for awhile, and we've agreed. We have an extra bedroom and want to be there for her during this difficult time. However, we have two dogs and a cat. All three get along great with each other. She has two cats that she wants to bring with her. They constantly fight and one of them has even bitten her several times. We have asked that she not bring her cats, as we don't want to upset our pets or put them in harms way, nor do we want their bad manners destroying our things. She is really upset with us now and says that we aren't being fair. Her parents have offered to keep the cats (she doesn't want to live with them, yes, we thought of that) until she gets established and finds her own place to live. She wants the cats with her. Are we being unfair?
2006-12-05 11:19:14 · 17 answers · asked by Sharon 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are being more than fair to her. You are opening up your home. Tell her to leave the cats. If they all got along, it would be different. If she doesn't like the idea of living without her cats, then let her find someone else to live with. And no, before anyone suggests it, keeping the cats in her room is not an option. Cats always get out. They do not like to stay where they are welcome and inevidably find the one thing that are not welcome to touch.
2006-12-05 11:30:00 · answer #1 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately , and sorry to say ,you will not be able to do so ( I know it will hurt , but the truth always hurts ) You see there is a saying that .." YOU CANT CHANGE A LEOPARDS SPOTS " ?? You cant stop a lion from hunting , you cant convert a crow into a peacock ???? and now since you have had a baby , things may take a different turn i.e you would be more occupied with the baby , less time for him , more responsibilities etc etc ... I wish you all the best , all the happiness , all the good fortune and pray that may GOD keep you in his protection .. but you are involved with a very unreliable person may GOD show him the right path too
2016-05-22 22:29:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give cats a try. If it doesn't work out, send them to the parents' house. You're not unreasonable to ask her to keep the cats elsewhere - especially if there IS an option; but in such difficult time, perhaps her cats will be a huge consolation to her. Be kind, and try it out. You might be surprised at how these animals might get along. (My mom has six cats, and my brother and his wife moved in with her when they were doing a remodel, with their two cats; there was some tension in the first few days, but then it worked out just fine, everyone got along.)
2006-12-05 11:39:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No 5 animals would be too many. Her parents are willing to take her and the cats that is where she should go. By suggesting that to her does not mean you don't want to help her. But you have to look out for yourselves too. This is trouble waiting to happen. I love my sister but I could not take her into my home I wouldn't put her out on the street if she had no other options then I would deal with the situation and working on getting her one her feet but with other options....
2006-12-05 11:39:55 · answer #4 · answered by Pandora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, forst of all you husbands sister should be grateful that you two are letting her move in with you. If I were you, I would tell her just like it is, and let her bring her cats along,,,then when things start happening just like you predicted they would, she will not have anythign to say. She will have to give the cats to the parents because she will not be able to deny that her cats are ill manered and they are agressive. Just give her a chance to see it for herself. If after you tgve her the chance and its screwed up she will have to make a choice between her cats and being able to stay with you guys.
2006-12-05 11:27:58 · answer #5 · answered by Yahoo User 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Trust me, the cats will be the least of the problem. Remember the old saying "Three's a crowd". I'd help her find a place of her own but don't let her move in with you (unless you want to find yourself in turmoil)
2006-12-05 11:24:39 · answer #6 · answered by LanceMiller77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Five animals in one house is calling for madness. Its a nice jesture you're letting her stay. However, you clearly have boundaries that she should respect as the visiting party. It's not like her cats are being left in the cold.
2006-12-05 11:23:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Seriously she has to find a home for the cats . She is lucky you took her in at all . Tell her to look for temporary housing for them .
2006-12-05 11:26:46 · answer #8 · answered by IT'S JUST ME ! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being unfair would be telling her to sleep on the streets. Its your house and you set the rules. Its hard with family, but be firm, or she'll live there forever.
2006-12-05 11:29:57 · answer #9 · answered by Jen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She'll probably be selfish & immature about other things, too (noise at night, undesirable guests, her "rights" in the home, etc). Proceed carefully; put it all in writing FIRST (length of stay, payment amounts and when they're due, pet arrangements/limits); have all parties sign it. Good luck!!
2006-12-05 11:36:32 · answer #10 · answered by DivaDynamite 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋