I cheated on a perfect husband...?

Question

This Sat., 12/9, is my 28th wedding anniv You say if I cheated on a perfect husband that he must not be that perfect, right? Maybe so, but that's not the reason for this ? In a nutshell, I had a 7 year relationship w/ a Psychologist. It was the 1st extra-marital encounter for both of us. About 6 years ago my husband discovered this relationship and has forgiven me. I still work w/ this Dr. Ironically, what I lose sleep over is how abruptly "Dr."totally shut me out of his life, after so many years and all that we had shared, and w/out even talking to me. I knew he had been going to Trivia w/ another blonde from work but I was never jealous, but I prob. should have been. He admitted that there is definitely an attraction there. I'm not asking for help to deal w/ this w/ my family-that's resolved-But how do I get over this man. I loved him for so long (& still do). Why would he treat me that way; it's like we never loved at all. I hurt at work everyday when I see him

Answer 1

I would bet the good doctor is taking a bit of his own advice. Any marriage counselor will tell you to cut off all contact with your lover, because you can't work on a marriage if there's a third person involved ... and your doctor is helping you do that. Appreciate that little bit of kindness, no matter how cruel it might appear on the surface. Then let him go and focus on your family. And, if you can, find a new job.

Answer 2

Have you ever heard the saying what comes around goes around. You hurt your husband and family pretty bad and all you talk about is how this sleazy unethecal pile of **** doctor was screwing around with you and someone else.

Your not a victim; you got what you deserve. This doctor used you? And you think this was his first extra marital affair? Are all women just dumb when it comes to men? God knows how many he had on the side.

You are one of the most arrogant people I've ever heard of. You need to grow up, stop thinking the world is all about you, and get away from this guy. Just the fact that you stay working in his office shows you want it to continue.

Your focus should be regaining the trust of your family, nurturing your family, and giving all you can to make them happy. Not just worry about poor you.

If you dont' do the right thing, your a sick puppy; your husband should dump you like yesterdays news. Stop thinking about yourself and stop working with a man that you still want to be with. If you really love your husband, then leave the sleazy doctor that shouldn't be in practice, and never see him again. Do the right thing; finally.

Answer 3

woooow you are so into yourself. if your husband forgave you why are u still doing it? even though u might not be sleeping with this guy, just thinking of him like that and looking at him like meat is cheating- thats what Jesus says! I'm not sure maybe you get your morals from somewhere else. Please do me a favor: stop it. You should get a job somewhere else and not see this person anymore to prevent you from the temptation. Go home and work on Fixing your marriage, instead of putting yourself in a position that could cause damage to your marriage.

Answer 4

u represent a flaw in him, something he is ashamed of doing, so he will avoid u. he may still have feelings for u, but u will never see them. u get over him when u can expect nothing more from him, not even an acknowledgement that he once loved u. if your hubby has forgiven u, why do u still want the forbidden fruit, love the man who didn't reject you, who stood by you through thick and thin, and forget this other man, who is just a coward anyway who can't face himself.

Answer 5

Plz realize the fact that " The end" of your real life drama has come.. The drama is over with the climax scene. Plz come come out of the hangover of the role you played in the drama. God has given you another chance to lead a normal life with your family (in fact He has saved you from a impending family breakdown).

Blame it all (all that happened in the past)on your emotions and come to trems with reality.. You can make or break your life... My sincere advice is that... start a new life , a new beginning with your husband and Kids... Make sure that you give 100% attention and focus to them...and pray to God for help.....Things will be alright ..Good luck..

Answer 6

The feelings are obviously not the same in return. You can chase after dreams but, you cannot catch them either they too are not real. Just as his feelings for you are not or were not real. They were a passing thing. Move on with your life it is so very short. Trust me on this. You need to be happy. Do what you have to do to be happy. There is noone else in this world you can count on more than yourself. We all travel different paths in life find your path to happiness. Don't sit idly by waiting for what may never come.

Answer 7

Still thinking about yourself? This is what got you in this situation. Do you see a pattern here? You mistook the Dr. who really was only having sex with you for a lover. How shallow, selfish and foolish you are. I hope your husband will find somebody more worthy someday. You will then find the true meaning of hurt.

Answer 8

Your poor husband!!!!!!!! He's still with you? After you had an affair on him for SEVEN YEARS??? And your still hung up over the affair???

I guess when your husband gets tired of your B.S...you'll have all the time in the world to ponder over this man who has destroyed your life and marriage...

Answer 9

You need to focus more on your husband and home life. You will ruin your marriage if you don't. These feelings you have will spill over at home and your husband will know. Or get another job.

Answer 10

You can't get over anything that you're faced with on a daily basis. You need to find another place to work. Your family needs you, and you need to do it.
Simple as that. Out of sight, out of mind.