Since my hubby and I've been together, (going on 14 yrs.), we've had to change churches like 4 times- twice due to a pastor quitting or college. We have, however, stayed in good contact with alot of people, and even attend when we're in town. Some people have always been our friends, and are happy to see us. But, why do some people- who acted like friends when we were there- and who shake your hand, etc... when you visit... They don't want you to have their email address. This year we wanted to save on postage and email cards. But, our contact is dodging being asked for addys in a way that makes us wonder. (Like she knows that these people, who we have sent cards to every single year), don't want us to have them. We can't recall doing anything to upset, and have even stooped to asking if we've done anything wrong to forgive us. *With no response. Why can't some people bury the hatchet? I haven't a clue.
2006-12-04 02:15:23 · 6 answers · asked by answermaker96 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You need to be less sensitive. You can't make everyone in the world happy with you. Some people just want to be what and who they want to be. Church is only a front for most people. I don't want to seem judgmental but if psychology courses were taught in school, alot more understanding would be had. People come to church with all kinds of ills and they stay worldly as in the business of what others are wearing, etc. without looking at themselves. "...judge not lest ye judge yourself" is meaningless to most people because they feel nothing is wrong and not even deep-rooted with themselves. But a christian friend once told me something that calmed me down so that I wouldn't be half as selfish as I was and hope that it can benefit you. She told me, "God put all kinds of people on this Earth to make it go round." These people are not for you to figure out. I know that it is hard to not personalize their outcome but you need to remember that all kinds of folks have issues that you need not get into nor want to get into. Your stance should be to accept them as they are. You are responsible for you. You have your relationship with GOD. Simply give them a smile and accept who they are at that time. People are like open books. Read what they are showing you. Perhaps take the time to read a self-esteem book. There will be things that even yourself can stand to sharpen up on. We can't cure everyone's ills, and our only choice here is whether to remain having these persons sharing in your world or not. One more thing- I read a while back that people are only in your life for certain lengths of time. And those who must leave without staying a lifetime usually ends contact with the other by arguing because they know not how to move on for whatever reason(s), graciously. Try to take a new light on this situation and give it a smile. They know not what and why they do and nor do you nor I. Acceptance and a smile is always the right way to go. I hope this helps you.
2006-12-04 06:06:35 · answer #1 · answered by rightbackatcha! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, people like to communicate in varying degrees. Those people might be the type of folks who are just happy to see you and talk to you when they see you and may not want much more contact past that. Then again, they may be doing some things on the internet that the church and you may frown upon and therefore are not willing to give out their internet addy. Also, a lot of people don't know how to tell other people that they don't want to end up with a bunch of forwarded messages and unsolicited information, which is what happens a lot of times when email addresses are given out.
Don't personalize it too much. There are a lot of factors in this equation that may or may not involve you and your husband that really don't warrant you spending that much time and energy on figuring it out. Just have a Merry Christmas and treat those people who won't give you their addy's like old friends when you visit them again.
Take it easy...
2006-12-04 10:27:27 · answer #2 · answered by It's not that serious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because most protestant churches seem to be centered around the pastor and not the church and its doctrines. I've seen it happen a few times at my MIL's and some friends' churches. Sometimes there are doctrinal differences, but usually it's a see how many people we can 'save'- ie get into our church. If you aren't there you were never really saved to beging with. :(
My suggestion is look into the Catholic Church. The word Catholic means unified, or Universal. And this will NEVER happen in it.
I'm sure you have some misconceptions about it. (Most non Catholics do)
So try these sites for answers to your questions.
2006-12-04 11:07:50 · answer #3 · answered by Everything you know is wrong 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love to go to church to worship, but sometimes I see it as one big hassle. I have been to churches where no one was friendly at all and made me feel very unwelcome and I have been to churches where the people are too demanding and expect you to participate in every single event and thing that goes on there. I have been to churches where if you didn't dress like you just stepped out of a band box, they would look down at you. And I have been to some where the "dress code" was obviously not enforced. The church that I am currently a member of is a wonderful church, but one time I was asked to help out with the Christmas program and when I told the director that I just couldn't do it because I was 9 months pregnant and physically exhausted, she wouldn't speak to me after that. In fact it seemed to me she went out of her way to be rude to me. I don't understand why the people who are suppose to be such good Christian people act like they have never heard a word that Jesus said!! The Golden Rule obviously does not apply any more.
2006-12-04 10:33:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are just going to probably the wrong kind of church for your lifestyle. Your church seems to have members that are quite rigid and exclusive.
Maybe you could try going to a church where all are welcome, all are welcome to participate or not, whatever they choose, and all are welcome regardless of background or faith.
Organized religion has little to do with faith, and fellowship is not contingent on organized religion. Go to www.uua.org and check out the Unitarian Universalist Fellowhip association. You will discover that fellowship is common among all faiths, but not contingent on any particualr faith.
2006-12-04 10:52:05 · answer #5 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems to me that if you are a child of God it does not matter where you worship.the ones that turned there back should look at themselves and wonder about their on christianity
2006-12-04 10:26:36 · answer #6 · answered by teresaw 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋