eventually recapture your youth be it with a box of hair dye to cover stubborn grey hair, or surfing. Some people aren't ready to settle down in their coffin yet.

Answer 6

I beleive that youthfulness is on the inside, and you should let it flow... now that doesn't mean women 40 & 50 should run out to buy thongs and way too short skirts. The youth that's inside will shine outwardly naturally.

Answer 7

That bothers me BIG time. I think some women fight the age old (no pun intended) desire to be more appealing to men. And unfortunately, some of them attract the guy that will care the least about them. I think women who "fit" their age are much more attractive in terms of confidence and acceptability - they know who they are and they accept it! I love it when a woman can be who she is and does not change to try and suit those around them.

Answer 8

As a woman of 45...I can't imagine wanting to recapture my youth. From my viewpoint, life is much better now that I really know who I am & I wouldn't trade my experiences for anything.
I believe the women who do this have self-esteem issues & are afraid of what growing old means to them...I say BRING IT ON!
Just don't let it bother you, they are searching for something they'll never attain...I feel for them. ;)

Answer 9

you're probably smarter and greater observant. women people nonetheless tend to be over forced with baby rearing and baby care. men do no longer nurse commonly or push a baby out or get stretch marks and breasts that sag from being crammed with milk. that's a sacrifice and you're smart to evaluate the gravity of this selection. My spouse on no account became into attracted to toddlers which she suggested have been blobby , and bothersome monkeys. She ought to no longer faux pastime in having certainly one of her very own and on no account meant to. a number of it fairly is according to kinfolk atttitudes in direction of toddlers. in case you have had abortions , you will possibly no longer choose to have toddlers because of the fact it reminds you of what a skill baby could have been like. it fairly is hassle-free in women people who've had abortions. you ought to be paying interest to who's saddled with the main artwork for the longest time. it remains women people who pay the optimal value to convey offspring into the worldwide. Your physique and pursuits are on no account the comparable after the start of an adolescent.

Answer 10

i don't think it is annoying ,but be careful yourself our youth passes by so quickly before you know it you will 40 something wondering where it all went you might try to recapture your youth