me personally there have been things in my life that led me to believe that I am. I hear people say that God did not make you this way you choose it. Who chooses the hardest road for their life. I have not only been picked on in school but told that I would be removed from my family when I do make my coming out announcement to my family. So I do not see how this has been a choice for me.
2006-12-04 06:42:34 · 13 answers · asked by Leah 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Hmm, that's not an easy answer for me. When I was real young. Me and the family went camping. One day my father took me for a walk in the woods. We sat on a log and he whipped out my peter and proceeded to tell me about the birds and bees. Though now I doubt his sincerity at the time. Some people came along so he stuffed peter back in my pants and we went back to camp. Nothing was ever said of it. As the years went by he was always coming into my bedroom late at night molesting me, same when I was in the shower. A locked door never stopped him from coming in the bathroom. All the while he assured me that it was the right thing to do and I believed him because I was young and vulnerable and extremely quiet and shy. In time all that all stopped. Soon after I lived by his example and started having sex with my brothers best friend. It seems he was also victimized by his father so it wasn't that awkward for either of us, even the first time. Ever since, I've been having sexual relations with men, no relationships at first, just sex and go. I'm now in my third relationship. Seven years now. I'm a responsible civil individual who has had a very promising career. ( Actor ) I am financially stable with a good circle of friends. I don't know for sure if my homosexuality is of my own making or maybe my father influenced that. I still think about that. Still, I have no regrets. Funny though, I bear no resentment towards my father whatsoever. I love him. He's still my father. Always.
2006-12-04 07:12:05 · answer #1 · answered by zzap2001 4 · 8⤊ 3⤋
Hi Leah,
Thanks for your question. We choose a lot of things in our lives - our friends, our clothes, even our actions. But there are some things we can't choose - our eye color, our skin color, our height - our sexual orientation. In the early 1900s, young boys and girls who were left-handed were forced (sometimes with physical violence!) to learn to write with their right. And now we see that viewing left-handed persons as wrong is not only ridiculous, but can be very harmful.
As to sexual orientation - we do have a choice whether we are going to deny or hide our sexual orientation. But we are not able to change it. Contrary to what highly biased research from NARTH or others indicates, ex-gay therapies do not work and - just like "re-educating" left-handed persons - cause harm.
My advice to you? You have loving relationships with your family and friends. But you also depend on family right now for many things. Be sensitive to yourself and make sure you are both emotionally and financially supported before you come out. Find people right now who can support you.
Good luck!
2006-12-04 14:54:32 · answer #2 · answered by Joe 2 · 8⤊ 0⤋
No. I'm bisexual, the only choice I made was coming out. Being attracted to the same sex is as natural to me as walking.
2013-10-14 06:10:52 · answer #3 · answered by Eric 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not a choice. I can remember even at the age of 6-7 realizing it. You don't choose it, you only come to realize it sometime in your lifetime. It is hard, some of my friends didn't accept it but I still haven't come out to my family. We aren't religious, but they've never talked highly of gays/lesbians.
If you ever need someone to chat with, I'd be more than happy to help you along with whatever I can.
2006-12-04 14:55:52 · answer #4 · answered by Tracy 2 · 7⤊ 2⤋
Okay don't let my picture fool you, I'm actually a very kind and carrying human being. I'm a 15 years old female in California, I read your question, and it got my attention. I would like to make clear that for some people(not alot) homosexuality is a choice. For me it wasn't, I never chose to become a lesbian, I was born that way I'll give you an example. WAS BEING STRAIGHT A CHOICE FOR YOU? and yes I would like to see how straight people answer that question. Another thing I'm not to fond of is whenever someone is against Gay's they a;ways have to bring the bible into everything. Cause unless I'm not sitting with GOD, and unless she's(i think god is a girl ;) ) telling me with words out of her own mouth i wouldn't believe. I don't believe in things unless i hear the words coming out of that persons mouth. If I don't I automatically think is BS.
When i was about 7-8 i knew i didn't like guys. Believe me i tried to be straight, i even got with about 6-8 guys that was between the period of 7-8 grade. I finally realized what i am, at first it was like OMG why didn't i realized that before you know. No it wasn't scary for me, but the only thing that scared me the most was that one word (LESBIAN). Well I'm not scared of it no more. This is how things went down, first i started telling everyone that i was bi(bisexual). In a way i was, cause in that point i still thought some guys were attractive and stuff. (i think bisexuality is a point in ones life, i which someone see's what their real sexual orientation is. So i don't believe that a bi could stay bi for their whole life.) Then soon after that i realized that i was a lesbian, so i started coming out as a lesbian. That's when the funny things happen and they still do. People think that I'm straight just cause i don't look like a (LESBIAN). I mean how is lesbian suppose to look like? They think i just say I'm a lesbian so i can get with alot of guys without them knowing it. I have come out to everyone (including my parents) I told my mom twice, she just didn't say anything about it. I told my dad once. Oh he did say things about it, he told me I'm just going through a phase that i will grow out of it. He said that when I'm 19 years old i would probably be pregnant with a husband. I told hI'm when I'm 19 i would probably have a WIFE. Phases don't like 9 years, right? Oh and some guys that i tell that im a lesbian they say that's hot or that's sexy. Cause guys only think about sexual stuff, every time they say that's hot, just cause I'm a lesbian. They make me more gay, cause it makes me think guys are not for me at all. I JUST HOPE THAT WHEN I'M 19 I DO HAVE A WIFE SO I CAN PROVE MY FATHER WRONG ;). Now I'm totally okay with being a lesbian i love it :D.
2006-12-04 17:04:54 · answer #5 · answered by HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4 · 6⤊ 4⤋
Hi Leah,
It wasn't a choice. I was picked on in school also. It had been so hard that I felt like giving up and committing suicide. God created me in his image, I've never liked girls even when I was little. I acted like I liked girls but deep down i had feelings for boys and I knew that it was considered wrong to have same-sex feelings. Thats why I never acted on it but as i got older I could no longer deny my feelings for other men. i came out.
2006-12-04 15:30:02 · answer #6 · answered by What'd You Say? 6 · 6⤊ 1⤋
For me, it was not a choice. To anyone who believes that sexual orientation is a choice, I challenge them to state when and how did they make that choice. If you look closely, you will see a strong correlation between belief in choice and disapproval of homosexuality. In other words, it is the people who dispprove are the people who believe that sexuality is a choice.
To correctly handle the Word of God we must . . .
1. . . . take the common meaning of the word in the original language (Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek) at the time it was written
2. . . . take the cultural context of the passage
3. . . . don't take everything personally
4. . . . take the broadest, most documented position
5. . . . take it seriously
2006-12-04 16:30:32 · answer #7 · answered by eboue1 3 · 11⤊ 3⤋
Being gay wasn't a choice, but because everyone I knew back when I was 13 said that being gay is a sin and I'll get gay bashed, I chose to fight it, and up until last year when we move because of hurricane katrina, I now accept it because of my new friends. I'm now a happy homosexual teen with a loving boyfriend, and love being happy!!
2006-12-04 16:17:58 · answer #8 · answered by Alex J 2 · 15⤊ 3⤋
NEVER. IT WAS NEVER A CHOICE FOR ME. If anything when I came out I wanted to be straight...it didn't happen and believe me I tried.
2006-12-04 14:46:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 14⤊ 3⤋
I had feelings for females even before I knew what being gay meant. I didn't think that two people of the same sex could be a couple. This was when I was in pre-school so that's proof enough to me that it's not a choice.
2006-12-04 16:11:55 · answer #10 · answered by Scully 6 · 12⤊ 7⤋