Lets be friends - not!!?

Question

Have any of you ever gotten back successfully with your ex-girlfriend/boyfriend after you were dumped - on the basis you should "just be friends"? If so, how did it happen?

Answer 1

Happened a long time ago. Just reminded her of what she was missing.

Answer 2

Great Q, and I have no stats, but have an experience happening now.

I suspect the chances are increased the longer you know each other, though not in an immediate sense.

Example: I left and divorced my wife of 25 years in 1999. We remained in touch, albeit through pain and anger, and today we have returned to a civil, even subtly, friendly "Friends" basis. It could be the commonality suggests that's a good idea? We have 3 children, and have known each other since 1971.

I suspect too in the case of B/G friends, it may be that it wasn't a "deep" relationship, or long standing one?,,,Not that long term means blissful. We may just not have developed high levels of trust or deep interest? We may not have been able or willing to explore each others passions for all things to any real depth, or it may be that we aren't mature enough to accept, tolerate, compromise, and endure yet?

I can equate a breakup to the stages of Death and Dying.

Grief
Denial
Anger
AND eventual, hopeful, acceptance.

If you "care" for anyone, there are obvious reasons beyond just lust. If you can get beyond the reasons for the breakup, perhaps "Friends" can be a lifelong experience? AND I can't think of a better relationship than to LIKE someone I used to LOVE, or believed I loved. The same can be said for stable. long lasting relationships. Wouldn't it be logical to LIKE the one you LOVE, for the long term?

Steven Wolf

Answer 3

i don't think it can work somone will still have feelings for the other one and think there's a chance that the friendship will lead to getting back together. There's also that feeling that they have dumped you and didn't want you as a lover or a friend when you were together so why now? i haven't kept in touch with any of my ex's that's why they r ex-too much water under the bridge as they say!

Answer 4

The first ex-boyfriend I ever had tried that. We decided to go for coffee....one thing led to another....yada, yada, yada....needless to say we aren't friends anymore.
So I guess the only saving grace is that I have seen him recently (about 15 years later)he is a teacher at my niece and nephew's school. He is chubby and still lives at home with Mom and Dad.
HAHAHAHA!!!! I guess I got the last laugh!

Answer 5

I only split with my ex because she attacked me with a knife in front of a professional. I love her to this day.

if u were dumped it is a humiliation and i'm sorry to have to say it but if u weren't allowed a cooling off period, i.e. i would like a break then maybe he/she doesn't deserve u when they find they are feeling a bit lonely.

i don't like being used, either.

all the very best to u.

Answer 6

Never gotten back with them, ended up sleeping together, but I think it is possible as with some relationships it's been circumstance that split us up rather than changing feelings

Answer 7

if a boy ever dumped me, he never got a second chance. I have enough friends, I dont need ex boyfriends crowding up my phonebook!!

Answer 8

Nope. That's usually just an "easy" way to end a relationship.

Answer 9

Yep, twice, and both times it went belly up even worse than the original split.
You are exes for a reason..............

Answer 10

yes me and my husband been separate now for over 3 years now.and we are still best friends.