For ur information he's very faithful and we don't intent to betray his wife. I told him to respect his wife and try his best to have a happy life. He wishes the same for me and wants me to go ahead with my life with some1 else in the near future. Moreover, he wants me to meet his wife and get to know her as some of u r suggesting. But I refused because I am not that strong and I might break down in front of them. Plus I'll feel the loss more seeing them together. So I am definitely not going to meet his wife. How can I when we've been dreaming of a life together and suddenly I'm left alone. BTW, he knows that I'm not happy abt his choices. He was my first bf and I'm afraid he might be the last cos I'm not the sort of person who opens up to ppl. It took him 1 year plus patience to get thro the wall I had built around my emotions and now the wall is higher this time.
2006-12-05 02:15:14 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
will if he is faithful, he will not make the effort of 1 year to get to know you. Anyway since the choice have been make, guess you should move on. I know saying is eariler than done. But any other choice ? You must be someone really wonderful that he make that great an effort. Go on meet some friends, I believe you will discover a whole new world. Take your time, I believe you would not like to make him sad for not being to live a better life. Right ??
ALL THE BEST !! YOU CAN MAKE IT !!
2006-12-05 02:24:40 · answer #1 · answered by blurblur 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you weren't the type of person to open up to people you wouldn't tell the world about the love you still feel for him. Even though you say and he says that he would never betray his wife...you are still a boulder in his road...and so is he to yours. It's better to move on and you're doing good by not answering his phone calls. He's a married man now and the only way you can get past this love is if you try to accept that you CAN move on. I can't understand why he would marry someone his parents wanted him to marry. Marriage is such a big step and such a committed thing that I have to say HE MUST feel something for this woman. You have to be open minded and whether you want to believe it or not...being friends with him...won't help you get over him any faster than it would to just try to move on. Do the things you love to do instead of thinking of him and his wife. It's okay to think of him all the time...but try to think less and less every day by doing the things you love. For your own sake...you have to trust the fact that there is someone else for you. I hope my adivice was somewhat helpful. Good luck and Take Care. .
2006-12-05 02:50:45 · answer #2 · answered by ForeignTerritory 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has no right to expect you to stay in his life. And how insensitive of him to expect you to meet and get to know his wife. At this point, you may not physically be unfaithful to his wife or intend to, but the temptation will be there and a thought is as good as a deed. He can't have his cake and eat it too.
You should tell him to quit calling you and to leave you to get on with your life. He made his choice for whatever reasons and now he, and you, have to live with it.
You don't need the grief and reminder and it will be almost impossible for you to find someone new to love if you're in his life. It's hard enough to find a good man and let your guard down without him mucking up your life.
By the by, your first boyfriend is not necessarily the best man for you.
Good luck to you :)
2006-12-05 02:25:06 · answer #3 · answered by parsonsel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK, so I haven't read the first part of your question. You need to do three things:
1. Go for counseling, so you can be emotionally healthy for a future relationship. Plus you will pick better people to date later.
2. If it's done, it's done. He says it's over, so cut all ties. It will be difficult for you. Find other (healhy) things to do. Take walks, work out, go the movies, get a new haircut,etc. Don't drink or do drugs.
3. You say he was your first boyfriend and he was married. I sense two things from this - low self esteem on your side and he took advantage of this on his side. I'm not saying this to be cruel. You should get some help from a counselor so you are not taken advantage of again - that's what happpened in this relationship, whether you know it at this moment in time or not.
2006-12-05 02:21:43 · answer #4 · answered by splatz 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to end it all, just have no contact with this person. Seeing his wife is bad idea and I am glad that you realise it also, so say good bye wish him and the family well, but cut it out no greeting at any Holiday no verbal written or visual contact of any kind.
Get busy with your routines, go for long walks to clear your mind, enjoy what you can, be wise for it. Write it of as good experience in your life while the rid lasted, cherish it if you want.
After few months or even a year try this site if needed and you are 25 years of age.
http://yahoo.shaadi.com/
2006-12-05 02:55:37 · answer #5 · answered by minootoo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its rough, but you have to accept that he choose her, not you,,, of course you dont want or need to meet his wife! you need to move on,, not talk to him,,,,, accept what choice he made....... be respectful of yourself and his new wife and even him,,, by walking totally away from the situation,,,,,,, the first boyfriend is always a hard one to get over, and its not helped by the fact that he doesnt seem mature enough to totally end it,,,,,,,but you will find another,, he will not be the last,,,,,, accept that your hurting,,,, if you were not it would of meant you didnt deeply care,,,,,,, but you can hurt and not need to see/talk to him,,,,,,,,
you say that there would of been consequences if he hadnt chosen his wife to marry? do you mean his family would of killed him???? if not, then there is no other consequence that would cause a man who loves you to marry someone else,,,,,,,you deserve a true love, who would be with you no matter what,,, and he isnt it
2006-12-05 02:22:39 · answer #6 · answered by dlin333 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some thing happened to me , i was the husband, i had to move from where i was living with my family to get over it and it took years but i did it for everyone else not for me and that caused my sufferings, i could never see the person again because i dont think the love for that person would ever go away
2006-12-05 02:21:06 · answer #7 · answered by gazooks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U comprehend u fairly could end all touch with this guy. U can do this 2 approaches the two substitute ur telephone variety and flow on or manage to connect up one final time and say so long appropriate. i could choose for selection 2 becoz a minimum of u could have some closure. Its gonna be troublesome yet u can do it. it ought to break him and u comprehend its def gonna harm u hunny yet u gets via it x
2016-10-04 21:54:12 · answer #8 · answered by kuhlmann 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋