My Husband Is NOT circumcised, so when we have a son he does not want him to be circumcised, but I do?

Question

How can we come to an agreement, all of the guys in my family are so I see it as normal, but he thinks its not needed. Which would you choose.

Answer 1

well be sensitive to your husbands wishes. . . he might want his little boy to be just like him.

Plus when he is pottie training him at some point your lil boy is going to want to know why his lil weenie is different than his daddies?? That would be sad.

Plus uncircumcised men have more feeling during sex then men who are!!!

Answer 2

This was not a big topic for my husband and I while I was pregnant. Although I was in favor of it, I let my husband decide. After all he is a man and would know how it feels (he is circumcised).

Yes there are studies that prove men who are not circumcised have greater risks for STDs and infections. This is not because they have the extra skin, but more so they were never properly taught how to clean it. When the foreskin is pulled back and cleaned properly, there is no increased risks.

In the end we chose to circumcise our son. I let my husband be the sole decider because I am not male and would not have a clear understanding. I am glad we chose to.

After having my son my grandfather spoke to us about it. His older brother was circumcised but he was not. He hated not being circumcised. He was constantly teased in the locker room during P.E. and sports. After high school the first big money spender for him was getting himself circumcised. He said he wished his parents would have had the procedure done when he was an infant. As an infant you heal very fast and you sleep so much there is virtually no pain. As for when he was an adult he was in considerable pain. Walking around a lot was more painful for him than anything. After my grandfather told me his story I was glad we circumcised our son.

EDIT: As for the lady who provided the video. I don't know how long ago the video was taken, but there is OBVIOUSLY no pain medication given BEFORE the procedure started. Now they commonly rub a numbing cream on the scrotum before inserting a needle with stronger pain meds that will last beyond the procedure. Check with your pedi or OBGYN on the methods they use to ensure your infant has proper pain relief.

Answer 3

Sorry but, in this instance, save the argument. There is no real medical reason to circumcise your child. Your husband is leaving your son intact which will make his early life much easier. And, if for some reason your son wants to be circumcised later, he still can. Actually, from your perspective, you will have to care for his penis a lot less in the early days than you would if he were cut. Plus, some people believe that circumcision interferes with sleeping habits and bonding in the first days because the child is sometimes in pain from the incision. Really, it is your husband who will have the responsibility of teaching your son the care of his penis, so I wouldn't worry about him developing any problems from being intact.

Answer 4

Well My husband isn't circumcised either and we will be having a son in Feb. My family are all circumcised but it's not like I was around there areas.Anyways....I decided it was up to my husband because he has had a penis his whole life and he said he had no problem with what he was given.That's just what I did, I let him decide.Hope everything turns out good...

Answer 5

That's a tough one. I don't think its terribly important whether u r circumcised or not, although for hygienic reasons, circumcision is probably a good idea. It is probably not needed, but you could tell him how much it means to you and how all the guys in ur family are hopefully he will understand . also listen to his reasons for not wanting it , see if u can understand him. Hopefully you will both come to an agreement.

Answer 6

I'm an OB nurse & I've seen infant circumcisions many times. I know from first hand accounts that it is painful (very much so) to those poor babies, even if anesthetics are used (they rarely are). I also know that there is no medical reason to have a circumcision unless 1- you have active cancer of the penis, 2- you have gangreen of the penis, or 3- you have frostbite of the penis. Those are the ONLY medical NECESSARY reasons to have a circumcision.
The other reasons to circumcise are strictly cosmetic or because the parents are not educated on the facts of a real, normal, natural penis.
I am the wife of a circumcised man but my youngest child (a son) is not circumcised. We left him intact. He's now 3 and has never had any problems with infection of any kind or any issues what so ever. It doesn't take any more care to wash or change a diaper on an uncircumcised penis then it does for a cut one. The majority of Drs & nurses I know under 40 years old did not circumcise their boys. The risks of bleeding, infection, pain, & disfigurement FAR outweigh any perceived benefit.

At least you are asking questions and seeking information. Ther person who said she was circumcising her child anyway but refused to watch a video makes me want to scream! Who does that? Who burries their head in the sand like that? If you're going to subject your child to something not recommended by any medical organization in the world, including the American Academy of Pediatrics, why *wouldn't* you look into all aspects and get as much info as possible?

If a doctor recommends routine infant circumcision, he only does so because he makes a quick profit off of it. A baby girl is more likely to get a urinary infection than a boy and a baby boy is more likely to get BREAST cancer than penile cancer. So there's no reason to just circumcise your son because you see it as "normal". It's actually an amputated penis, not in it's natural state.
Circumcision doesn't really cut down on STD's. If it did, why do so many circumcised men in the US have STD's & HIV? And in places like Europe & South America, where the majority of the men are uncircumcised, have much lower STD/HIV rates?
The only way to prevent/reduce STD/HIV is abstinence or condom use.

I'll provide you with all the links you might need, but it's obvious I'm anti-circumcision. So let me leave you with this link. Do you have a myspace account? Here's a link from a young woman who was/is PRO-circumcsion and cut her son. He had major complications. Take a look at the phots she posted.
And then after you do, please take a moment to read some of the links that an anti-circ, mother, OB RN, and birth educator is leaving you with.
I hope you choose to leave your sons healthy penis alone, whole & intact, the way God and nature intended.

Myspace thread of woman who circed her baby w/ photos included:
http://forum.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=messageboard.viewThread&entryID=27005240&groupID=100753107&adTopicID=11&Mytoken=06888D0E-32AF-41E0-B8A5AF640D26804D67261451
from group: http://groups.myspace.com/duein2006 (titled READ...Im not starting a debate, I am showing you what can happen. - Nov. 22)

Answer 7

I'd definitely choose to have my son CIRCUMCISED.

I have four sons, all of them circumcised, none had ANY problem. I was there when the doctor did the procedure, and they were perfectly fine. Just a little normal crying at the beginning and then they relaxed as the doctor worked. They were peacefully sleeping by the time he finished. A week after the procedure their penises were completely healed and they were happy and joyful.

CIRCUMCISION IS PAINLESS, EASY AND VIRTUALLY NO-RISK.

I never had any doubt that I would have all my sons circumcised too, even after some people *tried* to convince my of their catastrophist and surrealistic theories against it.

It’s just SO MUCH BETTER

Circumcised men have less risk of contracting AIDS-HIV and other STD's. UP TO 7 TIMES LESS RISK, and that has been proved by scientists!

Circumcised penises are cleaner, healthier and have no risk of contracting urinary infections. You will not have to worry if your son is washing his penis properly.

Most women prefer a man with a circumcised penis because it may move inside them in a less friction-based manner. Once he is inside the vagina, the unhooded penis may easily slide up and down to create pleasure for both partners (ask your partner to get circumcised too!)

My advice: ignore the radicals and fundamentalists; these people are irrationally against circumcision, and will never ever change their main, even with all the recent research confirming the benefits of circumcision.

Make the best decision for you son: have him circumcised.

Answer 8

Hmm... that's funny your hubby does not want circumcision. My husband is also not circumcised and he absolutely hates it! He said I have no say in it, they are getting circumcised. I leave it up to him, I don't have a penis, so I really don't know whats the best.

Answer 9

The only way you two are going to come to any kind of compromising is to sit down and fully listen to each other. Try a list of pros and cons and tell him how you sincerely feel but remember to listen to him! I would choose to circumcise if I have a boy next time. I find it much cleaner and less prone to get infected and do it later on in life!

Answer 10

i will bet money if they were wanting to circ you'r girl you would be screaming blody murder and calling everyone vile names. but like it or not, there is more reason to circ a girl than a guy. you talk about desease and infections, they are far more prevalent in women than in uncirced men. and it cannot be undone. if the boy wants it done later when he is a man, he can have it done, his choice. my wife had our son done at birth without saying anything to me. that was 44 years ago and i have never forgiven her for it, and never will.

Answer 11

It isn't needed. As long as you concentrate on getting it clean, it should be fine. Circumcision is a tradition that has been carried along since Middle Eastern tribes way back B.C.E., when they did not have the means for cleanliness like we do.

It is actually very painful for a child.