im only 15 and i want to have a baby. i babysat my 1 month brother for a year. and i also watched him for a whole week. but i want my own child.i want to be a mom. i want to find out what its like to be a mom for the first time.
2006-12-03 09:56:15 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
No you don't. . . you just think you do. A child at 15 would so seriously damage your life you cannot imagine. A child to babysit is cute but everyday care for a child is intensely stressful at times. If you want to experience that (without having your own child) volunteer at a day care center for a month.
Having a child entails:
-giving up your social life for years
-giving up your education
-giving up your friends (they will not be willing to give up their freedom to help you long term no matter how cute the child is)
-having big time financial commitments to cover (the average cost of a child for its first year of life is over $ 10,000.00)
-having the $ 10-15,000.00 necessary to bring the child into this world (nobody else wants to pay for you to have a child through welfare or medicaid)
-giving up your sleep (babies have their own schedules and you have to follow them, not yours)
-giving up getting married probably because a lot of guys do not want a pre-made family
-involving your family HEAVILY in your life to help support you and your child (which they might not want to do. . . they've already paid to raise you to age 15. . . most parents of a 15 yo do NOT want another child to raise)
-setting up transportation to get you to and from the doctor and then the baby to and from the pediatrician (do you want to ride the bus all the time?)
I could go on but you are getting the picture.
The other thing. . . the father will take off if you have a child at 15. Don't expect support. Guys will say I love you for sex but when you are pregnant. . . it's bye, see you but probably not. . . and that HURTS!
Don't do it sweetie. Wait until you are in your 20s have an education, a good solid husband and a home of your own. You'll thank me then.
2006-12-03 11:34:06 · answer #1 · answered by snddupree 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know how you feel! I wanted a baby ever since I knew what one was and couldnt wait to be a mom! But I also realized that because of the love that I already had for my unborn children, I wanted to make sure they had a good life and a chance to be healthy and happy... knowing this I knew the worst thing I could do is get pregnant while still in high school. And better yet I needed my babies to have a great daddy and have a home to grow up in. Before you can support a child, you have to be able to support yourself above and beyond your needs! You HAVE to think about that little baby and that its your job to make sure it doesnt enter this world too early and suffer for it. I know its really hard for you to understand now but its hard to make it in this world. Once you move out you will get a taste of bills and complete responsibility. Its a scary thing!
You know in your heart that above all your wants and desires, if you love your unborn baby, you will wait until its the right time to bring him or her into the world! And knowing that you will have made first and best decision as a mommy and you are well on your way to being a great mother!
Have patience! You wont regret it! Good luck sweetie!
I also want to add that the chances of you having a healthy baby and a healthy body at this point in your life are very low! You would end up with horrible stretch marks and other such things you might not think about, and your body will NEVER be the same. Even if you got pregnant right now, there is a chance that the baby will not survive... and i know thats the last thing you want. Make the choice to be a good mommy now, and wait for your beautiful little one!
2006-12-03 21:11:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you babysit a 1 month old baby for a year?
How do you expect to be a good mother when you are working all of the time. That is what you will be doing if you have a child at 15. You will have the child around 16 and then off to work you go. Diapers are not cheep, I think you can figure at least $100.00/month. Formula, that is another expense, what is formula now $15.00/can? ok a can every two or three days... that is a minimum of $45.00/week at $180.00/month. Ok then we have daycare, I paid $75.00/week 5 years ago so, that is $300.00/month. Lets not go into the wellbaby care? What is a uninsured office visit today??? $60 +/visit?
My point to all of this is do the right thing....... Give a child a good start in life. A loving PARENTS,with a home of its own. You dont want to struggle when you have children. You want to be happy so you can be more available for your child. By available I mean emotionally, mentally, finacially.
Without a education, you will lack in all of the above..... Think about it.
2006-12-03 11:21:15 · answer #3 · answered by Igottheanswers 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure you'd be a great mom, but there is an appropriate time for everything and 15 is not the right time for you to have a family. I know it sounds so easy right now, but trust me you should live your life and go to school. Go to college, party, go to clubs, date boys, have fun...and then when you're old enough (hopefully after you graduate from college, and have a stable job and relationship) think about starting a family.
Having a baby is not cheap, and sometimes its not any fun. You like the idea right now b/c when you babysit, you can give the baby back and you don't have to pay 800 dollars a month for child care. Do you think you can afford 800 dollars a month for child care, $500 for bills, and another $1000 for a home at age 15? I'm 23, a college grad, with a good job (and 14 weeks prego) and I'm barely making it. Take it from me hun...live your life and have some fun before you start a family.
2006-12-03 10:13:34 · answer #4 · answered by tangyterp83 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you! Being a mother is a great and fulfilling experience. Be patient though. While I'm sure you have many great qualities that would make you a wonderful mother, in the long run you'll be happier if you can wait a few years and get married first. It's easier to love and enjoy being a mother when you have a loving supportive husband by your side for those sleepless nights and crazy days. You will also have a greater sense of peace when you have a baby if you are old enough to be financially stable.
2006-12-03 10:15:31 · answer #5 · answered by Steph 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok first and foremost you are only 15 years old which means that you have so much more time for thinking about a child. your not financially stabled and your not ready to take on such responsiblities. live your life to the fullest first, go out with friends and party and just have fun like a teenager should. you have all the time in the world to think about a baby but that time is not now so please finish college and get a good job that will pay you a lot of money, get a husband who will love you and stay by your side no matter what and then you can think about getting a child.
2006-12-03 12:40:32 · answer #6 · answered by cutensexy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got PLENTY of time to find out what it's like to be a 1st time mom.
Babysitting isn't the same thing as being a mom.
You want a baby so you can dress it the way you want to and to have your friends say, oh how pretty, but.
Your friends arn't the ones will be up all night, loosing sleep as the little darling screams it's lungs out.
They will not be the ones to take it to the DR. or the ones to pay for its clothing, food, or medical bills.
You would not be doing a justice to a child or your self at this young age.
your 15...fininsh school, get a decent job, get married, THEN have a child.
You will be physically,mentally, and finacially ready.
You have 1 now, and most likely you'll give it up for adoption.
2006-12-03 13:08:43 · answer #7 · answered by iwish40 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OH hun you don't want a baby, trust ME, you DON'T. You want something you can really call your own. I was 17 when i got married, got pregnant, miscarried, got pregnant 2 weeks after the miscarriage, dropped out of school. I'm 30 years old now, i have 5 kids total, and i'm on my second marriage. Believe me when i say WAIT. Wait til you are out of high school, wait til you are out of college, wait til you're financially stable and have a home and a career of your own. These days as the taxes and prices for material things for a baby, toddler, kid, teenager go up so does your stress level. I wish (knowing what i know now) to God that i could turn back time and finish what i've always wanted to do in life. You'll regret yourself and the decisions you made if you decide to have a baby. I don't regret my kids (God knows I adore each and every one of them) but i regret the decisions i've made. And I tell my oldest everyday, "Don't you live the life I did" You, and every kid around you need to know that there are better things out there to experience before you settle down to harsher responcibilities. And having a baby is as HARSH as they get. There's the getting up every two hours to feed and change (so they won't get diaper rash) changes of clothing every 4 to 6 hours cause they've messed 'em up. Constant whining and crying when you're not fast enough. Then doctor's visits, immunization shots, boogers, nose bleeds, coughing and so forth that you SERIOUSLY have to worry about. My youngest is 5 years old now. I've been home for over an hour. You want to know how my day went. I woke up this morning, gave my 5 year old children's tylenol cause he's been running a fever for 4 days now. Took him to the emergency room 'cause i can't get the fever to go down. Found out he has borderline pneumonia which requires him to have alot more attention than what the other kids are getting. I've had to put off this weekend with my daughter and taking her to do some Christmas shopping cause i've been so worried about my son. At your age, you should be thinking more about school than having a baby and wanting to take up THAT kind of responsibility. I WISH I had the responsibility you have (which sorry to say is hardly anything) Have you even discussed this with your mother or father? And if not, what do you honestly think they'll say? They'll say the same thing any other adult with kids (married or not) will say what i've said. WAIT wait wait. Seriously, WAIT.
2006-12-03 10:13:14 · answer #8 · answered by dragonlady042 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most girls your age want to have a baby, its the biological urge to procreate. However, you need to wait until you have a good education and a good job before you even think about having a baby. Having your own child is nothing like babysitting, you can't give it back when its fussy or you want to go out and have some fun. You also need to understand that most marriages end up in divorce, and you will have to be able to support this child for 18 years. You won't be able to do that making only minimum wage. I suggest you continue babysitting as much as possible, and that you find other kids to babysit as well. That will help stifle your urge to mother children, and you will be able to finish your education, plus, you will make a little money to put towards your future.
2006-12-03 10:04:06 · answer #9 · answered by judy_r8 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without a supportive husband and your own home and a job, it will be horrible for you and a baby. Babysitting is nothing like being a parent. You were not responsible for clothing, housing or medical care of those children so babysitting is actually easy.
You will be real sorry and selfish for bringing a baby into the world as a teenager. You have nothing to offer a baby and love does not pay the bills.
2006-12-04 03:16:45 · answer #10 · answered by KathyS 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋