My husband has been wrking overtime then on weekends gets drunk and lets off steam .But we havent had sex in 2 weeks.I know he takes care of himself on net porn as an addicton.I just blew up and said he doesnt mind the store ect.and got kind a nasty about it! then he tried to have sex with me but I really wasnt interested at that moment as I just yelled to have sex it didnt seem right.We are almost 50.I figure a man on his own should want you and now that I made a fuss feel worse! I think now I will back off and never try to push a river again! Any advice ,Im hurt I had to yell about sex!
2006-12-03 04:09:22 · 9 answers · asked by jessy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sounds like hes got alot of fantasies,,talk to him about it maybe yall can play some of them out,,,it might be fun,message me if you need someone to talk to
2006-12-03 04:46:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
(Firstly, for someone of 50, your command of English is rather weak. Secondly, I have no idea what "pushing a river is". And thirdly, I'll try to figure out what this question even means by reading between the lines.... if I make errors, I wasted 20 minutes of my time trying to solve a problem.)
Marriage, be it for 10 years or 50 has a common element of respect, admiration passion and trust. Toss in there tons of warm fuzzies, companionship, and courtesty, and being joyful, and enjoying each others' company. This is not to say that it is perfect, doesn't have ups and downs, doesn't ebb and flow, but being a companion, and having one each of whom are respectful of the other, is what makes marriage wonderful. The purpose of life is to be happy, and if it is not, most of us try to do things that DO make us happy.
Your specific problem appears to be that he is addicted to computer porn, as well as alcohol..... Well, hon, addictions are addictions, be they alcohol, sex, computer porn, gambling, etc., etc. And the problem with an addict is that they just aren't available....(and that's the key word --- AVAILABILITY---- they already have a companion, or in your case, several -- computer porn and alcohol..... (booze, drugs, or a computer) you just aren't invited!!!! because they are already busy!!) So the things that a husband is, in a normal marriage (company for a movie, to the symphony, to an art show, to a play, a parade, a picnic, family gathering, yadayadayada) just aren't available to you.
You should also know that computer porn as an addictions is just barely treatable, much less curable..... ask any computer porn addict -- these guys would rather look at 13 year old air brushed bimbo kids that have the real thing --- any day, any week, any month.... just as they'd rather have the bottle, any day, any week, any month. Sorry, hon..
2006-12-03 05:54:26 · answer #2 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...theres you're problem, you're not letting him unwind! He's trying to give you extra money to take care of the home, and you yelled at him about YOUR sex drive? I think you should apologize and tell him that he is doing a wonderful job of providing, and at night, once everything is calm and peacful, then go for having sex. Don't get all fussy when you KNOW he is working a little harder than normal.
2006-12-03 04:28:15 · answer #3 · answered by Pandora 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Disconnect the internet. When you calm down have a heart to heart with him about the incident and tell him why you were hurt and yelled. No one is a mind reader. Go out with him sometime and let him work off steam with you.
2006-12-03 04:13:20 · answer #4 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself a "helper" and take care of yourself. You can probably do a better job by yourself than he can do for you at this time. If his satisfaction comes from the "net", how do you expect to compete? Let him be and let him lose himself with his folly and you go get yourself a monster appliance to help you out. Don't forget extra batteries too. Have fun, I bet you'll soon see you don't need his grief.
2006-12-03 04:22:30 · answer #5 · answered by J.M.C 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Two weeks is not that long to go without it. There are people who are happy and have no problems who go longer. Maybe he just doesn't need it as much, that happens as men and women age.
2006-12-03 04:34:13 · answer #6 · answered by Chris 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
forget the bullet... get a rabbit and plenty of batteries. Take care of yourself for a while... he will get the hint. Heck you might not need him for anything other than taking out the trash after you get a rabbit.
2006-12-03 04:15:25 · answer #7 · answered by bobndew 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You overreacted. Cut the guy a break.
2006-12-03 04:33:30 · answer #8 · answered by S K 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
2 words......Silver Bullet.......(wink)......
2006-12-03 04:12:55 · answer #9 · answered by Emily 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋