I'm no longer in a relationship. I love this person, but he has decided that he's not the right person for me. I was not ready to hear that, because I thought we were on a path of resolving our issues. What's so bad, I'm hoping he will call and we can talk about how we can make things right. I guess I'm in a state of confusion. One part of me says, continue moving forward accept how things are & another part is telling me it might be worth trying to resolve out problems. At the moment, I'm not taking any of his calls until I have a clear mind. I guess I know the answer, trying to hold on to something that is already broke. I guess I trying to put something together that God has already seperated.
1. It hurts, but how do I move past this situation? Any ideas on what to do during the process?
2006-12-04 10:24:40 · 16 answers · asked by gingerpeach 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sorry to hear you are hurting. Take care of yourself right now. Eat properly, go for a walk and make sure you get a good night's sleep. Talking about it might help. If you don't have a friend you feel you can confide in then call one of those help lines. Sometimes just getting it off your chest helps. It doesn't sound like it was a terrific relationship so perhaps you are better off without him. Get back to knowing yourself and who you are. A partner is supposed to make your life better, not worse. You don't have to hate him but distancing yourself for a while will make it easier. Good luck =)
2006-12-04 10:31:02 · answer #1 · answered by sticky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I remember correctly, watching the movie "Legally Blonde" made me feel a bit better when I was feeling the way you are feeling now.
Another thing to do is make a list of all the things you really want in a man. If you're honest, this guy probably won't measure up.
Sometimes the person whose been broken up with will spend too much time analysing themselves to try to figure out what's wrong with them, or what they could have changed for the relationship to have worked. There is a time and place for that, but it's not when your heart is breaking. Turn your microscope on him instead.
All the best, and I hope you will soon find someone who will be good to you, and who you can just be yourself with and "play" with.
2006-12-04 18:47:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, we're in the same boat. And I don't even know the reason.
The past month, it's been going downhill, so I'm assuming he's not in love with me anymore. But I have to work with him, in a diner, and everyone thinks he's just the nicest guy (which I used to think, now I know differently.) It totally sucks, and hurts like hell, and I just wish we could talk so I know what exactly his problem is. And I can't even cry right now because I'm so pissed off. And confused. I did nothing wrong. He's such an ***. Three freakin weeks before Christmas!!
If I were you, I wouldn't take his calls at all. Sometimes they go back to you out of pity, even if they don't really want to, and you don't want that. The same crap will happen again, and it's just too hard. Ignore him. Good luck, hon.
2006-12-04 19:47:46 · answer #3 · answered by deb 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You said... he said he is not the right person for you. WOW! This is hitting home. Just today I told my boyfriend the same thing. I feel SICK!!! absolutely SICK about it. I love him and we are different. But, I know he loves me too and was shocked by what I said earlier. I've been sitting here wishing he would call ME and tell me that I AM the right person for him. I'm not ready to let him go just yet. I was feeling hurt and confused and because I love him so much I thought that I would be being kind to let him go. And I may have been but I wish he would call me and tell me everything is ok and that he wants to work on our relationship. Maybe you should try calling him. Let him know that you aren't so sure that he's not the right person for you. Hopefully it will all work out for you. I'll be praying for a happy ending and please do the same for me.
2006-12-04 18:43:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So many people have many different ways to mend a broken heart. Mine for instance is going on the rebound and finding a whole bunch of new guys. I have realized that hurts me worse so I have stopped and found the best way to get over my problems. But I think the best thing for you is to find your own way. I learned that is the best thing to do because then you learn more about yourself and learn fo later. The best things learned are learned through experiance. So find a way experiment on what makes you feel better. Also stay colse to your friends and they can help through the toughest times. Thats all Im gonna say cause you need to find out for yourself what can help you cause you know yourself best.
2006-12-04 18:31:30 · answer #5 · answered by Ashley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he used a backwards way of breaking up with you by saying something like "I'm not right for you", and while trying to be nice, inadvertently made things alot harder for you because now you feel like maybe things are salvageable. Here's the thing: if he broke up with you, he's got to be the one at this point to prove to you that he wants to be together again. All you should worry about is whether or not you feel better, and how to pick yourself up and feel good again. If the relationship needed fixing, he's the one who bailed on your hard work - he's got to prove to you that he's willing to work on it again, you don't have anything to prove to him... you were trying to do the work. He might figure out he's missed a good thing, and if he makes an effort later, and you believe him, go for it. But don't you go out of your way to fix your relationship or fix yourself FOR him. Fix yourself for you!
2006-12-04 18:32:09 · answer #6 · answered by starlet_8 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont take any of his phone calls!!! And the only thing thats gonna help honestly is to cry until you can cry nomore...then the anger will set in after the hurt,,,,and will be thinking what the hell was i thinking going out with him anyways,,,,You will be mad and want no contact from him,,,then maybe later on down the road you will be friends with him when you find it in your heart to forgive him. Thats usually the way it goes.
2006-12-04 18:29:42 · answer #7 · answered by michelle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u want to move one then just take a break and go somewhere or do something that will take your mind off of it and move on. If u still want to be with him then awnser his phone calls talk it out, I mean u did say u were confused right?
2006-12-04 18:28:54 · answer #8 · answered by americangurl92 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
youre already doin the rite thing by taking a timeout to stand still and just think. of course it hard. who said it would be easy. and i dont no if u believe in god and the fact that god does not make mistakes but if u do then u must also realize that nothing in ur life happens by mistake
2006-12-04 18:28:48 · answer #9 · answered by Ken R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, i am going through this right now too, but he is not calling me. any communication from him comes in the form of yelling. friends and family say he is so mad with himself that he is making me out to be the bad one. anywho. i had to just drudge through the pain and hurt. it didnt take me as long as i thought it would to move past his immaturity and stupidity. and i, unlike him, did not go find someone to get over the pain with. i feel i made a wise decision in that. good luck.
2006-12-04 18:30:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋