Is having children a part of a "complete life"?

Question

No children: what am I "in for"?
Does having children change the character of a person? Or do certain people of a certain character decide not to have children. I am contemplating on whether having children is a good choice. I believe it it not mandatory to have children and also that it doesn't fulfill any ideal to have children. Considering the state of society now, I can not imagine rearing up children in this society that seems to progressively become laxer in values. I also think bringing up children is not so easy any more. I do not think it selfish not to have children. And the religious ideas of a "good woman" becomes a mother is not for everyone. Hedonism is thoughtless way to squander time and that isn't a reason to not have children.

Ultimately I fear that I may miss out on great blessings, and other such invaluable sharing of one's life..Any thoughts/opinions?

Answer 1

How do you define a "complete life?" That should define what needs you have to feel complete, satisfied, challenged and fulfilled.

Having a complete life did mean having children for me. The current state of the world is scary, but I felt that I could have a positive effect on the world by raising my sons to be honest, responsible citizens. I tell them all the time (usually, when I have to make an unpopular decision) that my mission in life is to improve the world by being a good mother.

Don't waste your time worrying about the opinions and judgments of others. If they are worried about whether or not you have children, they are petty and small minded--you don't exist to justify someone else's ideal of a "good woman." Decide what fulfillment means to you--maybe you'll find that becoming a mother, and maybe you'll find it in other roles.

Good luck.

Answer 2

There are plenty of people in this world who have a very happy and full life without having children.
There are plenty of people in this world who have a very happy and full life WITH children.
Everybody is different.
If you find yourself feeling like something's missing in your life and you're just dying to hold a baby or look after other peoples' children so you can be around them ... then I would say it's time to maybe reconsider your child-less life.
But I don't think every single person NEEDS to have children to be happy.
A lot of child-less people find they share themselves enough with their partner and don't feel the need to have kids. Some people just don't have the patience and understanding to bring up children and they know that.
HOWEVER - I'm a firm believer that if you can't bring up your children to be good people and financially, emotionally and psychologically support them in their lives ... then I don't think you should be having them.

Answer 3

I think if you choose not to have children it is your choice, and not selfish at all. i think if anything you should be teaching this to teens who are sexually active and wanting kids before their time. i think it is well thought out of you. some people just are not "cut out for that" and ethical and mature. be yourself and be proud of who you are. period. i do have children and i am on your side . it is sooooo hard to raise moral children in a world with no morals. in a society that forces us to believe we evolved from monkeys but our children dare not tell the teacher they believe in creation and jesus and god! my daughter was told she was wrong for her belief in creation by her fourth grade teacher (she is 9) evolution is a theory and it is crammed down our childrens throat as well as liberalism and acceptance of homosexual practices . which is against our christian beliefs and ethics. so no the worls is corrupt and unfair... we no longer have freedom of religion either.

Answer 4

yes, children change you, they make you care for someone other than yourself and the love they give you is the greatest thing on earth. also, bringing up kids has never been easy. it is up to each woman to decide for herself if she wants kids or not, and i don't believe it's wrong if you don't. i am a mom of three.