why is it that gays and lesbians insist on defining themselves by there sexuality?

Question

i mean no one else on earth does this but them .define yourself by who you are and what kind of person you are ,not by your sexual preferences

carry yourself with a little more dececeny.i`ve watched some of these "rallies" you people put on and there just plain out gross,carring on with this hopped up sexuality the way you do will earn you a questionable label form other`s

Answer 1

Believe it or not, man...you're actually onto a good point. Here's my take on it: most gays & lesbians DON'T define ourselves by our sexuality; heterosexuals do that for us. We spend most of our time trying to prove that we're more than just that.
Now, onto the Gay Pride parades and such. I actually agree with you, I think that the parades are pointless--especially considering it's a gay parade that's usually held in the gay neighborhood, but the theme is usually Equality or some deritive thereof. I feel that the only reason Pride parades continue to happen is because corporations realized that there's money to be made from them (especially companies that produce alcohol). I view gay parades as a freak show--in which, gays deliberately allow ourselves to act out every stereotype that people have of gay & lesbians.
It's ridiculous and I refuse to play into it.

Answer 2

I don't, usually. I very rarely mention that I'm gay unless someone asks, but if they start talking about women or girlfriends or going out on the pull, I can hardly join in without pointing out that I like men, can I?

If you mean by posting questions and answers in a dedicated forum like this, then I would say there are two reasons: firstly, people who are asking genuine questions about their sexuality and things that are new to them need responses from other GLBT people, so it makes sense for us to read those questions and offer help based on our own experience.
And secondly, I post questions here because since I joined I've made what I consider to be good friends, most of whom are regulars on this section, which wouldn't have happened if I spent more time elsewhere. And a lot of the regulars here aren't gay, but we share common interests, and this has become a community of sorts.

I'm not sure that either of those count as 'defining myself' by my sexuality. If someone asks what kind of person I am, I describe my personality, not my sex-life. And I'm sure most others do the same.

One further point: I don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of straight people who post questions and answers in this particular section feel the need to mention that they are straight, in order to avoid confusion, because one would expect the majority of participants to be gay. In the rest of the world, where apparently up to 90% of the population is straight, it also helps to avoid confusion if one mentions that one doesn't fall in with the crowd.

I hope this helps answer your question.

Answer 3

I can't believe this hasn't been said here yet, but when you are LGBT, you are often very alone, especially if you are young. So you want the comfort of friends who know and understand this about you. We find strength in our community, and as it grows, we hope for the day when LGBT people will be treated just like so-called normal people. But until that day comes, we announce and display our diversity to encourage others to take heart so they don't have to hide in the closet and cry themselves to sleep at night and wonder if they are "freaks." Being this way is part of who I am, and since it's under attack from so many fronts, I feel it's important that I make a stand. We are not going back into the closet, and we want anybody still stuck in there to know they aren't alone.

Answer 4

Is it they who define themselves by their sexuality, or the rest of the population who segregates and looks down on them because of it? Perhaps it is their way of saying, "This is what I am, and it's time to make a stand". I agree that in an ideal world, one would define oneself by what one is and what kind of person one is, rather than by sexual preferences, but as long as some people still believe that being gay or lesbian is a sin, or a crime, or somehow makes them abnormal, they are going to continue their fight for acceptance.

Answer 5

partly because we have to stand up for ourselves. If we don't come out of the closet and acknowledge that we are a little different than the majority how can we keep those who are just acknowleging their sexual feelings from depression and fear. If the religion pressure weren't there, we wouldn't have to worry about this at all. BTW, it's not just a 'sexual thing'--- it's emotional and psychological too. It's a matter of comfort, not just sex.

Answer 6

ROFLMAO!!
How funny! people like you want to make a difference in how others are treated simply because of who they sleep with and you think "WE" define ourselves by our sexuality?
Being gay is one minor aspect of who I am, not the totality of my being, but, when I want the right to marry the person I have chosen as my mate then we hear stuff like "pervert" and "sinner" and other excuses like "you can't have children together" so now tell me exactly who it is that's trying to define a group by their sexuality? We accept who we are. It's the others that have the problem with it.

Answer 7

Everyone tends to end up being defined by their defects first.
People are more concerned about the differences in others than by the similarities. Differences are suspect and tend to be synonymous with defects, and definitions will always involve and include warnings as part of their function.

Answer 8

Gender and sexual orientation are seperate. So i'm a lady and that i'm bi. this signifies that i'm in contact in adult men and ladies human beings. I locate as a lady. i change into also born as a lady - this suggests i'm cissexual. If i change into born with a penis yet idenfy as lady - then i'd be transexual. I absolutely have a transexual pal who change into born with a penis yet feels she is a lady. So she is a lady because she had determined this. that is purely as a lot as that man or woman to make certain what gender they're (or if infact they don't sense they in superb condition both gender). My transexual pal is likewise a lesbian. this signifies that she is ladies those who's in contact in different women human beings and is lesbian. purely the same as a women human beings to change into born with lady genitalia and is in contact in women human beings is termed a lesbian. at the same time as those women human beings are in contact in different women human beings it does no longer lead them to adult men. This also applies the incorrect way round. If a guy is gay it does no longer make him a women human beings. wish I helped to sparkling issues up for you

Answer 9

oh, please! no one else defines themselves by their sexuality? are you living in a hole? I've known lots of straight men and women (mostly men) who just love to brag about their sexual conquests and what they love to do in bed. how many gays/lesbians do you know? how many gay pride fests/parades/rallies have you actually seen?
Being lesbian is just part of who I am...it's not how I "define" myself. I don't introduce myself by saying I'm a lesbian..nor do I even talk about my sex life. sure, I go to pride fest every year...to get together with friends and have a good time. If you think it's gross...don't go!

Answer 10

Well, in my experience it's others who want to define me by my sexuality. I have never walked up to anyone and introduced myself as "AB the queer". It's part of who I am, so what? I have found the only one's who want to place that label on me are the one's who don't agree with it.