2006-12-05 11:53:59 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I'm really asking what YOU think but I had to word it "most people" so I wouldn't get the question deleted for chatting.
2006-12-06 01:20:52 · update #1
When you live together first you are trying out marraige. This sounds like a good idea, especially when the divorce rate it so high, why not give this a try and make sure it works first, right? My answer is wrong. You are first of all cheating yourself of those first weeks and months following a wedding that are exciting. You are in love, have gotten married, and it is fun and exciting to finally get to live together and do the horizontal boogie whenever you want to. This honeymoon period cannot possible be the same without all the stress and excitment leading up to a wedding, even a simple one. The joy cannot be experienced if you live together first.
The other problem you are facing is when it doesn't work. Here you are in a psuedo marraige, sharing bills, toothpaste, and possibly annoying habits. When you decide it won't work, you have to go through a practical divorce to end it. It will be a very difficult separation and you may even need to get a lawyer involved. It is hard enough to end a marraige that is miserable, people stay unhappy for years before they get around to being miserable enough to actually go through a divorce. If you find it is not working, you may end up married anyway, because it is easier.
Which brings me to my final point. Marraige isn't only about love. It is also about commitment and determination. Once you determine you have someone you love, who has the same goals that you have in life, and that wants the same things you do, if you decide to commit to that person it won't matter if you try it out first. Which returns us to the first part of this, don't ruin your honeymoon period.
2006-12-05 12:06:57 · answer #1 · answered by Krista13 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In some mainstream denominations it is considered a sin to live together without being married and I have also see some of these people first hand. being judged by the church.
God ordained marriage and in some cases people who are short on a long term commitment some time uses live together as a easy out.
I have done two weddings in the past year where people who have lived together had decided to get married.
2006-12-05 20:00:19 · answer #2 · answered by revfergy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am going to have to disagree with MOST of the answers here. I live with my boyfriend. We fully intend to be married one day and are BEYOND excited about the prospect of being Husband and Wife. We are happy at the moment just living together and deeply in love, our Wedding night will be no less exciting because we had lived together first. I feel that it's actually what the individuals feel more comfortable with, what works for one couple may not work for another. If one couple feels that Marriage is a must before sleeping in the same bed every night, then more power to them. If another couple just wants to "shack up" for a while, then thats fine too (at least in this case if the couple breaks up, they don't have to pay a lawyer thousands of dollars!)
2006-12-05 20:35:57 · answer #3 · answered by Easter Bunny 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm obviously not most people because I disagree with most of the above answers. I don't think one is any better than the other. It's the same to me either way you look at it, it's the same under the eyes of the law also.
I think it depends on the individual couple and what they are comfortable with.
2006-12-05 20:02:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd prefer to be married than live together without legally bound. When you are married, you have a certain kind of commitment towards the relationship which just makes you work harder at preserving it. Living together without getting married... to me, that just feels like something is missing
2006-12-05 20:00:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seriously I am not old-fashioned merely a 29 year old with sensibility. Marriage is definitely better.
Of course depends on more details like kids involved, etc. The problem with my theory and beliefs is that divorce is so easy to obtain now, does it really all matter? Some don't even take marriage seriously .
2006-12-05 19:55:35 · answer #6 · answered by ☺ PeeJ ☺ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
studies have shown that people live longer when married or living with a companion. I'm sure they only asked the happily married couples to take the survey.
2006-12-05 19:56:01 · answer #7 · answered by tampico 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The older generation thinks that being married is the only way and the younger generation wants to know what they are getting first.
2006-12-05 19:55:50 · answer #8 · answered by MsFancy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MOST people live together first. the way it's supposed to be is you don't live with the person till you are married. but that's where we get all those "common law marriages from"
2006-12-05 19:57:02 · answer #9 · answered by Starry Eyes 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know of many a relationship that fell apart from moving in together, so it depends. Case by case.
2006-12-05 19:55:36 · answer #10 · answered by ßαßε 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋