I'm pregnant and I don't know if I can give my baby a good life, should I consider adoption?

Question

I'm 20 years old and I haven't graduated high school. I can't get anything better than minimum wage and I'm unsure if I would even know what I'm doing with my baby. My roomate has said she'll help me out, and my boyfriend says he'll be there too.
Sometimes, I'm sure I'll be able to do it, but other times, I'm not so sure.

I'm 20 years old and I haven't graduated high school. I can't get anything better than minimum wage and I'm unsure if I would even know what I'm doing with my baby. My roomate has said she'll help me out, and my boyfriend says he'll be there too.
Sometimes, I'm sure I'll be able to do it, but other times, I'm not so sure.
Some people have mentioned abortion, I don't believe in it. I couldn't take my child's life just because of my own selfish reasons. It's not the baby's fault. So please stop asking about abortion.

Answer 1

You think you wont know what to do but once that beautiful baby is born your motherly instincts will kick in, trust me you will know exactly what to do, it sounds like you have some good support so aslong as you always give your baby all the love it needs, i feel you will do ok...yes you've made a mistake, falling pregnant at this stage, but that doesnt make you a bad mother, the best of mothers have made mistakes, no-one is perfect. Just take all the help you are offered and do your best....good luck

Answer 2

I was pregnant at 15 and dropped out of school shortly after my son was born! I did go back and get my GED the same year I was to graduate high school! Yes, I considered adoption, I was only 15 what was I going to do with a BABY! But, once I sat down and really thought it through with myself, there was no way I could give up this baby. I wasn't even old enough to work so I had no money what so ever! But, this baby is my responsibility and I am going to give it the best life I can and love him forever! Yes I had a mom who helped me out a little but not a whole lot, she said you thought you were old enough to have sex and get pregnant so you are old enough to raise this baby! I think you will do an excellent job at being a parent! Yes I will tell you it is very hard for the first 6 months, after that it gets so much easier. Now 13 years later I couldn't have imagined not knowing my son and thinking he is out there somewhere and he has no idea who I am. But I think you should keep your baby and you will do just fine. The baby doesnt need money, it needs YOU!! Good Luck!! I hope this helped you some. Please consider keeping your baby, you will regret it later in your life when you are ready to have kids!!!

Answer 3

I think you should consider raising this baby. You are an adult, you can do it. Take it from someone who had a baby at 20, with a minimum wage job. Having a baby is not the end of the world. Maybe you should consider becoming a server until after you have the baby. Go work at Papa's or something so you can make good tips. Believe me it is way more money than minimum wage. But I had a little girl when I was 20. I went back to school and was able to get a good job. There is something about 9 months of pregnancy- trust me you will not want to let that baby go. This baby is not a mistake, you are still young enough to give your baby a good life. Do you go to church? Well this is just a storm, and in life you are going to go through so many. Twenty years from now when that baby is grown and you are visiting him/her in their college dorm, then you will be glad that you made the decision to keep this baby.

Answer 4

First off just let me say- it's so refreshing to hear someone say should I give my baby up for adoption...and not should I have an abortion? I have tons of respect for you for that. I think adoption is a great idea if you truly feel that you cannot care for the child...I think that if you just really set your mind to it, you could raise the child and be a great mother. And hey- have you ever considered getting your GED? There are places that will help you study and stuff to get it...nothing is impossible...and these days- a GED is pretty much equal to a highschool diploma. All I have is a highschool diploma and I've got a great job that I love and it pays really well too...enough that I could make it on my own if I had to...You are still young enough that you can change your life for the better...you just have to have faith in yourself and BELIEVE that you can do it...Good luck in whatever decision you choose...and no matter what- Don't let anyone else decide for you...do it because YOU want to...

Answer 5

There is support out there you could try and get welfare and food stamps. I'm also a new mom. My little girl is only 7 weeks 1 day old and she is a blessing. I could ever give her away. It is a tough job being a parent but you will get through it because this experience is new for both of us. Once you see your baby you would not want to give him/her up because they are a part of you. If you don't have any kind of help then adoption would be the next step but you should try first. I thought I could not take care of my baby after she was born because my fiance was helping me while we were staying together in the hospital but when I got home I managed and everything is great. He helps me the best way he can until we get married and move in our house together and be a family. Good luck!!!!

Answer 6

Of course you can consider it.

We can't help you decide, though. Only you know what your specific circumstances are. I understand that you feel like you won't be able to support him/her, but are there other factors you're not mentioning? Like will your boyfriend help financially?

Every woman has doubts about how good a mother she will be. So don't let those feelings dissuade you from keeping your baby. What might dissuade you is KNOWING you can't take care of him/her. Is this a feeling or a fact?

And also think about whether you'll regret it later, or whether you'll look back on it and be happy that you gave him/her a good life. Nobody else can know for sure how you'll feel.

Call Planned Parenthood at 1-800-230-PLAN. They will NOT pressure you to get an abortion, regardless of what some people tell you. It is Planned PARENTHOOD, not Planned Abortion. They are open to ALL your choices.

They are there to help you. Say you want to have the baby but need help deciding whether to put it up for adoption. They can get you prenatal care if you still need it. They can refer you to an adoption agency if that's the choice you make. If you decide to keep the baby they can also refer you to organizations that help young mothers and maybe a support group so you can meet other pregnant women and talk to them about your feelings. They will also offer to point you toward the Medicaid office, so you can apply for that and get insurance to cover you during pregnancy (if you need it.)

First of all they will set up an appointment with a counselor, so you can talk about your fears and decide whether to put the baby up for adoption. Most of their clinics have sliding scale fees. What you pay is based on what you can AFFORD to pay. If you don't make much at all, the counselor appointment will probably be FREE. Once you decide they will still be there, offering the help I listed above.

Please call them. You are not alone. There are people ready and willing to help! And they do not work for adoption agencies or groups who think every woman should raise her child no matter what. They will be impartial and offer real help.

Answer 7

I strongly believe in faith. You would'nt have been able to get pregnant if you could'nt handle the life to come. I got pregnant at 21 and the boyfriend was there but never helped me. I graduated from high school and went to college. I didnt know how to raise a baby, they dont come with a manual. I looked for support groups and found "baby basics" and talked to several different moms and learned how to be a good parent through to my son. Children need lots of love and all your time. The motherly instinct will kick in and you'll be a proud mommy. I have three children and love them very much. I struggled as a single mom with all of them. I worked factory jobs and made the money I needed to support them. I prayed after I had my two boys to stay home and be able to raise them. I also prayed to have a little girl. I got my prayers answered, but in a different way. My sons father died in a car accident and I recieved the money through his social security to stay at home and raise my boys. Then I got pregnant with my little girl. The odds are all against me being a single mom of now three. I have a house for the kids three bedroom and everything material they need. There is much help in the community if you really need it. Dont be afraid to ask, but dont take for granted. You can and will find a way to survive if that what your will is. Believe in yourself and eventually you will see all the good to come. When people say they will help you out, sometimes it doesnt work out that way and you will need to do it on your own. Giving a child a good life doesnt always constitute material, it means being that everything for the child and you. Good luck and God Bless you can do anything you put your all into.

Answer 8

I completely understand how you feel. This is a decision you have to make on your own. I admire you for taking everything into consideration and not just jumping into something whether it be abortion or whatever. If I were you, I would go to an adoption agency in your town and find out how it works and what your options are. Look at everything then make whatever decision is gonna be best for the baby and you. Good Luck and Take Care Honey.

Answer 9

I would never want to take advice from someone that is not a professional in this matter or does not know you personally. But, I think that if you have any doubts that you should speak with your Dr. and ask for the name of a counselor that counsil you and your boyfriend so that you can both make an informed decision. Your priest is also a good person to talk with. Do not let anyone pressure you one way or another because you know better than anyone if you are capable of taking on this lifetime responsiblity. Good Luck.

Answer 10

if your unsure then it would probably be the best idea but only you can make that decision having a baby is a life choice your whole life will change if you do decide to keep the baby it depends on if you feel like you can accomplish what you want in life with a child in your life now if not then giving it to someone who will treasure it with every ounce of its body would be the best idea by adoption people who adopt most of the time can not have children and they would do anything to have a child. About your roommate you should not depend on anyone else your roommate and bf could leave you or it could not work out between the two of you which would be horrible you can never depend on anyone but yourself so this decision is totally up to you