Why do some men evade paying their child support? Is it because they don't love their kids? Or is it because they hate the mothers of their kids so much that they'd be willing to punish the child just to get back at the mom?
2006-12-05 01:23:48 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I beleive, from my own experience, it is mainly because they feel they are giving the ex money and not the child... I look at it this way, I pay the bills regardless if the asshole pays or not, so if I get a child support check, if I need to put gas in the car to get to work I will... My sons dad is an alcoholic as well, so he feels he needs to buy his alcohol first.. He has even made comments to me that he isnt giving "me" any money.. He just doesnt realize that the money he gives also provides a roof over his childs head.. He thinks I just blow it on whatever, but he is badly mistaken...
2006-12-05 01:30:09 · answer #1 · answered by Indymom 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all it’s just not “Dads” who are deadbeats! There is a baseline problem with child support with either parent because the parent who is paying child support has no idea where the money is going because the other parent doesn't have to accountable for it. Then there is the other issue of one parent using the children as pawns to control the other parent whether it is not allowing the children to have a real relationship with the other parent or not paying the child support because of not seeing the children when scheduled. Since divorce is a highly emotional charged issue it’s the kids who suffer due to this poor structured system. The courts can not use only numbers to determine what is best for the children but to look at the situation because each is so very difference. The courts should adopt the policy of "Shared Parenting” and instead of making one parent a slave to the other. If the courts assign parenting coordinators to help the parents work out a reasonable parenting schedules and needs of the children first. As a personal note as soon as the temporary orders were issued and child support was order my ex went out within a week purchased a brand new 4X4 truck with all the bells and whistles and the payment match my child support order within 45.00 dollars per month so I know what my child support is going to and it is not going to my children!
2006-12-05 11:54:36 · answer #2 · answered by chancesare45 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it is because they are just very selfish individuals and they simply do not care about anyone but themselves. In some cases some fall upon hard times, this is understandable to fall behind. However, the men and women who owe child support and never make an attempt to maintain financial support for their children and then have the nerve to bring more children into the world are very selfish and self centered. Perhaps even a little dumb and senseless. just my opinion. God bless****
2006-12-05 09:34:09 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Would you be happy paying for a car you were only allowed to drive once a week? Would you be happy paying for a house that someone else lived in? That's the logic behind dead-beat dads. They figure why pay childsupport if I only see my kid once a week? They think it's not fair. They don't stop to think about how it affects the children. They also don't stop to think about the needs of their children. However, a lot of the so-called dead-beat dads became father's without their consent. A woman has an option for abortion. She also has the option of taking birth control. But she can pretend to take the pill, and trick you into getting her pregnant. And while you did not consent to becoming a father, you are forced to pay support for that child. All the way around, the women hold most of the power in that. I think it's terrible. You can't force a woman to have an abortion, and yet you can force a man to be a father.
2006-12-05 09:33:40 · answer #4 · answered by kari w 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
okay i might be starting something but i have been a child on both sides so here i go .......i have a dad who worked so hard and did pay but we as kids did not get it because my mom found other things to do with it and as we got older she still didn't do anything for us so my dad stopped witch wasn't right but i understood later when we talked about it .........now i am a mom and have a stepson and the way i look at it we do not get to see him or even have a part in his life because of the step dad so i feel why should we pay for a child we do not get to see or have anything with him .......and on top of it the mother is a drug addict and has left them and god only knows but we can not get him and the state kept giving him back so what do we do as parents to a child for one who don't be long to us and for two the state will not help us...........
2006-12-05 09:45:33 · answer #5 · answered by missy 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It could be they don't love the kids, it could be they are trying to get back at the mother.
In cases where a guy has fathered multiple children with multiple women, he doesn't care and he has no self respect. The little head is doing all his thinking. In those cases all we can hope for is the little head shrivels up, falls off, and dies.
2006-12-05 09:27:40 · answer #6 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes. If they loved their kids more then they hated the mom or loved their new life they would pay. They would remember that although they are not a husband that they are still a father.
2006-12-05 09:39:45 · answer #7 · answered by JB 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Generally, it is due to lack of money. It would be like trying to live two households for the same money. It is not right .though, and men should support theur children, regardless.
2006-12-05 09:34:00 · answer #8 · answered by dominicaquilino 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I choose the latter. Either that, or the dads know nothing about responsibility. Selfishness could also be a factor.
2006-12-05 09:27:00 · answer #9 · answered by melcar12345 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some men avoid support because they are scum.
To have children and not support them is patently wrong.
2006-12-05 09:56:30 · answer #10 · answered by Flagger 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋