hours away from them. I have been here for three weeks. I have tried to offer them agency help, so they can get out when I go back home. They are refusing it. This morning my grandmother yelled at me, and told me she wants me to go home. My grandfather can't walk, and she can't drive, but they refuse help from anyone outside the family, and they won't call their kids. I can't do it all. No other family members will help -- I am alone. What do you think is the best way to handle this situation?
2006-12-03 06:34:03 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Seriously, you have already gone above and beyond the call of duty and it must be very stressful for you. You cannot go on being the one and only carer. Because you are kind other people don't come forward because they don't have to. Take a break now....don't worry about your grandparents they will ask if they absolutely have to.
You could make sure their doctor is aware of their situation.
2006-12-03 07:19:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should contact the social services in their area and explain the situation. There are people trained to handle this kind of situation and are better equipped to deal with it than you are. They may not like it, but their well-being depends on it.
Secondly, I would write an open letter to the family and explain the situation. Tell them what you're going to do and why. Either they can step up and help, or they can continue to do what they've been doing, but no one can criticize you for taking action. Someone had to. There's probably a reason why your grandmother didn't call any of them.
I commend you for caring enough about them to do something. Good luck!
2006-12-03 06:41:50 · answer #2 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the "kids". Start with YOUR parents. Get them all together on the same page. IF the old folks can't manage, they need help. There is such a thing as home health care or helpers that can clean and cook. They don't have to leave their home. Many times leaving home makes it worse and they decline rapidly. With the backing of the entire family maybe the grandparents can see the advantage of getting help at home.
2006-12-03 07:04:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't "offer" outside help just GET IT. If you can't get there and they have no other family/friends call an agency and explain the situation. They are trained to handle people who will balk at "strangers" helping. If that doesn't work you will just have to chalk it up to their stubbornness as they do not have the right to dictate to YOU what you should do. You have made the offer/gesture it is up to them to accept if they don't then whatever happens is on their heads not your's.
2006-12-03 06:38:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, I feel so sorry for you I wish you all the luck. The best advice I could give you is to let one of their kids know that you are leaving in a week and that they need to come help them. Tell your grandparents that you have your own life to get back to and they are going to have to try to find some other assistance. If you wanted to assist them would you consider asking them to move closer to you. I wouldn't know what else you could do honestly their own children should be doing this, not you. I wish you all the luck in the world.
2006-12-03 06:43:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anna A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mom almost has the same problem, only yours is a little worse, im sorry your going though this! but, gosh this is a hard one, mabey you should leave for 15, 30 minutes and by then mabey they will relize how much they really need you or you could get a caregiver, (thats what we had until my grandpa cused him out) it would be a grate help but you might have to stay nearby your grandparents though. well i hope this helped you evan a little bit, hope everything turns out good?! :)
2006-12-03 06:44:56 · answer #6 · answered by bria<3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit down and talk to them. and ask other family members the situation and get them involved as well.
u emailed me so heres ur answer. everytime i emailed back it would say oops sorry it didnt go through. so i was getting mad and decided to post it here. dont mind . take care. may allah help u and everyone.
culture is diffrent then islam. people from diffrent countries follow their culture along with islam. i dont think i understood ur questions right. i hope i answered em right.
yes i believe in convering others to islam. i know of alot of christians and others who converted to islam.
take care and let me know if u have any other questions.
may allah help u and all ur loved ones find the right path.
2006-12-03 09:38:02 · answer #7 · answered by covered beauty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's great that you have been helping them, but they do need to realize there is other family that can help, and if they can afford to, they may need to get help from a nurse or an agency like you said.
2006-12-03 06:38:07 · answer #8 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU should call all of their kids & explain the problem.
Everyone should be pitching in to help in a situation like this.
Good luck.
2006-12-03 06:38:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you at school? On a job?
Just say no. I can see why everyone else scattered like roaches. Sounds like my family. Move on and they will figure it out.
2006-12-03 07:11:35 · answer #10 · answered by mickeyg1958 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋