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one year ago today she died,not only was she a friend but she was my computer buddy tought me a lot (here is a drink for her) she will all ways be (waiting for you @something .com) i miss her and don't know how to deal with it.

2006-12-03 11:29:50 · 16 answers · asked by sweepingstars 3 in Family & Relationships Friends

16 answers

I will venture to say that you may never "get over it"....when we lose someone we never forget them....as time goes by you will learn to live with the feelings death of a freind brings....I dont beleive that "time heals".....The loss never goes away but you learn to deal with it in a way that is not so fresh and biting as time goes on....Dont rush yourself , but don't get bogged down in the sadness either. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and take it one day at a time....some days you might have to take it one hour at a time or one minute at a time.....It will get better....but you will never forget her....Think of the good things you remember about her.....and be glad you knew her and let those memories cover the sadness of her being gone......Good Luck and Take Care ! ! !

2006-12-03 11:39:57 · answer #1 · answered by Lrn'dTheHardWay 3 · 0 0

A year and a half ago today, my friend also died and trust me...there is no getting over it... there's just moving on! Here's a poem I wrote just for u!

No More Tears To Cry
by CJ Ware
a year and a half
since that cold day in January
yet I still remember it like it was yesterday
(I guess to me it always will be )

rain poured down as if it desperately needed to rid itself of all moisture
as if the clouds felt that they had to ring out all the water that night

that very night
or else the world would come to a drastic end

to me that "end" seemed to come anyway

the streets were pools of water
cars spinning out of control
she never had a chance to grow up

fifteen
she was merely fifteen

too young to experience life on her own
yet too old to have it spoon-fed to her

she wanted to be independent
a rebel
she wanted to say that she had done it without her parents ever knowing
but they found out

2:00 AM
knock on the door
"I'm sorry ma'am"
was the first words out of his mouth
"your daughter was killed tonight in a car accident"
the world came to a halting stop and yet the room still managed to
continue to spin

"you don't know what you are talking about"
"my baby . . . my baby, she's upstairs sleeping"

frantically she ran up the stairs
she was gone
no where to be found

its over

she was identified

it was really her

a best friend to so many . . . her life stolen away

I heard the next day

full of disbelief I acted as if I never heard the words

"lies . . . our school is so full of lies . . . its only a nasty rumor, you know how
that is"
was my reply to the news that soon became a reality to me shortly after

I saw her

lying . . . still
no movement
although I could have sworn that at any moment she was just going to rise
up out of the baby blue bed that she rested in and bring peace to a room
full of grief

it didn't even look like her

it wasn't her

too long I glared at her
questions running through my mind like a freight train at a speed to fast
to comprehend

"God, she was just a child. How could a life so young, be stolen so
quickly? "

no reply

I got infuriated with Him
she was a good kid
just made a few bad choices
I never thought they were severe enough to be punishable by death

the next day
as I witnessed the casket that held the breathless
body of my dear friend
be lowered into the earth

tears poured down my cheeks like rain out of heaven

it was so cold that day
I could feel the salty droplets dry hard on my
face

fifteen degrees

I wondered for so long about the life of my friend
I pondered this question so many times

why shall the innocent die, while the murderers run free?

how come she never got to fulfill the "perfect"
plan that we are all promised?

it has taken me this year and a half to understand the loss of my friend
it has taken me this long to realize that her
plan was played out

it is all summed up in this one word that often brings shutters to the
bones of so many

"lessons"

her death was a lesson to all that she left behind life is fragile
there is no way that we can control who lives and dies
all we can do is have faith that we will get through it

good and bad are obvious and sometimes not so obvious

right and wrong choices can determine life or death

so it's time for us to wake up
mourn no more
for time will heal our broken hearts

and one day
there will be no more tears to cry

2006-12-03 11:38:59 · answer #2 · answered by C.J. W 3 · 2 0

You never really get over it but after a while you remember the good times. You will always feel sad but it can't be helped. Remember the good times and remember that you will always miss her but she is in a good place right now. Don't live in the past though. Live in the present. Remember her but don't let your grief keep you stuck in one moment. Talk With those that knew her and reminisce. Enjoy what you remember from her and miss her but don't be to hard on yourself.

2006-12-03 12:08:56 · answer #3 · answered by JEB 2 · 0 0

I am so sorry for your loss. There's no way to just get over a loved one. You could try going to a therapist or there's groups your local Hospice center probably puts on. Remember all the good times you guys had together. Good luck!

2006-12-03 11:33:18 · answer #4 · answered by Heather <33 4 · 0 0

My sympathies to you! She must have been really special. Don't ever get over it and don't ever stop missing her. Time will make the pain go away but she was obviously an important part of your life. Keep that forever!

2006-12-03 11:40:52 · answer #5 · answered by the_pharaoh109 4 · 1 0

Hopefully with time you will be able to heal, however, that isn't always the case. Just remember the good times you had and she would want you to live a happy life.

2006-12-03 11:32:50 · answer #6 · answered by Amby 2 · 1 0

You never get over it, the grief just subsides a bit with the passage of time. Remember this, that your friend certainly doesn't want you to break out in tears everytime you think about her. She wants you to remember the good time in your heart, where she lives on.

2006-12-03 11:34:12 · answer #7 · answered by WC 7 · 1 1

i just lost some one close to me and i look at it this way. They are not the ones suffering we are cuz they are gone. They are in a better place looking down on us making sure we are safe. I no it very hard but just think what i have said

2006-12-03 11:33:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

Time.

2006-12-03 11:33:23 · answer #9 · answered by iansand 7 · 0 0

Only time heals over a grieving loss of someone close.

2006-12-03 11:32:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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