ok guys lighten up?

Question

say something funny i need a laugh im trying to cheer up but tis not working

Answer 1

A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, "Do you have any grapes?" The pharmacist says, "No, try the grocery down the street." The next day, the same duck walks into the pharmacy and says, "Do you have any grapes?" The pharmacist says, "No, try the grocery down the street." The third day, the same duck enters the pharmacy and says, "Do you have any grapes?" The pharmacist says, "I told you we don't have any grapes. If you ask me about grapes again, I am going to hammer your little webbed feet to the counter." The fourth day, the duck walks back into the pharmacy and says, "Do you have any nails?" The pharmacist says, "No." So, the duck says, "Well, then, do you have any grapes?"

Answer 2

I was once about to make some Tuna Helper. I was getting out all of the stuff I would need and a frying pan and everything. My old roommate used to like to mess with me because I am kind of gulible. He walks past me in the kitchen, and very casually says, "Dude, make sure you brown that Tuna before you pour in the milk." He walks out, and without even thinking twice about it, I spend the next 10 minutes frying tuna as if it were hamburger. Turns out he was right aroud the corner laughin his @ss off. Nice.

Answer 3

to boot all the small misc stuff, I even have offered 2 shot annoying and positioned away moist beat to crap older than airborne dirt and dirt 20 ga pump shotguns in pawn shops. One for $40 and the different for $25. They have been scratched, rusty and in many instances disgusting looking piles of junk. yet they have been rapidly sound. I stripped, sanded, stained and polyurethane the wood. the two had aluminum receivers. The receivers had a remarkable style of the black worn off and have been scratched to boot. on account that reblueing aluminum is a royal discomfort with out the main suitable kit, I stripped the black off (uncomplicated Off oven purifier), sanded out the scratches and polished them to a severe shine. I then glass beaded the best of the receiver to cut back the shine and glare. I reblued the barrels as mandatory. One I took to a gunsmith who expertly put in a draw back pad so the quick inventory might in good shape my taller physique. That fee me greater desirable than all the different supplies blended. in the previous i ended one gun a guy does not provide me $50 for it. After-wards he presented me $150. I had approximately 10 hours and $15 invested in it. He replaced into shocked once I advised him it replaced into the comparable gun he does not pay $50 for.

Answer 4

Sorry got nothin. I'm bored. I know how it is. What put you down? Acctually nevermind call a friend or something! They will help you more than any stranger on the internet! lol!

Answer 5

They're holding the next world swimming championships in New Orleans?

Answer 6

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
H. G. Wells

Answer 7

here's a joke: what's the best kind of grass to own?
EMO grass, because it cuts itself!!! lol

and... Whats the difference between a bass player and an onion? You dont cry when you cut a bass player.

hope these jokes are just dumb enough to brighten up your day!

Answer 8

nutten against blonds.

This blond walks into a pawn shop and ask "how much is that TV"? The guy says " sorry we don't sell to blonds". So she goes and dyes he hair red. back to the Pawn shop and ask "How much for that TV". Guy says "sorry we don't sell to blonds". She goes and dyes he hair black. goes back to the pawn shop and ask "How Much for that TV?" The guy says "sorry we don't sell to blonds." She asks "How do u Know I'm a blond?" "Because that's a microwave your looking at."

Answer 9

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
A man fell into a mud puddle

Wanna hear a clean joke?
The man took a bath with bubbles

Wanna hear another dirty joke?
Bubbles was his neighbor

Answer 10

You should look up the idiot boyfriend video..It's funny! Listen to the words of the song..too funny!