We moved to California and got a place together. He did not have a job at first, but now does and pays his half. I was his transportation until he got his car stuff in order recently. Now he wants to move out! He says because he never got to live by himself, and it has nothing to do with me and wants us to stay together. Living on your own is a great experience but I feel there is more to it. Until now we were in this together. Now it’s all about him, and he isn’t thinking about me or ‘us’. I suspect this was his plan all along. He wanted to move and didn’t have much saved. I got a nice amount for moving expenses, so I paid for most of it. I feel he has been using me to get his finances and car in order, and now that they are, he is bailing. He swears that isn’t true and he loves me, but I feel he is full of it! He doesn’t understand why I’m upset! If he moves I don’t see us being the same. Am I overreacting? Are my suspicions justified? He has been an amazing boyfriend, until now
2006-12-04 08:09:30 · 7 answers · asked by Jennessy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Just a little extra for you who already answered... why would he say he still wants this relationship? Is it just to make things easy to deal with until he moves, or because he still wants his regular booty, or could it be truthful? I have been with this guy for awhile, and we were great frineds for years before that. And he has NEVER done me wrong in any way. He has actually treated me better than any guy I have been with. So so soooo confusing, as you can see from the answers I am getting too...
2006-12-04 08:22:12 · update #1
It sounds like he's been using you, whether he planned to or not. I'm sure you were in it together, because there was no way he could do anything on his own. He had few options before, but now the world gets a little bigger when you can be on your own. It could be that he needs to feel independant. It's not about you, it's about him and making it on your own. He may still love you, and he may start over with you, but then again, he may be starting a new life.
2006-12-04 08:23:32 · answer #1 · answered by Barry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My sister's boyfriend did the same thing about a year ago and they are still happily dating. Maybe instead of thinking about him using you think that maybe lack of cash made him move in with you before he was ready. Now he's fixing that situation. Do you want a guy who's not ready to live with you, living with you? I do recommend billing him for money he owes and not letting him take any furniture that you paid for. Give it a chance he might be telling you the truth.
2006-12-04 08:15:45 · answer #2 · answered by alltheanswers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same thing happened to my friend. All along I thought he was using her and that it wouldn't last and sure enough that's what happened. As soon as he got himself a good job, a little money in the back and a new car he was gone. When she met him he had nothing and lived at home. I say if he wanted to know what it felt like to live alone he should have done it before you paid his way. Sorry you got used but you also hopefully learned a lesson.
2006-12-04 08:16:18 · answer #3 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck....
You got used here, and he is trying to break it off easily but is hurting you more so. He should be upfront and state his intentions. I mean lets think about this realistically. I love you want to be with you but I want to move out???? If my girl told me that now she might as well be telling to go sleep with whomever I feel. Relationships are progression steps forward not backward and this one is obviously a step backwards. Be cordial since it sounds like you too do care about it each other but realize that this is not a move forward and probably is a sign that he wants out the relationship.
2006-12-04 08:29:33 · answer #4 · answered by www.treasuretrooper.com/186861 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with your suspicions. Semms like he was just using you till he could get his own place. The natural progression for a relationship is for the couple to move in together ...he's going backwards.
2006-12-04 08:22:12 · answer #5 · answered by ♪ ♫Jin_Jur♫ ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he has used you. He used you help him get on his feet now he doesn't need you anymore. Kick him to the curb and find a boyfriend that is more deserving of you.
2006-12-04 08:14:13 · answer #6 · answered by K L 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let him move out and you enjoy living single like hes going to do,let him see that you dont need him it will make him come back quicker
2006-12-04 08:25:06 · answer #7 · answered by kimberly s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋