First issue was 5 years ago when my husband hit me three times on three different occasional, and I did hit him once after the thrid time he hit me. He has not done it since. How do you think we can move on pass this issue?
2006-12-04 16:40:09 · 21 answers · asked by Mr & Mrs Allgood 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would suggest a dab of marriage counseling or a class on domestic violence for both of you.
You both need to take your anger out in other ways other than on each other. Maybe you can buy a punching bag, I don't know. But domestic violence leaves a permanent scar that cannot be removed. It also stays permanently on your record.
Do something about it NOW!
2006-12-04 16:45:19 · answer #1 · answered by correcaminos72734 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That is your first issue - that he hit you 5 years ago? What is your second issue? If it is verbal abuse you can go to a marriage counselor to try and find a way of communicating without bashing each other, verbally or physically. If he won't go to a counselor with you, go alone. Obviously you need to move past the issue of him hitting you 5 years ago but it doesn't sound like you have. It does seem like you have other issues that you need to deal with, so get going. Ask yourself if you are better off with him or without him?
2006-12-04 16:48:06 · answer #2 · answered by Canuckgirl 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sit with him and discuss your concern. Let bygones be bygones.Promise each other that you both wont do things that hurt each other and just completely forget about the past and start new happy married life.Show your confidence in him and gain his trust. Nobody can solve issues between a couple expect they themselves help eachother to get out of the ditch.
All i can say is may god bless you and all the best for your bright future.
2006-12-04 17:06:24 · answer #3 · answered by hard_2forget 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Physically sounds like you have moved on, but not emotionally.
The first step that you need to take as a couple is admitt how wrong and hurtful this was, not only physically but mentally.
The second step, let eachother know that this something that you do not want to happen again.
If you feel that you are unable to do it alone, see a counsler not a psychologist, a counsler. They should help you move on.
If you two want to change it, you will. Its only up to you two no one else.
Good luck
2006-12-04 17:31:34 · answer #4 · answered by Barb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its sounds as though you may need some marriage councelling. Hitting each other solves nothing and breeds contempt. Talk to your church or doctor about were you can go for help. You need to find a better way to relate to each other and were your problems lie.If this isn,t someone you feel comfortable talking to , try calling a crisis centre . They are usually in the phone book. Good luck, it takes time.
2006-12-04 16:49:59 · answer #5 · answered by mcnallys lost child 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Counseling is a must!!!! I really don't want to be the one to tell you to leave your husband but you need to think of your safety first! It is very important that he gets the help he needs before you can move on. You also need to attend counseling with him so you can get to the bottom of why he is so angry and why he feels the need to hit you.
Always remember that there is no reason why this man has a right to put his hands on you. NO REASON AT ALL! I don't care if you called him every name in the book, stopped having sex with him and everything else. There is no excuse. And most importantly, love yourself enough to want better.
Good luck with everything!
2006-12-04 16:45:54 · answer #6 · answered by No Perm 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why are you worrying about this now? Seems to me as though you should have been excited about it 5 years ago. What are the other problems that are interfering in your marriage? Let it all out and get some professional mediation.
2006-12-04 16:59:03 · answer #7 · answered by svcouple7677 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Considering this is a true statement. Both of you need some anger management and relationship counseling. For some reason somewhere down the line both of you have lost respect for one another. And thought it OK to slap the heck out of each other. Very unhealthily. Good luck and God bless****
2006-12-04 16:50:09 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it is important that you both work on your communication. Lashing out against your spouse can be a result of the lack of good communication. The violence may have taken place a while ago, but you cannot pretend it didn't happen, so it is important that you both recognize that it happened and work to fix the problem together
2006-12-04 16:48:20 · answer #9 · answered by elcidiv 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You've moved on since then. If both of you can forget the past and forgive each other, then I don't see any problem. Learn to respect each other for what you are and don't have too many expectations. Life will be a breeze.
2006-12-04 16:46:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋