My sister hates my pregnancy, help?

Question

I am 20 weeks pregnant and I am 19. When I told my parents they were so upset in me, but we are dealing with it. I still talk to my brother (25)(he is the first person I told, cause I was scared). My parents told my big sister(23). She was very upset at it. She yelled at me. She said I am stupid and she was supposed to be first to get married and have a baby. This all happened when I was only 8 weeks. I have not talked to her since, she has not called me and she has avoided me. I want her to be there for me. I don't know what to do. Thanksgiving this year was only me and my and dad and I feel like my pregnancy has torn the family apart.Is she being jealous or what? Is there anything I can do to get my sister back in my life? My mom says she is still mad after 3 months. What should I do?

Answer 1

give your sister some time to come around. she may be jealous that your unborn baby will the the first(?) grand child and recieve more attention than her first child might. this baby is coming no matter what and she will have to deal with it or continue to be away from the family.

Answer 2

Your parents are upset because they only want the best for you. Are you planning on getting married to the baby's father, is it a committed serious relationship..these questions are probably hitting your parent's minds. It is difficult as a woman raising a child alone.

Your sister she could be more understanding, considering the fact that she's a young lady just as you are. When you're pregnant, you're sensitive to the things you hear and see...because you're with child...it's normal...sometimes the hormones....In a way I sense a tad sense of jealousy with the line she was supposed to be the first to get married and have a baby. Grandparents are so in love with the first grandchild because it's a new experience for them. Maybe your sister is avoiding you because she knows this is the time she should be selfless and give you support. She probably doesn't know what to say after her outburst of anger, and she would have to appolgize to mend the healing process between you two.

You have not torn your family apart. People handle different situations and crisis in their own way. In no way am I comparing your pregnancy to a crisis...but if their were a real crisis who's to say that they would know how to handle it while under pressure. This is the time your family should come together not pull apart. It's not the end of the world. The bottom line is that you're having a baby...and don't need the stress or the drama. This is something they have to deal with and come to terms with. All they can do at this point is accept your pregnancy...Because everyday you're steady growing.

The birth of a child is a happy occasion. You must do everything to thank God for the happiness of the baby in your womb. Now is not the time to try to doubt if being pregnant is tearing the family apart. Because the reality is that you are pregnant..And if a family is strong enough they should make it through difficult times...Not get stuck in thier own feelings and emotions. Take this time to concentrate on your child and yourself. The reality is that you are going to be a mother. As a mother you have to make proper choices for your child. The first step as a mother is to focus on a healthy stress-free pregnancy...Deal with others emotions after the baby is born. All the stress is not healthy right now. Congratulations and Good Luck!

Answer 3

Hi Tory that's really sad to hear sweetie...
Maybe you should write her a letter and send it to her just saying how much you need her through this and that you need and want her support for you and your baby, maybe say sorry it was not you first but i could not get rid of this baby as it is a life you created, half of you and if she could find it in her heart to love this baby as much as you love her and the baby. Also that you would be there for her if the roles were reversed and if she could put her personal feelings aside to support you and her niece/nephew
you would be ever so greatful and besides that she's your sister and you want her to be there in your special time when you bring life into the world.... Maybe that might help her come around some Tory.
I fell pregnant when i was 18 and had my son when I was 19 my older sister was the same she thought i was too young and didn't know how to be a mother or what to do to prepare for motherhood but she was so wrong, i was scared but it all came so naturally. She came around eventually, i wrote her a letter explaining how much i needed her through this and she came over and just hugged me for ages saying how sorry she was. it's been good ever since...
All the best sweetie and take care.....
good luck with your beautiful baby when he/she comes along.
Ibanez xoxo

Answer 4

Just hang in there. I know it can be hard with out support of your family. She should come around and except it before too long. It does sound like she may be jealous. You may want to take the first step and talk to her. Tell her how much you want her to be involed and that you want her there just for emotional support. Write a letter to her if you can not talk to her in person or over the phone. Just don't be rude with what you say. Ask her what is going on and why she is so upset. There may be more to the story then you know.

Try not to let this stress you out, it will pass

Answer 5

Hey, Hun Cheer-up!!You are 19 years old, according to the law- you are old enough to by pornography, cigarettes, drive, etc.. By nature, as a women, you are old enough to reproduce. You have my blessings. I get really irritated when women are scorned for things like that. Your sister is being very JUVENILE!! Don't worry about it. You are about to be a mother!! Your child will take precident over all these things, including your parents' opinions. Do not let anyone, sister, mother, father, ANYBODY ruin this blissful momment. I am sure you have a friend or relative(distant) that will give you some positive feedback. I think your big bro is the mature one in this situation talk to him and really bond with him. At this moment in your life you need a positive support sysytem, even if you are giving it to yourself. This entire thing will make you a stronger person. Good Luck.

Answer 6

When I first found out I was pregnant My sister was excited and now it feels like she is mad all the time and sad. I spoke with my mother and it seems that my sister is jealous. In your case it sounds alot like jealousy for your sister knowing that she will not be the first one to have the baby. In my personal opinion I say you should give it time and then try to talk to her and explain to her that your not trying to take anything away from her.

Answer 7

Try not to stress too much about it. Things will probably come around after your baby is born. It sounds like your sister is just jealous for you being the first one pregnant. Don't listen to her. Hopefully things will get better with your mom too, they seem to be okay with your dad. Don't worry. things will get better. Good luck

Answer 8

She probably has a little bit of jealousy in her.. All her life she has probably imagined herself going through this first and in her mind you took that away from her.. My sis was the same way, and we were the same ages too.. She came around in time, and so will your sister.. Don't stress about it.. Give her time to get adjusted to it.. Good luck to you

Answer 9

dont worry she will come round shes very selish to treat you like this at the most time you need her your 19 your not that young you will be just fine i had my first at 16 and it was great ime so glad i had my little girl shes nearly 10 years old soon good luck

Answer 10

I am deeply sorry fpr you. She is obviously jealous of the attention you are receiving. How about talking to your brother and getting him to talk to your sister because you need a lot of support.