U would laugh 2 hear about it. 1 THING IS THE "FEAR 2 LEARN" accompanied by "FEAR OF EMBARRASMENT". Like , when i was a kid, i got a small , new atlas cycle but found it difficult 2 learn to ride it. i had the fear that i might fall down. I couldn't learn 2 ride it while the other girlsof my colony learnt it fast. My family members( i.e my uncles & aunts ) tried 2 teach me a lot but i couldn't learn. Finally, THEY said i can never learn & they left trying with me. But i had decided i will learn & i took out the bigger cycle ( my aunts cycle ) & tried 2 half-peddle & slowly within days i learnt half-peddling, then full-peddling, then 1 day i rode my atlas cycle. When i grew up a biggr cycle was bought for me, but i occasionally rode it. i feared the crowd on roads, i feared that i might fall down & hurt myself, i feared of embarrasment so i stopped riding it. Then it was sold & a new cycle was got 4 me BUT it too is rotting as now i am going 2 collegewith my frnd in her scooty.HELP ME!
2006-12-02 14:00:54 · 21 answers · asked by ♪♥*B.B.K*♥♪ 7 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
NOW when i think of getting out my cycle & ride 2 college MY FEAR OF FALLING, OF CROWD, OF EMBARRASMENT comes into my way. When i tried 2 learn at college my frnds scooty ther too i failed. My FEAR didn't allow me 2 learn while my other frnds learnt it in a day.My mother says that she will get me a scooty in the coming year but GOD knows that i will ever learn to ride it or not . ALL MY FRNDS SAY THAT I CAN NEVER LEARN TO RIDE A SCOOTY AS I WAS NOT SUCCESFUL IN RIDING A CYCLE TO MY COLLEGE. I feel so bad 2 find myself depending on others. I don't go 2 jog in a field near by as no one goes there with me & i fear 2 go there alone.I FEAR THAT ANYONE WILL MAKE FUN OF ME.Actually i am the only child 2 my parents & my mom has lost her 1st son so she is very much concerned about me. When i was a kid i didn't hv many frnds 2 socialise with & my mom also tried 2 keep me in a protective shell. She feared 2 lose me.I fear am turning into a introvert,a LOSER,a ZERO. My fear is eating up my success
2006-12-02 14:18:07 · update #1
Don't ride any cycle
2006-12-02 17:05:38 · answer #1 · answered by Arun 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well somewhat like me. Even though I am not to that extreme. U can say self conscious - that if i go wrong then someone will laugh at me. Well I am still trying to get out of it completely but then this bit of advice is what I did to myself and would like you to try out. Well I was an extreme introvert and still I am but I have changed a lot. I am a lot more confident now and have started giving a damn care about others. But anyway there is still time before I can get out of that completely. Anyway here is my suggestion:
1. Just push yourself over the limit every time you get that stopping feeling. I mean just literally push yourself. The first time you do it, you will feel much better and with many such pushings you will over come your fear. Its all in your mind. The next time you feel the fear in you, just mentally push yourself to do it, no matter what.
2. Get into your head the point that no one in the world has time to see what the others are doing. If some one is really sneering at you for your faults, it means he is idle. And if someone really that idle and useless is sneering at you.. I guess that shouldnt matter as he is not even worthy of your attention.
3. Just ask yourself how many people do you sneer at? Do u remember each and every person you pointed your finger at? thats because you dont have the time to go through how foolish a person looked in an awkward situation. You may probably never recognise him even if he would be standing in front of you after a week or so. Same with others.. even if they laugh at you being caught in a silly situation I dont think anyone of them has enough time and memory to remember you for a lifetime. So whats the point of being embarrased if no one even remembers you for looking silly ...
Well I have tried this and I have changed a lot and have come out and have dared to do things which otherwise i would be afraid of being embarrased. Hope they will work for you.. All you have to do it make up your mind.
2006-12-10 02:07:49 · answer #2 · answered by Chaitanya 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be self confident. Shed the shyness. Do not worry about failures. Courage is essential to face Life. Things happen and will happen as per the will of God. The person who has brought us into this World is responsible for our lives, not ourselves alone. Face the world with optimism. Fear is always about the future on the experience of Past. You may notice there is no fear in the Present. Be happy. Look around you ,You should thank God that you are better than other unfortunates in the World.
2006-12-04 00:03:02 · answer #3 · answered by Brahmanyan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You - yourself limit your growth. Do not do this to yourself. Nobody can affect you if you don't allow them to. In short nobody is doing anything to you ( with all their comments and statements) . It may be difficult to accept but, you are doing this to yourself. Get out of the fear circle you created and be brave to face the challenges. Nobody has the right to blame you if you commit mistakes, because committing mistakes is a part of learning. In fact mistakes will make you remember more what you have learned. How can you overcome this? CHANGE YOUR PERCEPTION OF THINGS AND START THINKING POSITIVELY. Have the guts to meet new learning processes. Do not be afraid to commit mistakes. Nobody is perfect. I know, at first failure will be more than the successes, but don't give up. You have been thinking as a loser for long that it will take a very long time before you will succeed thinking as a winner. But practise makes perfect. Try, try, try and try until you acquire that correct frame of mind or positive thinking. Everyday when you wake up, look at yourself in the mirror and say: " Today, no matter how many times I fail, I will keep trying until I succeed." and I can assure you, success will follow soon, as long as you keep on trying.
2006-12-02 20:41:30 · answer #4 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you know we only started to experience fear when we became separated from God.
Tell your self you are a perfect soul. There is nothing you cant do. This Gitanjali is the role you are playing. Your the actor. The inner being. You must not suffer because of Gitanjali's story.
Separate your physical role from the real spiritual You.
Can you imagine if Sean Connery went home and behaved like James Bond? One is the actor the other is the role he is playing.
Liberate yourself and be blissfully happy that you are a fantastic,remarkable,magnificent and unique creation of God.
2006-12-09 21:47:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey Gitanjali, you dont need to fear people or feel shy to do anything that is not wrong. People cannot decide what you can /cannot do.Its you who has to decide this.To improve your confidence you can join a confidence building or personality building course.Try n participate in your college activities.You will fail once...twice but then you will learn facing people and this will built enough confidence in you.Try doing this.It will really help you
And one more thing, it is not so that if you cannot ride a scooty you cannot do anything.ALL THE BEST
2006-12-02 15:12:51 · answer #6 · answered by piya 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Life is all about taking risks. You took the risk to ride your bike and you learned how to ride it right?? so take the risk with the scooter, try riding it around with your friend before you go to collage. Start in quite neighborhoods when people are at work so you wont feel embarrassed that people are watching you (the might not even be anyway) and work you way up **** Luck with this and collage
2006-12-02 14:16:43 · answer #7 · answered by Tommorws Dreams 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
List answers: 1) who are these people around me and are they better than me? 2) In what ways are they better? 3) If their opinions are so fatally important and sweeping as a tsunami, how come not everyone dies from tsunamis? 4) why do I take myself so seriously that I can't laugh at myself some of the time, am I heir to the throne of the dalai lama?
2006-12-02 15:42:21 · answer #8 · answered by unica_hija77@yahoo.com 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Remember failure is the stepping stone for success. learn to fail and take it in your stride,You will succeed automatically.First of all throw out that fear,failure phobia of yours.It may not be easy as you are a grownup and have lived with that phobia all these days.Ensure that you are surrounded by people who encourage and avoid the once who discourage you .
wish you all the best
2006-12-09 21:53:28 · answer #9 · answered by procecutor 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey i dont think so dat u have some kind of a problem...dese things happen wid many ppl hppnd 2 me as well...dis kind of fear is casual as it happens ven u first start 2 do a new thing..but girl u have taken it far 2 seriously and its getting on ur nerves..jus take things as dey come...n have a positive attitute towards overcoming dis...n this is not at all difficult as even i hv experienced a lot of fears like u have...chill girl...ur attitude towards life is d only cure for ur problem...best of luck...take care...
2006-12-09 06:51:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds a bit like agrophobia; there are MANY types of phobias, and most people have one. I have emetophobia. It kind of took over for awhile, but I went to counseling, and take medicine, and practice yoga and other relaxation techniques. Maybe one or a combination of those would help you.
2006-12-02 14:05:33 · answer #11 · answered by MissAnthropic 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋