I have some friends and coworkers with whom I feel very comfortable and at ease. I feel connected to these people, like we are on the same page, despite being in different life stages or having different lifestyles.
I also have some friends and coworkers with whom I just don't feel like I can truly "click", despite seeing them every day and being (albeit superficially) friendly. Although some of these people and I are in similar life stages, I just can't feel a chemistry with them, although some of them seem to have chemistry with one another just fine.
Why is that?? What causes us to click with some people and not with others?
2006-12-05 03:25:07 · 7 answers · asked by kiki 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
I have thought of this many times myself. I get along well with older co-workers than with the ones my age. I think that people my age are immature and too judgmental. Older people have a wiseness to them and can see the goodness in me. I work really hard and have a good work ethic, something you don't see as much of from people my age (30+). I'm at the age where women have school-aged children and are getting divorced.
I have no children, I'm not married and I'm happy. Older people see this and understand that I'm still a good person. The ones my age seem to be angry about it and think that I haven't experienced life. That is why I work so hard and make them look bad, or so they think.
I gave up even trying to be superficially friendly to them because I either get a look or a snub, so why bother. I'm a decent person and they are too wound up in themselves to see it, I'm not going out of my way to make them see.
Talk to who you get along with and don't bother wasting your time with people who are not friendly. Talk to them when it is work related, but don't give attitude. Then they have nothing to go off of.
2006-12-05 03:48:29 · answer #1 · answered by moobiemuffin 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you answered your own question -
"I have some friends and coworkers with whom I feel very comfortable and at ease. I feel connected to these people, like we are on the same page, despite being in different life stages or having different lifestyles."
You are comfortable with them. Although, it is good to get to know some people that you don't automatically click with, you never know what you might learn about them and yourself!:)
2006-12-05 03:31:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Here's why i think this happens:
1. As u said, u feel comfortable with certain people
2. Sometimes, people who are a bit like u are easy to make friends with. I mean, u can easily do stuff together, u agree in ur viewpoints, u share common interests... u get lots to talk about
3. because u share viewpoints, u can see things in the same light. U can agree on stuff and, u know, unite against common enemies or during arguments. This makes u feel u understand each other well.
2006-12-05 03:43:32 · answer #3 · answered by nauts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Similarity for me. I barley have any friends and chose for it to be that way because of my lifestyle and the contrast between others my age and myself. Im very mature for my age and interested in family, love, the real things that life should evolve around. Not dooney and burke purses and wild parties. I prefer to have friends who are like me. And when I meet those who are like me, I can feel it and Im a great observer I can tell how people are after a conversation that last for 5 minutes :) I really dont click with people who evolve their lives around material things, dont give family or people of importance in their lives much value, worry about reputations as if they were going to DIE if they didnt, etc. Why dont I click with them? Simply because I am the opposite. you see?
2006-12-07 13:27:37 · answer #4 · answered by Fearfully & wonderfully made 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its all about like and dislikes - you may be friends with someone and enjoy his/her company, but they may talk too much or say the wrong things, or do any number of things that go against your conscious or subconscious standard of enjoyable to some degree or another... others may do or say things (however big or insignificant) that we do find pleasing to some degree or another to our conscious or subconscious standard of enjoyable
Now this leads you into the great debate of Nature vs. Nurture - which has had more influence in developing your individual standard of enjoyable? The world may never know.
2006-12-05 08:21:43 · answer #5 · answered by shomaliatimalla 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be careful, sometimes it's about making judgements. We are raised to distrust certain people. Sometimes it's for self-preservation, but sometimes it can be unfair. My parents were very opinionated and judgemental, and as a result, I always have to fight the inclination to label people.
2006-12-05 03:36:44 · answer #6 · answered by Kacky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have wondered about that myself.I really cant answer you but I do think about that a lot .Why is it like that .For example a woman who does not have children can get along really well with a woman who has no children .Or a man who likes sports can get along really well with a man who doesn't like sports .
2006-12-05 03:52:40 · answer #7 · answered by ©smegma 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋