I'm heartbroken!?

Question

I'm so hurt.. I had one boyfriend and one alone for 6 months now and we broke up 4 days ago... He broke up with me.. Then an hour ago my friend phoned me and told me he (my boyfriend Cody) had slept with my best friend. I keep crying.. I can't believe why my friend would even tell me that?? Why would my other friend do that?? At school my friend was so supportive and tried to comfort me and tell me how sorry she is about it and then she goes and has sex with him.. After I told her that I loved him, .. I'm so hurt.. What do I do?? I'm only 15.. I can't believe that my friend, I've known her since gr. 3! We played barbies together, we go shopping together, wetalk about everything.. I can't believe that all this time she's been lying to me.. I can't stop crying and tomorrow is school and what am I going to say, the entire school knows by now.. What am I going to say to my friend? How am I going to face her, and go to school??
What am I going to say to her? and him?

Cody's 17, 2 years older than me

I'm serious.. My friend said it was true!

Answer 1

Hey girl its okay. This is a hard one for you. But it will be all okay.

I remember when I was 15 and my 'first major guy' and I broke up. OMG I thought nothing could ever hurt like that. I guess in a way nothing does...well almost. It can hurt like that when your relationship breaks down everytime...but as we get older, get better at relationships, better at breakups too...it gets easier...you will see. Pamper yourself and never mind the a$$holes out there!

As for your friend- not very good, but this stuff happens. Remember, you guys are teens, you are all learning about relationships and the strong power that sexuality weilds on us humans sometimes. This happens to adults on occasion- and has to do with lack of respect. Im so sorry your friend betrayed you like that. 4 days is way too short. Very disrespectful. Maybe you shouldn't be her close friend. You defineitly need to tell her how she hurt you. Tell her how you feel. And who knows...always check with the woman...men are dumb...make sure you hear her side of the story. If you need to, mark her off your good friends list for a time

Its hard when people let you down. It looks like both these guys did. Sorry to hear it. Find another friend you can talk with, ask her to hang with you at school- have a support friend, try to talk with those you should, and screw what everyone else thinks about it.

Walk with your head high...you didnt do anything wrong. you are on your way to being a strong woman someday. Right now relax, take a nice hot bath...and do something you like to do..such as...read, draw, write, rearrange your room, call up an old friend, bake cookies, or dance to some tunes ...anything you enjoy.

Good luck and blessings to you!

Answer 2

First of all, are you sure that this is really true? Maybe this other friend was not telling the truth. I know that you are really hurt and upset !

Would your friend from 3rd grade really do that - maybe you should call her and tell her what you were told and you since you couldn't believe she would do that - you wanted to be sure.
Then if the answer is yes - you will need to talk - or just tell her you are too upset to talk right now.

She should be worried about facing you , not the other way around (if it is true).

Well I am sure you must feel like you can't trust people right now, but I know that through all of this you will learn some very important life lessons about love, sex, dating and friendships.
Take it slow, and day by day you will feel better and stronger. Watch for new friendships that arise in all of this. All the best in this to you!

Answer 3

You say nothing. Seriously. That would only fuel whatever her motivation is.

Sure, you are hurt and you OBVIOUSLY don't have a good friend. BUT...do you want to even be with some dude that is sleeping with people at his age??? I am assuming he is right around your age and I know at 15, this shouldn't be happening (OK, so I am old enough to be your mother, but I know that middle school can be pretty tough with peers and that).

You say NOTHING. If he says anything to you, just say something like, "Well.....so you are a male slut. Are you proud of that?"

If she says something to you, say something like, "well, I really found out who my friends are, didn't I?" and leave it. Easier said than done, but you know what? You will get your point across and make you the better person in the long run.

Answer 4

I know how hard this must be for you. But look at it this way, the whole school may know, but think about it, do you think they're really going to look at you and laugh, or are they going to look at the two of them and think it's sleazy and mean. I'm sure more people than you think will be supportive, and of those stupid ones that aren't they aren't worth your emotions, and you have every right to tell them so. "Youre not worth my emotional turmioil." SImple and to the point. Also try to hang out with people you don't go to school with. Sometimes we spend so much time in our lives, in our little worlds that we forget the big picture. Try to step back and look at that big picture. We all do it, not just in highschool, but in college, or at work etc. It's going to suck for a while, but when you're at school just act like you're above all that. You're too good to be bothered by the sleazy people who would do that to you. Eventually after trying to make everyone else think that's how you feel, you'll actually start to feel it.

Answer 5

Oh, man, that's harsh. I'd be so hurt too. It's okay to cry. Talk to someone about it if you can. Another friend though, because the friend you're talking about isn't really your friend. I wouldn't say anything to her or to him, unless they get in your face and won't back down, and if they do just tell them you don't want to have anything to do with them and walk away. Try not to worry about what the other people in school are saying, even though I know that's really hard. The only people whose opinions matter are the people who care about you, and they won't be talking about you behind your back.

Answer 6

I had a friend like that- she has no friends now- and cannot be trusted - she is trouble- and has not changed in over 10 years- actually got worse- She is the one w the problem - not you- if she has any heart she will be too ashamed to even look at you- it is ok to show and feel emotion= take care-D

Answer 7

First of all, you're 15 years old, you and your friend shouldn't be sleeping with anybody.

Secondly, sometimes we fall in "love" with somebody because of who we think they are, not who they really are. Once you can see that this guy is just a jerk, it won't hurt as much as it does right now.

Thirdly, your friend is obviously not acting like one. Give her a chance to explain, and go from there. Before you blame it all on her, remember his part in it, too.

Answer 8

Well for 1 I home you didnt have sex with him and for 2 at 15 your friend and cody must be a slut so they are trash forget about them and move on

Answer 9

well, i suggest you go to him first and tell him what kind of Lier he was and tell him how you feel about it and if he did that then leave him there's someone better than that somewhere else trust me. and your friend tell her how you feel and ask her y she did it to you of all people. don't get scared or afraid of anything they say to you, what i do all the time is face my fears. it may not be that easy for you just think about what your going to say and think about this fear is: False, Evidence, Appearing, Real. personally if i was one of your friends i would beat the crap out of your boyfriend, i don't care who you are or who think you are you don't treat a female like that and your friend i would tell her where she belongs in the crowd. I'm 16 and Ive been trough the same thing i was used to get closer to one of my friends. so like i said face your fears and speak with your heart and don't believe in any of their lies OK. and good luck. and if you need some more advice then email me , OK.

Answer 10

I know you must be feeling like complete crap but it happens to the best of us. It's happened to me and i am still best friends with her. In life you learn to forgive. You may not be able to forget and that hurts but hating her for sleeping with your ex is just silly. My best friend use to sleep with the guys i liked before i got a chance to because she was jealous of me. She would tell me that all the time. (well when ever she was drunk, which was every wk end) She wanted a taste of happines before me.

Life goes on and you will find it just gets tougher, but you just have to get through it.