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Has anyone experienced this before… Ok I moved in with my boyfriend into an apartment over 5 months ago. The problem is that I want to move out I still want to be with him but I don’t think I want to live with him. I kinda miss the days that I used to spend with myself and the days that I looked forward to seeing him. Do you think if I tell him that I want to move out that it would be the end of the relationship? Have you been in a similar situation if so what did you do and what was the outcome?

2006-12-04 03:19:51 · 7 answers · asked by No... Why Me!!!! 2 in Society & Culture Cultures & Groups Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender

Note: I chose the apartment and he actually ended his lease at his other apartment to move in with me but I kinda fell to his pressuring me to move in with him.

2006-12-04 03:20:19 · update #1

Sogullable you are a frigging horse face *****! Next time keep yuo opioions to yourself you Dope!

2006-12-04 03:34:02 · update #2

Thanks Lesly...

2006-12-04 03:36:20 · update #3

Hey Cowboi... I hear you...and I now know I should have given it more thought or voiced my opinion louder but felt if I continued saying no to moving in I would have lost him.
I like doing things by myself but the thing is he like to spend time with me and sometimes tells me that I don’t spend enough time with him.

2006-12-04 03:54:09 · update #4

7 answers

If he is happier with your current arrangement, he's not gonna be happy about you "unliving" together now. He'll feel betrayed, and hurt because he gave something up to be with you.

No one can "pressure" you. You could've said no. You're a big boy and should've thought all of this out before moving in with him. If he's hurt, he's not gonna be able to be just friends. ADD: or continue a relationship with you.

Instead of leaving, talk to him openly. Let him know that you are adjusting to this new closeness. Then take up a hobby that gets you out and doing stuff on your own. Even if it's a day at the library. Living together is a big adjustment. IF you love him, and it sounds as though you do, give it more time as well. 5 months isn't that long. They say it can take a year to fully adjust to living with a partner.

Good luck to the both of you.

2006-12-04 03:25:46 · answer #1 · answered by L 3 · 3 0

OK, well things will get messy if you tell him you want to move out. He and you made a committment to each other. To live your lives together. Backing out of this will send a clear cut message to him you aer not ready for the committment you made. He will feel betrayed and hurt. I know if it were me I would tell you I didn't want to see you again. It is very hard to back up and keep things they way they once were. It ussually ends in a disasterous breakup. Sorry probably not what you wanted to hear.

As for your feelings. It is also somewhat normal to be feelign this after movign in together. Some feel it right away, some months later. Give yourself some breathing room. Go find a hobby to do by YOURSELF, without him. Find this avenue to explore.

I really have to voice here. If you decide to move out, then don't expect him to stay. It's pretty much all or nothing at this point. Also if you move out, end up single realize one thing. YOU are not ready for a steady committed relationship (like most gay men) and stay single. Stop hurting those who are but leading us on.

2006-12-04 11:39:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

Well i did the same thin but 4 the wrong reasons. I moved in with my girl about 4 months ago. She was really depressed and i just wanted to see her happy, so i asked what can i do to make u happy n she said "if u move in with me" i told her yes, and i did. I really regret it because i miss my own life and my own freedom. I still live with her because like u i am afraid that she may want to break up with me thinkin i wanna be with other peopl or sumthin like that so i see where ur cummin from and i hope u find a solution to ur issue. Because i am too much of a punk to hurt her an tell her the truth.

2006-12-04 12:23:08 · answer #3 · answered by Nina 2 · 2 0

i havnt been in a similar situation like that.but my guess is that the relationship will be over. only because you would rather be alone than with him. it sounds like your bored with him. you need to ask yourself if you love him and really want to be with him. is he the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.
when you move in with someone that your having a relationship with, its a serious decision that you have made. not something to take lightly. if you move in with someone for financial reasons its another thing. but as boyfriends you are going to experience a lot of ups and downs with the relationship. dont make a decision in haste. think about this and then talk to him and see how he feels. maybe he is feeling the same way.
remember your in a relationship.treat it like one. best of luck to you.

2006-12-04 11:56:48 · answer #4 · answered by shyboy 3 · 2 0

tell him how u feel, and that u don't actually want to end the relationship u just miss living alone. and no, i have never been in a similar situation.

2006-12-04 11:23:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

He'll be hurt and that's for sure, but help him understand, that sometimes to keep our relationships strong, we need time to ourselves, this is usually true with long-term relationships. This enables us to regenerate our energies in our own personal space. It's just human to need space, nothing wrong with that.

2006-12-04 11:54:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

hey whats up i have been trying to get her @$$ kicked out of here but it is so hard tell him you just need you little something that is your and only yours good luck

2006-12-04 12:14:54 · answer #7 · answered by duckie 2 · 1 0

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