long overdue, I cant seem to move on until I complete this task, I've lived with the same woman for the last 17 years and just cant commit, just cant seem to find contentment...
2006-12-04 09:20:16 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would say after 20 years of harboring this its not an apology you need to give your ex-wife, but one you owe to the poor women who has stuck by you for the past 17 years while you couldn't commit to her because you couldn't/wouldn't commit to her because you couldn't let go.
And after you complete that task. Get out the yellow pages and find your self a therapist. There is nothing wrong in talking with someone and it really seems to be that you need someone to help you sort out your feelings.
I mean its nice and all you want to do right but its time to let go..
2006-12-04 09:30:40 · answer #1 · answered by Issym 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Regret is a powerful enemy. Try at her last real "security" base like her parents house or a mutual friend. Dont be surprised if she doesnt welcome you with open arms or even remember you because after all its been a long time and women do have the ability to forget and move on. She may also not want to be found by you either so you just might be better off forgetting about this adventure and finding the motivation inside yourself to move on from this.In other words you may be about to open a can of worms that you really dont want to. Good luck
2006-12-04 17:33:21 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very courageous to clean up this mess from your past. I know--I've done it. It's tough, but it will make a world of difference to you and your ex-.
And, one of your other answerers had a great idea of apologizing to the woman in your life for the past 17 years. Thank her and tell her how much you appreciate her staying with you. And make it right with her!
You've gotten good advice from other answerers, and if you follow it I'm sure that you'll find the contentment that you seek.
2006-12-04 17:44:40 · answer #3 · answered by Peter S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not contact her parents and tell them you would like to send apologize or send her a letter care of them.
There is no reason they cannot pass your number on to her and she can call you, blocking her number if she doesn't want you to have continued contact.
I think I would seek out her parents or friends and explain that you owe her an apology and would like to make contact and would like her to indicate if she wants to hear an apology and how or not.
I think you have to make it a safe way to communicate, such as sending a pre-paid phone card, so she can call and protect her number, or a letter sent via a trusted friend.
She may still not respond, but I understand the desire to apologize and be forgiven.
You can't make her forgive you, but you can say you are sorry.
2006-12-04 17:25:16 · answer #4 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
20 years and you cant move on because you feel you need to apologize to her? Honey PLEASE! odds are she's long forgotten about it or frankly just doesn't care. If you apologize what big difference in her life or yours would it make, odds are none. You can not commit because of your own reasons not because you owe someone an apology at 42yrs old its time to move on.
2006-12-04 17:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to contact one of her family members, a mutual friend, if your ex-wife has old coworkers. Some one must have a lead on where she is.
2006-12-04 17:28:32 · answer #6 · answered by genuine1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why you vent thought about it 20 years ago that one day you ll be 42, i think now nothing could be done, so try to be content what ever you ve.
2006-12-04 17:26:39 · answer #7 · answered by wizard 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes happens when we unjustly hurt someone. contact her even if it is in a letter and make your peace with her and maybe than u can move on and find some happiness.
2006-12-04 18:08:44 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a life time----find her, tell her.When you find her and get it off your chest you'll feel free......Try looking on the internet,or call her parents.
2006-12-04 18:27:37 · answer #9 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your name Earl? Are you working on your list?
2006-12-04 17:54:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋