I am a bit shy but funny and very nice to others. Why don't I have any friends? I am a bit fat but not unattractive otherwise. I meet people but never seem to get to know others well and become friends. All the friends I have ever had turned out to be using me for something for a while and then just stopped talking to me when they no longer had a use for me. What is wrong with me?
2006-12-05 11:41:29 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You may just need to keep in contact with that person, hang out with them, get their number, or IM or Email them. Maybe you have to be like with them more, or talk to them more, or find more friends to all hang out with so your friend doesnt feel like weird cuz they are only hanging out with one person
2006-12-05 11:44:01 · answer #1 · answered by Elena ♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be a combo of things, but I am guessing you don't come as interesting to the ones you are trying to befriend, and you are too shy and discouraged from past attempts to try for people more like yourself. You are not trying in the circles best for you and are only around people who either ignore or take advantage of you or do both when it's convenient. Coz you're so nice. That is actually not nice, coz you are selling yourself and them short. Even if you got to know someone really well and figured out they wouldn't like knowing the real you, you could still give them a chance or move on to someone else.
Is there a problem at home you don't want anyone to know about? This might also be a part of the issue, if you have something you're afraid to let people become too close to you.... You're so nice to them and hope they will not dislike you, but then you kind of shy away when they get too close to the imaginary boundaries you've put up.
There is nothing wrong with you. Just try a little harder.
2006-12-13 09:07:02 · answer #2 · answered by *babydoll* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Possibly, you're coming across as a bit dull to them- sometimes I meet people who are very nice, but just extremely dull. It's not that they're bad people, we simply don't have anything in common. I recommend that you join some groups (such as a band, or a yoga class) in a hobby that interests you so that you can meet other people with a common interest, which should help in meeting people that you have something to talk about with. Also, appearance doesn't matter. While you may be a little overweight, who honestly cares? If you have to lose weight for a person to be your friend, then clearly they aren't worthy of being your friend in the first place. Try to be a little more outgoing, and just make an effort to smile at others and be polite, but don't go out of your way to be favourable to them, because this sends out the message to them that you're a pushover, which will only further encourage them to take advantage of you. Don't worry, if you're still young, just know that kids can often be quite cruel due to their own insecuritites, but once you get older, you'll realise that eventially most people grow out of that cruel mentality. Hope this helps!! :)
2006-12-05 19:49:53 · answer #3 · answered by jemm4president 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the people that you are friends to for a little bit but are using you don't really understand who you really are inside. Try to befriend someone very slowly and when they realize that they are your friend they will treat you kindly in return. There are many places that you can make friends at, online, clubs, neighborhoods. Try going to new places where you know there are people and be outgoing and talk to people. Just if you go online make sure not to give away any personal info unless you know the person in real life. If all fails ask the people (nicely!) why they aren't your friend anymore. Maybe something happened to them that you didn't know about and that is why they aren't you friend.
2006-12-05 19:48:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first i understand. When you meet someone you think could be a friend, get phone number, email or anything other. Start trying to hang out as much with this person as possible. Well i hate this try not to do this I have many friends and sometimes i become good friends with someone who had a BFF and the other BFF calls you a friend steeler. Also this happens too when you try to hang with someone they are ignoring you and talking to the other person i hate that too. nothing is wrong with you try to spend time. If you start getting to know your new friend invite them too the mall or somethin. hope this helps, i'm a good friend and know these thing. Good luck
-jess please vote me 1# answer thanx and good luck
2006-12-05 19:47:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi. eventually I have the same problem and even I posted question on my forum where only 3 people answered. I had many friends in MA, and since I moved to Chicago area I found no one, except few in work and school, but we don't hang out. But I found here people little different than those I met in MA. I mean it takes lots more effort to befriend, to talk, people seem to trust less, but on other hand nobody ever used me, unlike in Mass. What I also found, people here where I live almost never talk about gay issues, if they talk they neutral or even friendly to these, in Mass it was usually negative comments or questioning but I I did not live in Boston, rather in western suburbs area.
2006-12-05 22:41:56 · answer #6 · answered by master343 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are friendly and outgoing you will have friends As an observer i would suggest joining a social club like the ones at the library or go to places where you might find people with the same interest's as you like the beach or an arts and craft seminar you will find Friends hopefully to last you a lifetime
2006-12-05 19:47:04 · answer #7 · answered by amdm92 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if u want to fit in do something the popular people would do or change something .. well thats not a good idea so be urself and nothing is wrong with u!!! if u want to find freinds who are truly ur friends then go for people who seem alone or seem the type to not judge or ne thing i know im pretty popular but not like a cheerleader girl .. but i have friends who no one will hang out with .. but turns out i think they are the coolest people in the world and no everything is fine .. or u could do what i did to find new and better friends is join a sport i choose v ball and i love it !!!!!! i have found my bestfriends and love them to dealth!! try something why not try volleyball u dont have to be skinnny skinny to play or tall or n e thing .. try it nothing can fail !!
2006-12-05 19:46:34 · answer #8 · answered by linny !! 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i have the same problem, i think it's because i shy and usually go along with whatever conversation that the person want to talk about,i be leave that most people don't like a passive person,i also fine that the people that like me they really like me allot and the all of a sudden the stop. hope this helped, if you would like to talk more you can email me at **jnmalc@yahoocom
2006-12-05 19:58:10 · answer #9 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with you. It's the other people you know who have got something wrong with them.
I'm in the exact same boat as you- I actually felt as though I had asked the question! Sorry I can't give you better advice...
2006-12-05 19:45:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋