I cheated on my wife with a woman I have known for 4 years and have always been attracted to. I confesed to my wife and told her everything before she found out on her own. I left the house a week ago(not totally moved out). She is telling me she can forgive me and move on from this, and is asking me to come home. I have told her that I love this other woman and want to be with her, and the other woman also is in love with me and wants to be with me. My wife still says she loves me and wants me back. Do you think she really can forgive me, forget about everything and move on? Do you think even if I wanted to go back(which right now I don't) that it would ever work? would there always be questions and accusations?
2006-12-05 08:11:58 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to think long and hard about who exactly you are in love with and pick that woman. If you are still in love with your wife and other issues drove you to see another woman than go back to your wife and work it out. If you are not in love with your wife, and in love with this woman, than I say follow your heart and let your wife move on. Don't make any rash decisions. Good luck.
2006-12-05 09:57:08 · answer #1 · answered by I'm Trying 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She may forgive you but she will never forget and she will never trust you again. I AM A WOMAN.....It's to see you talk to another woman after something like this and not think you are cheating. I think if you love her go for it. I f you truly love the other woman go with her. If you go back to your wife but still love the other woman it will only be a matter of time before you are in the same situation again.
2006-12-05 08:16:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife forgave after I had many affairs.She forgave but I don't expect her to ever forget.I'am having more trouble forgiving myself.I haven't even looked at another woman for nearly 30 years now,that is not that I would cheat with.My advice my friend is go home.Your Mistress knew you were married and she didn't care.If you marry her will she care or go off with a married man.She is the one that can't be trusted. You have a wife that is one in a million,You would be wise to hold on to her before some other lucky guy gets her.My opinion is go home fool. Good luck.
2006-12-05 08:52:46 · answer #3 · answered by I'm Jerry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cheated on your wife. You told her that you weren't in love with her and that you are in love with the other woman, who is in love with you. You moved out of the house, effectively leaving your wife for the other woman, correct? Ok, we have established that you suck. Now, if you don't want to be with your wife, and you have told your wife this, why is she trying to make you come back? And why are you considering going back? You will only make everyone involved miserable. Neither of you will be happy and their will be neither love, trust, affection, nor respect. Just move all the way out and end the marriage so that each of you can get on with your lives. Yeesh!!! Too much drama!
2006-12-05 09:25:48 · answer #4 · answered by badkitty1969 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have said a lot about what you think you want. You are saying you want this other woman.
Do you really?
If you are saying 'well, how sure can you ever be?' then that is not a sure answer.
If you have problems with your wife, why not talk to her about them, whatever you chose to do.
Beware, the longer you have been with your wife, the more you will miss the habit of it.
If you are going to do something, then do your best to work out why you are really doing it and be clear about it.
Get or use one of your confidants, a mate you can rely on to help with this. Don't delay.
2006-12-05 08:35:43 · answer #5 · answered by mince42 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do your wife a favor and keep your cheating self away from her. Apparently she has low self esteem and will be better off without you passing on STDs and reinforcement of the fact that she's not enough for you.
So, break her heart again and move in with your chippie. And write again, when you're cheating on her. That will take about four years or so, right?
2006-12-05 08:21:05 · answer #6 · answered by Karen L 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If there are no children involved move out and stay out. The fact that this women was willing to uproot a family (at least man and wife) speaks volumes about her so you two deserve each other.
2006-12-05 08:22:06 · answer #7 · answered by onlineseeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wife deserves better.
A cheater will always get cheated on later down the road.
Leave her alone. She will realize she doesn't need you and deserves better.
There is no valid reason to cheat. If you didn't love her and want to be with her, there should of been divorce.
2006-12-05 08:47:17 · answer #8 · answered by Mutchkin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not if you love the other woman,
Don't hurt your loving wife any more. She is the only innocent one in this mess that YOU created by allowing yourself to chase after some other woman.
You need to grow up first.
2006-12-05 08:18:57 · answer #9 · answered by C 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The trust is broken. And why would you want to go back if you love this other woman? Pick yourself up and move on.
2006-12-05 08:16:13 · answer #10 · answered by MiMi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋