Why are people so ignorant to say that gay or bi people chose to be that way?

Question

I'ts not a choice, they always have that attraction they just don't realize it. its a subconscious thing... is that why they say they "chose" it? cuz they finnaly realized?

Answer 1

It think it's ridiculous. I'm straight and I could never figure out why some people think gay people "choose" to be gay. With all the crap that gay people have to deal with why in the world would anyone "choose" to be gay? I didn't choose to be straight. It's just that when I started having sexual feelings my brain and body reacted sexually to men. The same thing happens to gay people except it's toward the same gender. There's no choice or control over it. It boggles my mind that some of these people don't get it.

Answer 2

well....being aware of your unexpected feeling for the same sex, yes it is a decision and a choice for someone to supress his/her feelings/instincts and play the straight throughout his/her entire life (if you deny sth long enough, some day it gets lost, it's about how you convince yourself, and how the conditions lead you) or to confess to her/himself and everybody else that he/she is gay.
Mine was an apparent selection between what "normally" had to be and what i felt inside..so i believe it is a matter of choice.
And as a counter question to yours, why are people so ignorant to say that believing you were made so is the only way to be a gay/bi ? You can control your subconscious (bc it wants and desires so many false things too) with your superego..so..there never is a unique way of explanation for something..try to understand people starting from my example, will u? I hope this has been a new point of view to the matter

Answer 3

To state that sexuality is a choice is an all-round ridiculous logic.

Why would an individual attempt to segregate themselves from the majority of a population consciously? A basic human desire is attachment and this is what is primarily sought for within one's life. To suggest that an individual would consciously choose to become a minority suggests a flaw in basic life-theory.

There is, however, a choice in whether to act upon ones basic emotions and desires. This is not related to paedophilia or murder in that this is homosexual sex is an act between two consenting adults. It's a conscious decision which has no direct negative affect upon the surrounding population.

You cannot state that you can choose or change your sexuality unless it is something that you have overcome personally. It's not easily proven.

Now comes the choice to act on one's desires... Should this be denied and one attempt to hide their feelings from those around. Should one marry without having any sexual attraction thereby affecting their partner in a completely negative way. Potentially causing the destruction of the partner's sexual perception and that of any potential offspring that may be brought into their lives.

Whereas one could act upon their desire with no negative correlation between that and those around them without suppressing their emotions and developing into a far healthier and open person.

There are negatives and positives here... and a lot of people in this thread have ignored the whole picture.

Answer 4

There's no proof whatsoever that being gay is "hard-wired" behavior. From my personal experience, I've watched a great many people make the decision to be with a same sex partner, then turn around and go back to an opposite sex partner. If it was "hard-wired" behavior, there wouldn't be such a choice to make; they'd be gay and that would be the end of it. As it is, I don't buy into the whole "no choice" thing. Sounds too much like rationalization.

Your sexuality is your business, but when you obnoxiously throw it in everyone else's faces to make some delusional "political statement", then said sexuality is nothing more than a tool to be used for leverage, and there's not one damn' thing subconscious abou that.

Answer 5

Because those people are ignorant and simply cannot (and/or will not) understand people who have different orientation from them.

Gay or bi people face so much difficulty after coming out of the closet that I'd long figured out that it's something they wouldn't choose if they had a choice about it. I don't see why other people can't just put aside their biases and pre-conceived notions and realise that too.

Answer 6

true, it's not a choice - you may be interested in some chapters from the book by Matt Ridley on the human genome (the second, not the first, but the title escapes me now.) And you may want to suggest the book also to all those who tell you that being gay or bi or straight is a choice.

BRENNO: quel proverbio non l'ho mai sentito, ma mi sembra saggio!

Answer 7

Would you take the same sort of logic to the sexual preference of a pedophile, a convicted rapist, or one who practices beastliest? If not, then why?

To say they someone is, "Born that way" eliminates ones accountability to God, society, and themselves. It is as if saying the person does not have the freedom of choice when it comes to their personal preference! One has a personal preference, because they voluntarily choose one thing or way over another.

Yes, I am a Born-Again Christian who believes in the Bible, and thinks that the "Alternate Lifestyle" of homosexuality and lesbianism is wrong. I won't go off on quoting scripture, because I know many do not carry the same belief on its inspiration on it as I do. But, let me say that I know many who have come to Christ who were once in such a lifestyle, and have now voluntarily chosen to forsake it, with no desire to ever want to return. They made a conscious choice for themselves about the subject, something they could not have done if they were just, "Born that way!".

Answer 8

Because they are ignorant. Look at their role models - peoplee like Pastor Ted Haggard, who condemns gays because of their lifestyle - but then secretly goes out and has a guy blow him while snorting meth... It SEEMS like a choice for them - they are closeted and CHOOSE to fake a marriage, so you must be faking your gayness like they fake their straightness.

Personally, I think it is ridiculous to beleive that an All Loving God would be concerned with what two consenting adults are getting up to in the privacy of their own homes....

Answer 9

Here in Italy we've got a saying which says:the mother of stupids is always pregnant.It means that there are and also will always be stupid people who say stupid things like the one you correctly mentioned

Answer 10

Because of their background and upbringing. They developed prejudices that shaped their latter beliefs. So now, they believe the only thing that they know... because they don't know differently.