So if I do see a psychologist, what are they going to help me with?

Question

I think I might be able to get some benefit from seeing a counselor or pyschologist, but at the same time I feel like why do I need somebody else to tell me whats wrong with me, why can't I just see whats wrong and change myself?

But anyways, I have godawful ADD, was molested when I was a kid which has affected my relationships lately, and I'm thinking what's going to a counselor gonna help me with these issues?

Answer 1

Well, they will prescribe you some medicines.

Answer 2

A counselor isn't necessarily the same thing as a psychologist, first of all (You said counselor or psychologist at first, but then changed to "whats going ot a counselor gonna help me..." so I figured I'd clarify).

Secondly, if you could just see whats wrong with yourself and fix it, wouldnt you have done it already?

Third - you need to rule out any medical issues that might be related to your problems, so a psychologist might recommend you to a psychiatrist, who may or may not order blood work. Also, many many many psychological problems aren't a matter of "oh, i'm sad, I should read about puppies and make myself happy" - They're the product of a chemical imbalance, usually a lack or abundance of serotonin (a neurotransmitter), that you have absolutely NO control over- no matter how hard you try to fix yourself.

While these issues might apply to your ADD, theyre probably not the case with the molestation issues - however, you probably don't know how to deal with molestation problems, or you wouldn't have any - and a psychologist can help you realize what the problem is, possibly get you in touch with a psychiatrist that can prescribe antidepressants if you need them, and if not, can at least give you the tools you need to move on in your life and put this behind you. You will have to cooperate and make an effort yourself though, they aren't magicians.

The human mind is a very complicated thing, just because you have one doesn't mean you know how it works or know how to fix everything - you could even say its the same reason why you can't know you have cancer, and then fix it yourself - these people are trained to do this - and it takes ALOT of schooling (4 years for a Bachelors plus 7 years grad for most clinical psych Ph.D programs)

If these things don't help, some people just need someone to talk to - which probably sucks if you're going to pay 80 dollars an hour to figure it out, but oh well.

Answer 3

The point to going to a counselor is to get someone else's take on things. Often we are so embroiled in our own lives we miss the obvious or other solutions. A counselor can give you a fresh look at your problems, some ways to deal with your troubles that you haven't heard of or thought of. A counselor can support you, back you, when you choose a healthy direction.

A counselor, a good one won't tell you what is WRONG with you. What is wrong is hardly the issue. Most of us are well aware of what is wrong with us. The issue is how to get right. How to improve your life. We, all of us, from time to time get stuck in emotional ruts. A little help getting gout of the rut.

Just a little food for thought. The number of people who were molested when they were young is astounding! Not to down play the trauma of it but you have plenty of company. The problem today is not the fact of the molestation but how to live and move on. How to really put it behind you. A counselor will be able to give you some suggestions on that.

Answer 4

Well, I don't think that a psychologist or counsellor would help you solve your problems, or issues. That's up to you to make those changes. A therapist on any level is there only to help you find the answers you need to help yourself, and they also provide you with the tools you need to succeed, and find strength in opening up, and discovering a new meaning to your life.
Having a history such as yours, with what you went through, is a good enough reason to have a professional there, to help you find the answers you already may have, hidden, inside you.
Sometimes we can't find those solutions to our problems, until we have a professional come in and ask the right questions for us to 'see' in front of us, what we need to answer.
You may not feel that a complete stranger can help you resolve these issues, however, they are professionals for a reason. They know what they're doing and they are good at what they do.
Trust me, I've been there, done that, and experienced a similar background, and I'm grateful, every day, that I was able to obtain the tools I did, through counselling, to move on with my life, and gain some much deserved healing and answers that I knew I had, in me. I just needed someone to ask the right questions and be there to hear me out. Sometimes I felt like I needed to hear myself talk out loud, about what was troubling me, and hear myself say those words. It was then that the questions I had, buried in me, were the doorways to the answers the counsellor helped bring out, into the open, through my own solutions.

Answer 5

I don't have ADD but i was molested as a child as well and yes it does have an effect on relationships and how you see yourself. Going to counselor is an individual experience for me I was elated to just get it out in the open they are able to take ques from things you say to get to the root of your problem. they don't judge they just listen and give you the tools to cope and move on with your life. And take it from me when you forgive the person that molested you and you feel okay about it the grass will be greener and the sky bluer.

Answer 6

What a psychologist should do is listen to your problems. It isn't their role to tell you what to do, or to sit there and tell you what is 'wrong' with you. If a psychologist does that, they're not a good psychologist.

Perhaps the best thing a psychologist can do is to help you to clarify things for yourself, and to support you as you try to deal with your problems. Sometimes this can involve doing cognitive therapy - which is helping you to recognise and challenge negative automatic thoughts.

Seeing a psychologist really isn't about getting someone to tell you what is wrong with yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else can - after all, you live with yourself 24/7. It can be helpful to get a bit of an outside perspective, but no decent psychologist is going to sit there and tell you how to live your life - not unless you ask them to do so. Even then, decent psychs only give practical advice, such as for example how to treat insomnia via sleep restriction therapies.

There are a number of therapeutic approaches that a psychologist could try with you, depending on what they feel is appropriate. The first thing they're likely to do is to let you talk about how you're feeling. Please note that they won't force you to talk about details unless you want to talk about them, and a decent psych should pay attention to the issues that you consider important, not what they consider important.
I personally like the more cognitive approaches within psychology - for example, cognitive behaviour therapy can be useful for a range of psychological issues.
It isn't about dwelling constantly on how aspects of your childhood left you feeling damaged since the past is the past and you can't change it. It tends to focuss on the things that you can change, which can be quite empowering! And because the abuse is affecting how you interact with other people in the present, it's something you can change, although I imagine it is probably not going to be easy.

If you are feeling sad/depressed, there is of course a chemical imbalance, but you do have some ability to control this in many cases. (What are out emotions but the chemicals within our brain, after all).

@lucky - no they won't prescribe medication. Psychologists and counsellors are not medical doctors.

Answer 7

I think that seeing a professional is like having a massage for your brain. It works out the knots and I've always walked away with that light feeling like after a massage. Also, they can give you a different perspective on things. Often we try to work problems out the same way for our whole lives because it worked one time, without taking into account that we have changed since then. It helps to see yourself differently because you are, obviously, looking at yourself very up close, sometimes without seeing the bigger picture.

Answer 8

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Answer 9

if you could sort yourself out you would have done it by now,
many people can sort them selves out
but those who cannot may need a translator of mental mechanics ,to help them in the right direction.
you sound like one of those.
almost everybody has been molested as a kid
most get over it with out any problems
it is a very usual occurrence and usually by relatives or family.

Answer 10

They're good if you don't have anyone to talk to and need to vent and get it all out in the open. If you already know someone you feel comfortable talking to, then I wouldn't bother going. But then again thats just my opinion.

I went throught MANY therapy sessions and never heard anything I didn't already know.

Answer 11

Do you expect anything from it? Healing, closure? If the answer is yes, it will help. Have an open mind, no man is an island, we need professional sometimes. What are you going to loose?