Why do so many look down on pregnant teens, even when they are taken care of their child?

Question

Im a mother and i had my daughter at 18 and i get looked down on all the time and it really does hurt. I take care of my daughter, i finished highschool when everyone thought i wouldnt.

wow i seen some people's answers and well some of them kind of hurt cause it made me feel as if they were thinking im nothing but a whore that got pregnant. Thats right i did finish school, im still with the babies father, i do live at home with my mother, i dont have a job but im planning out my life as i go, im going back to school here soon. And well i do take care of my daughter its different ways from what yall are saying, i take her to the doctor me and her father do buy her clothes food, etc cause he does have a job, when she is sick i take her to the doctor im the one that got up with her during those nights when she was first born i watch her during the day, i give her baths when she is dirty i clean her i feed her and i dress her so that does mean i DO take care of my daughter.

Answer 1

There stupid.. as as for BonesofaT commit... I had insurance and i bought all the stuff for my son I had him at 20.. I lived in my own place and have a state job..... just because you are a young mother gives no one else the right to pass judgement... I know older people who have family help them with there kids it is nature everyone does..... the praise the older people and blame the younger people when I know younger people who are way better parents then older ones... Keep you head up and take care of your baby like you are...

Answer 2

I have a friend who is about 9 years younger than me. I had my first child at 26, she had her first 1 year and 1 day after me. We are still friends! She "thought" that what some of us "older" mothers said to her that we were looking down on her. I had to explain that most of us are just remembering what we were doing at the same age and know that we could not have looked after a child when WE were that young. Remember that half of a relationship is how you interpret what someone else is saying or doing, they may not mean what you think they do. Give us a bit of a break as well. I am a 32 year old mom, who spends my time with mothers between the ages of 16 and 42, as mothering goes, we often have the same problems.

Answer 3

So many people are saying that you should be married before you have sex...that's for you to decide! As long as you are in love there is nothing wrong with it. But if some people believe sex is for married people only, that's fine...but they shouldn't push their beliefs on everyone else!!!! You were 18 when you got pregnant. Yes, thats very young, but it happened, you dealt with it, and finished school! Daddy is still with you! And you're lucky enough to have parents to help you out when you need it. That's what families do! These people who are putting you down for "depending on your family" for support must not know what FAMILY is all about...things happen...and family will always be there for you no matter what. Someone made a comment in one of the answers like-who bought the car seat etc. etc...First of all, married people who planned to get pregnant don't buy that stuff either....it's called a BABY SHOWER!!!!! Some people are freakin idiots, don't listen to them. Enjoy your child, treasure every moment, and have a great life.

Answer 4

Dont listen to negative comments, just give them a thumbs down. Since you have a man who supports both you and the baby, there is nothing wrong with staying home and taking care of your child. Being 18 makes you an adult, and you have been responsible by finishing highschool and staying with the father. It sounds like you made a mistake but are doing well with it. You should see how many woman in college are dropping out or running to clinics to get abortions because they got pregnant. If you take care of your responsibilities then dont listen to what others say, they dont know you.

Answer 5

I will admit, I am one of those people that sees a young girl with a baby and I think, why can't that be me. She can't take care of that baby. Of course I can't have kids so I pretty much get that thought when I see any pregnant woman. But you know what, I do know some young mothers who are great. And to you I applaud for finishing school and keeping your baby. Heck there are grown women who drown their kids and everything else, those are the people that make me sick much more than a loving mother at any age!

Answer 6

I know how much it hurts. My son is 5 I had him at 18. I am now 24, married, have a 8 yr old daughter through my husband, my 5 yr old son, and me and my husband have a 3 yr old daughter together. You should see the looks I get when I tell people that I have 3 kids the oldest being 8 and I'm 24. I dont know why people have to be so rude. My husband and I take care of all of our kids on our own, and at their other parents houses. Don't listen to all these other people who don't have anything positive to say. As long as you are doing your best to raise your child thats all that matters. Are you on your own now? Doing your best to provide for your baby?

Answer 7

people assume that young parents are not mature enough to take good care of there child or children.And because some teen moms aren't as successful as you in being a good mom. Sometimes having a kid is the motivation to make the change in a young persons life. It's a generalization that "you're too young" to know how to be a good parent. Don't let what anybody says or how anyone looks at you affect you. You be a great mom to your daughter and forget the negitivity.

Answer 8

Its like a stereotype. Unfortunately there are alot of teens who cant take care of their kids and for the ones who do, the rest make it look bad for them. My mom had her first 3 kids by the age of 20 and yes though she needed some help along the way I think she did a terrific job..Even better than some parents I know who waited till they were a little older..As long as you and your baby know the truth thats all that matters.

Answer 9

I am currently a teen mother, I had my baby at 15. I'm still with the father also. I'm also in the process of finishing high school...I get looked down upon alot, b/c ppl just think that teens are irresponisble, which sum are and others arent. They think that we can't handle children, and that we'll be on welfare for the rest of our lives...Which i'm not, but me and my b/f do have a medical card for her...We live with my grandparents, so we dont really have to spend much....We take her to the dr when she is sick, we bathe her, we feed her, ya kno all of the above...So i wouldnt call myself an irresponsible parent...When I first found out that I was pregnant, half of my family was like "I'll pay for your abortion." and I was like NO WAY...!! I told them that I was the one who had unprotected sex, so I was the one who was gonna take on the responsibilities....But ppl will look down on you alot, just dont let it get to you, or get into your way, cuz as long as you know your a good parent, then dont worry about those other ppl out there...Well Congratulations to you...! I hope I helped you out..!

Answer 10

I think people look down on us because they still see us as children. I think they want us to make a good life for ourselves and get good educations too; that way when we are older and more experienced in life issues on our own and more wose, then we have a better capability of raising children. We would also have maybe a stable relationship and income. I think they think we are immature and uncapable of teaching a child since we have not gone out in the world ourselves for too long. They also think that love is only puppy love. But I say F them and live your life. We are smart and we will do what we have to do.