2006-12-04 05:52:19 · 13 answers · asked by phyllis_gene_levy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if you truley care about someone then you will be able to forgive, but you will never forget. One thing you do have to watch out for is that whatever happened can resurface in the future. (normally in arguments) if you really want any kind of relationship with this person you have to learn not to hold it against them and truley forgive them
2006-12-04 05:55:21 · answer #1 · answered by sxiecat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive and forget are 2 terms with different meanings...which is why they are often said together (one doesn't stand for the other).
Forgive means that you hold no ill will toward the other person for whatever they did or said to you. You do not blame them and are not angry at them...and won't hold it over their head down the road.
Forget means that you will not remember. It is as if the event/words never occured because you cannot recall them.
You forgive by choosing to do so. It's up to you...do you want to hold anger against someone for what they did or not? It's okay not to forgive, and you can still be someone's friend or love them, and not forgive them for something they said/did.
I don't recommend forgetting...although some prefer to forget. Our memories are often all we have to remind us of what has happened in our life. Our past is what made us who we are today. Why would we want to forget that, unless it was so terribly traumatic as to be unsettling?
2006-12-04 05:57:51 · answer #2 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so hard. I'm struggling myself to forgive my niece and sister for spreading rumors about my marriage to my in-laws. This happened over a year ago and I still have problems speaking to either one of them. Now they're both planning to move out of state and I won't be able to patch things up before they leave. I'm not certain I want to patch things up. For me, if someone hurt me badly enough, I just don't want to have anything to do with them ever again. I can't forget so I also can't forgive. What they did was unforgivable and no matter how many times they say that they're sorry, I know they'd do it again in the future. So now I don't talk to them and they have no information to share with people about me. I try to remember good things about our relationship back before they stabbed me in the back and that way it doesn't eat me up inside. You just have to let it go. Try to think of what you learned from the experience ( not to trust too much ) and then it won't hurt so much. Hope this helps a little!
2006-12-04 05:58:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not have to forget about what happened, you just have to be careful to make sure it doesn't happen again. Start as casual friends, just talking every once and a while, then you can start hanging out again. But dint let yourself get hurt, and you shouldn't be around someone who is only going to hurt you. During your conversations, you can talk about what happened but dint get upset over it, because its just part of the past and its time to move on. Also, talk about when you had fun together and all the good times.
2006-12-04 05:59:11 · answer #4 · answered by Nichole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I will say that forgiveness is a choice. For me, that means the person who wronged me does not owe me anything - not an apology, not change, nothing. We cannot erase anything from our minds, but we can choose to move on. That may mean keeping the relationship or taking a break from it until trust can be regained. It is a painful process. I still remember the event, but I choose not to hate or have ill-will toward the person who hurt me. I pray for his/her best and for blessing in his/her life - even if my heart hurts. Here's a quote I found on flylady.net today. "Refusing to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Unforgiveness only hurts you. Find a friend and/or therapist you can talk to about the event/person who hurt you. You can move on. It just takes time. Blessing to you...
2006-12-04 05:59:27 · answer #5 · answered by A mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive but never forget!
2006-12-04 05:55:19 · answer #6 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgetting is impossible, don't even try. As for forgiving, think about whether the relationship is worth it and whether you'd expect yourself to be forgiven if you'd done something similar.
2006-12-04 05:55:18 · answer #7 · answered by shoelace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
reality is you can forgive, but not forget. Try it and go with the flow
and see if it works for you it might.
2006-12-04 05:57:18 · answer #8 · answered by Fiesty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
convinced, because you want you probably did not do what you probably did to be forgiven for. it isn't undemanding, even if it has a extra efficient area to it, because the different man or woman has a extra efficient understanding of the problem and took the time to forgive you. It ability lots at the same time as they're honest of their forgiveness, even if it nonetheless hurts because it exceeded off to commence with.
2016-11-23 16:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of my favorite quotes:
We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power of love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us
2006-12-04 05:55:28 · answer #10 · answered by MizCutiePi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋