My husband left a month ago, says he wants a divorce...Now I am left alone to take care of the bills(except child support), the children(5 and 2), college(full-time). Not to mention the house, Christmas, etc... All I wanna do is scream out "What about ME!!??"
I feel overwhelmed...any suggestions?
Oh, and he says the kids can't spend the night with him right now because they make the people he's bumming off of uncomfortable!
2006-12-05 04:26:07 · 9 answers · asked by Lisa Bee 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I feel for you. Divorce is stressful enough , without college and kids. Here is what i suggest...Go for counseling. Most communities have sliding scale or even FREE counseling services. Especially for women going thru divorce.
Contact a social service agency for referral. Or even some religious centers. (catholic charities is one. )
Now..schedule some alone time for yourself. Can you get any one at all (that you trust) to babysit? If so...have them babysit and you go to a movie or go to the mall or something.
Two hours alone can do wonders!
Also,,consider next semester going to part time status at school. You will be having court dates, etc...you need more time for yourself and the kids in this stressful time.
Best to you.
2006-12-05 04:30:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abso freakin lutely!!
Do you have any family around that cld take care of the kids for an hour or two just to give you a break?
Lower your standards! That may sound wierd, but you just can't do everything. Clean less. I mean, don't let things get gross, but don't worry about things being picture perfect, a little dirt never hurt anyone and no-one knows what's under the couch if you don't show them.
The kids are little enough that they won't have high expectations for xmas so just do the best you can. Get them what you can afford and cook a good meal and they'll be happy.
Talk to your tutors at College about what's going on at home and see if they can cut you some slack to take the pressure off.
Make sure your ex takes them out in the day on a *regular basis*. Not just when he feels like it. Remind him that kids need stability and seeing him regularly is part of that now. That gives you a little time to do your own stuff.
At the end of the day, when the kids are asleep, just stop sometimes. Look around and decide what really can't wait and do that and then just take some time for yourself.
Find little ways to reward yourself so you don't get too low. Promise yourself half an hour to read a book, or watch a tv show and don't break that promise.
Good Luck with everything!!
2006-12-05 04:41:27 · answer #2 · answered by Skidoo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think probably every woman in the world feels like this! We are the ones that hold the family together. We are the ones that do the housework, take care of the kids, catering to the husband, plus working a full time job!! I mean think about it. We do a lot! I think that it is very normal to feel overwhelmed!! You got to try and find a way to balance it all! It's hard but you can do it. Ask some family for some help, get a babysitter and get out of the house, figure out what needs to be done and what can be put off. These are just some suggestions! You have to find some "me time"! Even if it's just for a few minutes! I like to close my bathroom door turn on soft music and soak in the tub! It's very relaxing! Just find moments that you can be still and enjoy the silence! Good luck!
2006-12-05 04:54:46 · answer #3 · answered by faith 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do need some alone time. Going through a divorce is stressful. Now add 2 little kids, college and bills. Your ex is being selfish. Tell him he needs to take kids. He can take them over to a family members. He needs to step up to the plate and give you the time that you need.
2006-12-05 04:33:54 · answer #4 · answered by Denise G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh yes I do. I am having difficulty with an injury I sustained at work and am feeling really anxious because I want to get back to work and I can't because the doctors don't know where the pain is actually coming from. Scream into your pillow!!!
2006-12-05 04:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh God, yes. My mother and brother are both having medical problems right now, and I love helping them, but I'm in college too, plus I work. What about ME? LOL.
Just take deep breaths, go shopping if you can, call friends, and watch movies!
2006-12-05 04:28:00 · answer #6 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What helps me is thinking of people who have it way worse and are still happy. The me time will come one day I hope. What about me......???? I have 3 kids and full time job and never have time for anything...
2006-12-05 04:32:21 · answer #7 · answered by 2strongfor2long 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, What about ME!!??"
Me too, too many things to catch up and dont know where to start from..
Anyway, it's sad to know about your situation, it's kids of the same as mine.. but what to do huh! this is life that we the unlucky ones have to go thru all this bullshit in life...
Nevertheless, i'm still ALIVE and i want to SCREAM OUT LOUD too...
2006-12-05 09:55:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is good to yell sometimes, to vent out your frustration. Go up the hill or to the seaside and shout aloud. You will feel better!
2006-12-05 16:50:24 · answer #9 · answered by AH HA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋