My one friend is starting to complain to me about everything, I dont mean to seem like I dont care, but I cant take all of the complaining. At first it was because of my friend (lets call her W) was making comments and she thought she was talking about her (helped her with that) , then it was about some guy talking about her (helped her with that) ,A nother schoolmate of mine (Lets call her I) she says is getting on her nerves, the second time she complained about I , I was right behind her. What do I do cause I am not a miracleworker and cant fix every problem my friends have?
2006-12-04 03:06:22 · 8 answers · asked by --; cookie. 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
No their names arent willow and iisha.
2006-12-04 03:18:30 · update #1
like someone stated ...toxic friends will suck the life out of you!! im 26 and had a "best friend" since i was 9..ive just recently kicked her out of my life. and i can honestly say that after 17 years of knowing eachother i am happy to be rid of her dramatic crap!! so tell her to cool it, or leave her on the curb!!
2006-12-04 14:34:35 · answer #1 · answered by mommyof5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you have to balance being a caring friend with a healthy dose of self-preservation. If you are being driven mad by your complaining friend, then it's time to be straightforward and tell her that you care, but you can't DO anything. Sometimes a person just needs an ear, and doesn't expect you to do anything, so be sure that's really what your friend is asking of you. If your friend just needs an ear/shoulder, offer it if you can, but don't let it get to the point that it's making you crazy. You have a right to feel healthy, too!
2006-12-04 12:01:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes when I complain about stuff, I'm not looking for my friends to fix it. I'm just looking for their sympathy. Maybe you should make sure you're clear on what she's expecting from you as a friend. It also sounds like she's pretty insecure, which isn't your job to fix. But you can try to boost her self-confidence in ways that don't make her cling to you by encouraging her to try new things or complimenting her for what she's good at.
2006-12-04 12:01:45 · answer #3 · answered by CuriousQuery 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your best bet is honesty. Tell your friend that while you don't mind encouraging her with choices and supporting her when she needs it, you just can't fix things for her all the time. If she gets upset, then I would reevaluate the friendship. Toxic people are no fun to be around and she will eventually learn that when she is lacking for friends.
2006-12-04 11:10:12 · answer #4 · answered by Bellamy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it's not easy to hear your friend complianing about everything, but sometimes ppl want to get stuff off their chest. Sometimes they don't want U to fix it, just to listen.
Other times they do want U to fix it and that's when you have to say something. I'm not sure what you should say, but whatever it is you say DO NOT be mean about it and DO NOT be insenstive. Even if it's something like, "I'm sorry, I can't help with this problem. I feel like you're dumping your problems on me and I feel like you expect me to solve your problems. I can't solve your problems. I value our friendship, but this is really hurting me." (something like that, I don't know)
2006-12-04 15:08:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well tell your friend that you can take anymore... honesty is the best method to this problem.... tell your friend to just focus on herslef and not what others are saying and doing no biggie what others think of you it is what you think of yourself. just tell her to deal with it on her own and just be friends nothing more.. you have to learn to fight your own battles at some point.
2006-12-04 13:34:08 · answer #6 · answered by evil_fallen_angel41 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please it is normal to fight.but if it is tearing you part to something like the olden day like hang out im 12 belive me it is not easy!!! but life goes on and you need to treaser the moments.lol but do somethin ok byez good luck
2006-12-04 14:56:26 · answer #7 · answered by sparkcherry07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are their names willow and iisha
2006-12-04 11:14:31 · answer #8 · answered by ohh babyyy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋