My husband is a mechanic and doesn't wear his wedding ring at work. I totally understand. However, many times he forgets to put his wedding ring back on after he gets off from work. Do you have any suggestions/advice and how he can remember more often? It seems like 2-3 times a week he forgets and I have to remind him. He has said that there is no hidden meaning when he does foget. I'm starting to resent him when he does forget. We've only been married for 10 months and this has been a constant battle. Any suggestion/advice would be appreciated.
2006-12-02 10:31:05 · 18 answers · asked by Curious W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is his problem not yours just tell him what you want and let him figure it out for himself. He's a big boy.
It seems unreasonable and controlling for you to demand that your husband wear jewelry, most men are not accustomed to jewelry and don't like it.
2006-12-02 10:33:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand your feelings, but don't read more into it than there is. It isn't a "ring" that makes a man "married".
My husband and I have been married for 34 years. After living with him for all these years, I have finally realized he just doesn't care for jewelry.
When we first got married we exchanged rings. Like you, I got a little concerned when he stopped wearing his. We argued about it for awhile and eventually I just gave up. Since I never liked my ring, (and he never wore his), I took them to a jeweler and had them melted down into something else. My engagement ring had been "reset" so I was wearing that as my wedding ring.
Years later we decided to get married in our church (our first wedding had been a civil ceremony) and my husband wanted to pick out matching rings for us. I had my ring, and didn't much care about a getting a new one. However, it was something he really wanted to do so we picked out new bands we both loved.
We were remarried around our 25th wedding anniversary and our rings were blessed. My husband has worn that ring since the day he put it on. Go figure!
I guess what I'm trying to say is - it doesn't matter what's on the outside for everyone to see, it only matters what's inside your husband's heart. If his heart is "married", who really cares whether or not his finger is?
Don't sweat the small stuff, life is way too short! Good luck.
2006-12-02 11:38:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should go on the job site with him a time or two with your rings on. Maybe you would understand how a ring can get damaged or cause injury to the person wearing it. I think you are making to much of this and is not worth upsetting the apple cart over. He may opt to wear it on a chain as long as the chain is not to long that it would get caught in something. My husband quit wearing his ring the day he was welding and burnt the ring and his finger. Still had the scares years after.
2006-12-02 11:46:19 · answer #3 · answered by shyone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look if you think he's cheating then just ask him. your wasting our time. if you had any confidence in your relationship you would work this out at home not on your dam computer.. look honey you just got married, communicate or get the hell out. your givin' us hard working married people a bad name. just admit you weren't ready to get married, your not prepared to be in a truly committed relationship. just because you and him liked the same music, the same food, sex,and had some of the same friends at the club doesn't mean you had to marry him. he's a dam mechanic. would you feel better if he lost a finger so you could feel better he had his ring on. be more confident in your marriage. he comes home right? you've only got 10 mons. in the club save your complaining for real stuff. get some advise from real friends, because someone out here might be disgruntled and give you some bad advice...I'm tell you this because i care. this journey is long and you need desperately to get a mentor or a counselor to get you through these new times. by the way this resentment your harboring is unhealthy, and it's really not his problem. at least not yet it isn't. sounds a lot like you think your marriage is the ring not the man or the commitment .
2006-12-02 11:31:05 · answer #4 · answered by Tumbleweed 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A wedding ring or a peice of paper does not make a marriage work it is tust loyalty faithfulness as a person who works with machinery I never wore my wedding ring it is too dangerous to make you happy buy him a necklace for a man and he can wear it round his neck all the time .
2006-12-02 10:39:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pick your battles. Don't fight, nag or feel resentment over the simple things. I am in no way saying your wedding ring is a simple thing. If he worked in an office, he would have NO excuse. But he doesn't, give him a break. I am sure he doesn't do it on purpose to irritate you.
Good luck!
2006-12-02 10:35:34 · answer #6 · answered by Mega 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband doesn't wear his wedding ring either. There is no hidden meaning behind it he has never liked jewlery of any kind on his body. The bigger deal you make of it the more he will resist wearing it. There are bigger things in life then the wedding ring. I'd let the issue drop.
2006-12-02 10:41:37 · answer #7 · answered by Pandora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have the same problem. my husband cant sleep with his ring on. he says it bothers him ( to wear any jewellery when he is sleeping) and he leaves it at the night stand....and there were mornings he will forget to put it on. we did have the same problem...finally i had it and i made it clear to him that it hurts my feelings and i walked away..i guess after nagging so much it hit him in the head( i am married for 10 months also..lol) now he sleeps with it..but just this morning i realized he didnt have his ring on when he was leavin to go to work. he played basketball last night and i know he takes it off when he plays and i know he forgot to put it on. i just checked it is in the jacket he wore to basketball last night. so i am sure he did realize and he is thinking dammmnnnn.....wife is going to be mad when i get home....i am going to mention it to him tho...he doesnt thnk it is a big deal the ring. he says it doesnt mean he doesnt love me or anything. he says it is a tradition (silly one) and why everybopdy follows it. well i all did was to show him how much it bothered me he forgets to wear it and it is important for me and i dont usually ask alot from him, and he cant do sth so small for me....LOL well it worked...good luck hun :)
2006-12-06 05:32:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Great to see he takes off his ring for safety reasons, I hope he does the same with his watch. Maybe he just truthfully forgets, I know I did because of the safety aspects in the Air Force, it just slips your mind, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Ask him to wear it around his neck on a long chain under his workclothes.
2006-12-02 10:35:58 · answer #9 · answered by graeme1944 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The solution should be obvious. Get him a chain and have him wear it around his neck. That's what alot of people do who can't wear their ring at work for various reasons. They do that because they are superstitious about the ring. Because of the importance of their marriage to them, they need to have the ring on them somehow at all times.
2006-12-02 10:35:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i do. leave him alone about it.whats the big deal. its not like hes going to forget hes married because hes not wearing his ring. lots of married men don't wear a wedding ring. you need to learn to pick your battles.
2006-12-02 10:42:23 · answer #11 · answered by BLOODHOUND 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋