what do i do to cope with a miscarraige?

Question

I HAD A MISCARRIAGE IN JULY. NOW EVERY MONTH I CAN NOT WAIT TO SEE IF I AM PREGNANT, THEN WHEN I AM NOT I AM CRUSHED! I KNOW IT WILL HAPPEN, BUT IT IS ONE THING TO KNOW IT MENTALLY AND ANOTHER EMONTIONALLY. WHAT DO I DO? IT IS CONSUMING ME! I WORK IN A DOCTORS OFFICE AND CAN NOT EVEN LOOK AT PREGNANT WOMEN. ONE GIRL I WORK WITH IS AND I CAN NOT EVEN TALK TO HER MOST DAYS OTHER THAN "HI"! HELP!!

Answer 1

Be patient. I had 2 miscarraiges a year apart. On the third year I found out that I was pregnant AGAIN and went to the doctor immediately. Great prenatal care and hormone therapy gave me a beautiful baby boy. 3 months old today! Just don't rush it, and keep in mind that the miscarraige WAS NOT YOUR FAULT! Most miscarraiges occur when there is a genetic anomoly that would cause the baby to be unable to survive out of the womb, so they are spontaneously aborted. Try getting an ovulation test to see when your best chances of conception are.

Answer 2

I have had 2 miscarriages and the first one nearly killed me. Not only that but my best friend and I were pregnant at the same time so then I had to try and not resent her for not having the same problems as me. Its never easy, but you just have to tell yourself that everything happens for a reason. Keep trying and don't stress about it. The best cure for a miscarriage is to conceive again but since there is so much stress involved in wanting it so bad it can consume you and drain you. So relax, read up as much as you can about conception and fertility so you know your best days to conceive and hope for the best! It will happen and it will be worth all of the tears and heartache when you finally see that positive test again. Also, maybe get a plan together with your doctor so you can prevent any problems with the next one... like checking your levels, making sure your still taking prenatal vitamins, etc. Good Luck and relax!

Answer 3

I know how you feel. I had 3 miscarriages before I had my son. With my first miscarriage a co-worker was due a week after me and she felt guilty because she went on to have a healthy baby. I lost a baby girl at 21 weeks in Aug and I have 3 good friends that are due within the next couple of months. It is hard, but you have to try to keep your head up. My husband and I are going to try 1 more time next year. There is a online support group on yahoo groups. There is a link to it through this website: www.angels4ever.com. This website has a memorial wall where you can put baby's name (If you had one picked out). There are walls for miscarriage, stillbirth, and infants and older children. I put my little girl's name on it. As my due date approaches (Dec 17th) I find myself moving things around on her memory shelf (I think that if I was still pregnant I would be nesting now). Give the online support group a try. There are a lot of other women on there that have been through this and they can help you. Good luck.

Answer 4

I am soo sorry! I know how that feels! I am in that situation RIGHT NOW. I miscarried in June, and ever since I've been so obsessed with pregnancy and I have been spending $20-30 on pregnancy tests every month. And I am sorry to say that I havent found a way to get over it. I dont think I ever will.. or at least untill I get pregnant again.. Before I miscarried I've been trying for 8 months. So when I lost the baby I was so devastated and depressed.. I stayed in bed for a week, cried my eyes out all day long.. Well, I wish you good luck with trying again, and hopefully it will happen again for us soon!

Answer 5

Talking about it with other women who have been through the same thing will help. Ovusoft.com has a great support system. Also, I know you have probably heard this, but even though you had a miscarriage, atlest you know you can get pregnant. That is a big hurdle in and of itself. Try to make something positive out of knowing you CAN get pregnant.

Good luck.

Answer 6

I understand your pain. I lost three babies many years ago. I still think of my unborn children but the reality of what might have been was brought home to me when my daughter was born. She has a learning disability and is so vulnerable that she will need care for the rest of her life. I am now getting on in years and long so much she leaves this cruel world before me but it is not in my hands. She is a delight and brings joy wherever she goes. I do wonder what disabilities my 'lost' babies may have had. One day I hope you will hold your own perfect child but there is usually a reason why some babies miscarry. You will remain in my thoughts.

Answer 7

Honey, don't pay attention to the first responder's cruel comments. He doesn't know how difficult it is to have a miscarriage. I had one several years ago and now have three grown children. I mourned the loss of our tiny, little one for a long time. But time has a way of helping us heal from the pain. You'll see.

Answer 8

Im so sorry for your loss. I had a friend who miscarried 6 yrs ago, her doc advised her to wait at least 5 months b4 trying for another baby to give body a chance to heal. She got pregnant 8 months after m/c. Best of luck to you and your partner, hope you have good news soon.

Answer 9

I know it is hard but you can't hold it against others it will just eat you up inside. You also may be so stressed out about being pregnant again that it is preventing you from acutally becoming pregnant again. Try to let nature take its course and it will happen I promise! Good luck :)

Answer 10

THE BEST THING IS TO TALK IT DOES HELP AS NOT TALKING IS EATING AWAY AT YOU.GO AND SEE A COUNCILOR.SORRY ABOUT YOUR LOSS AND TAKE CARE