My husband will agree to have a third child but is asking me to compromise on the length of time I nurse the baby. His complaint is that he doesn't get enough attention from me and my sex drive is low while I am pregnant and nursing. I have very strong beliefs about nursing a baby as long as I feel they need it. Not just nutritionally, but emotionally too. I nursed my 1st baby for 18 months and my 2nd for 2 years, because she was more needy. My husband says it's fair to ask me to wean the baby by a year if we have a third child. If the baby is ready at a year, I'm fine to stop then, but I don't want to commit to that in advance. Is this a fair compromise?
2006-12-04 18:46:33 · 6 answers · asked by MountainChick 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not really. He shouldn't have a say about how long you can nurse the child unless the child is over 3 then that is wierd.
Look at it this way, when your little one is a year old and still wants to nurse, what is he going to do about it? Its not like he can take having the child back. Plus you'll have doctors to back up you about nursing.
2006-12-04 18:51:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I truly do not feel that a question like this should be answered by anybody except you and your husband. You have your ways, and raise your babies a certain way, so how could you go against your self beliefs. Your husbands needs are understand able, but the needs of your children are very important. So, I guess it's up to you in "giving" your husband what he needs more while you are breast feeding. Good luck!!
2006-12-05 02:57:15 · answer #2 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HIs concerns about being "left out" or placed behind the child are valid and should be taken very seriously.
This is who you have to live with for decades after the children grow up and leave, so it's in the childrens best interest if you can model for them a happy and healthy marriage.
Putting the husbands needs after the children does not model this for the children and his concern about not getting enough attention leads me to believe he comes after the children in your priorities.
Both have to be taken care of, but he should come first, just like you should be first with him.
I would negotiate that point, that each of you comes first with the other, and each of you gets to spell out what that looks like to you.
I think that is far better than negotiating the time spent nursing.
If he feels first in your book, I doubt he'd really care how long you were nursing the child.
2006-12-05 02:52:14 · answer #3 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I don't think it is up to him however most children that are bottle feed stop getting formula at a year old and go to regular milk so i do not think its so far fetched to expect you to stop nursing a child at that age. Personally my 2 came off the bottle at a year old. i never understood having a child breast feed after it has teeth thats just strange to me
2006-12-05 03:35:16 · answer #4 · answered by Amy M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Promise to jump start your sex drive even if you are still nursing and he'll have nothing to complain about.
2006-12-05 03:20:08 · answer #5 · answered by lol_des 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 years is a little long, and not necessary.
2006-12-05 03:00:53 · answer #6 · answered by EllisFan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋