What do you do when your husband's sex is horrible!!!!!!?

Question

I have been with my hubby for 10 years now. At first sex was good, then lately it has been weaker than ever! I tried everything, I actually participate!!! Sex dosen't last no longer than 5 minutes, and I don't feel it anymore! The bad thing about it is he don't care about lasting 5 minutes. It is not his age because he is not even close to 30 yet. Is it me? I am fit, clean, confident and sexy!!! I know I got it going on! I tried everything I could and I am getting tired. I tell him and he shruggs his shoulders like it dosen't matter to him. What to do?????

Answer 1

you need to talk to him about it. maybe see a counselor. if he doesn't care about it then stop having sex, maybe he will try harder.

Answer 2

i think you should try some new ideas. Possibly some toys? Communicating is the key. Let him know how turned on he makes you, while at the same time how yuo crave the way things were. Introducing some toys may excite him, especially if you let him se them with you before he achieves his goal. Find ut if there are some things he'd like to try that are o.k. with you and give it a whirl!! Believe me I'd give an arm (o.k. maybe just a finger) to have my wife interested even a little in trying to get the romance back. I would be happier to have her tell me she was unhappy or not having an "o" during the act. I'd also want her to tell me what would help.
Good luck...marriage is tough, especially as the years go by! Sometimes I feel like its passing me by!!

Answer 3

I agree with the poster that said this:

(1) Bring some porn into the bedroom.
(2) Have a stripper pole installed in your bedroom.
(3) Start investing in sex toys that will make intimacy more interesting
(4) If you don't, talk dirty.
(5) Fake orgasms - get really into it.
(6) Thinking out of the box is not only healthy - your efforts will be rewarded.

I don't know about faking orgasms though. You should try to give him head as often as possible. Try new positions as well.

Answer 4

Stop trying so hard. Yep when you make it an issue, that is when it becomes a problem. He may be feeling pressure to satisfy you instead of relaxing and enjoy the moment. You might have to sacrifice how you feel to give him some time. Talk to him about what you like but don't force the issue. When you force sex that is when it goes from bad to worse. You have to pick your moments and work on his mind because yes it is true, sex is 90% mental and 10% physical. Get into his head and he'll getcha in the bed.

Answer 5

(1) Bring some porn into the bedroom.
(2) Have a stripper pole installed in your bedroom.
(3) Start investing in sex toys that will make intimacy more interesting
(4) If you don't, talk dirty and try a variety of positions.
(5) Fake orgasms - get really into it.
(6) Thinking out of the box is not only healthy - your efforts may be rewarded.

Answer 6

It could be one of a couple things.

He may just be bored - if so, try seducing him somewhere in public, or do something else sexy and surprising.

However, you must be careful - he may have found another outlet for his satisfaction. At the very least, he's showing you that he doesn't care for you the way he once did.

If the seduction doesn't work, you need to get him to open up and talk about it. If not, you need to take him with you to see a marriage counselor.

Good luck!

Answer 7

It's a very hard question! I could tell you several advices but to desist.

Try to talk to him about it, telling that women like to have 3 turns of sex, the first: only kisses; the second all body touched by his hands and the third a real and full sexy.

Ask him if He feel like watching you making sex alone, this is a great inspiration to us!

Answer 8

I would find someone else. If he showed an interest in trying to work on it then I say hang in there, but he has total disregard for the marriage and women put up enough with men but bad sorry sex is the end of the line.

Answer 9

There are a number of reasons a person might lack sexual desire for their spouse. There are, relation and physical problems that can affect sexual desire too. The following list can be used to identify problems or potential problems.
Poor self image, poor sexual self image, inhibitions.
Fear of intimacy, men may fear intimacy because they think it's "weak" or unmanly.
Childhood sexual abuse, molestation, rape, people abused before repress their sexual drive.
Guilt from (false or genuine) sexual sin - guilt over masturbation, playing doctor, promiscuity.
Busyness, stress, anxiety.
depression - depression puts the skids on everything in your life, including sex drive.
Unforgiving, deep grief, bitterness, fear, anger, hate - strong negative emotions steal emotional energy from the rest of your life. These emotions don't even have to be directed toward the spouse to sex drive.

Answer 10

Make him get you off before the sex even starts so it won't matter how long it takes. Or you could tie him down and use him how you see fit. Give him a break if he's too excited. Use toys. Be creative.

Answer 11

Go to a sex doctor, they really help. You could use sex toys, you could try to seduce him in a whole different way. Maybe when you're in the car together grab his part and make sexy movements and tell him really soft in his ear how he turns you on and how hot he is and that you want to have sex right now... I don't know, experience new things! It's always fun and you could get wonderful results.