I met this guy, who I really like. I super attracted to me, and I'm attracted to him. The thing is he's more . . .experience in the bed room with me. And I'm going to put it out there, I'm a virgin, and he wants to have sex. Now we're both fairly young, and I'm not on the pill. Althought we have condoms, what should I do? Any advice on how your first time went really wrong?
2006-12-02 07:45:20 · 27 answers · asked by Jolette 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I waited until I knew the girl I was with was the right one and then it was over year before we made love (note I didn't say sex). We was 19 then and I'm 40 now and we are still together (and still in love). My advice is don't rush into this because if he is not the right man for you and you have sex then you can't take your virginity back if you make a mistake. As for worrying that you'll lose him if you don't, then was he really worth it if thats the only reason he would stay with you for. I waited until my girlfriend (now my wife) was 100% sure she could trust we would be a long term couple. Ask yourself the question first - and I'm sorry if I am dissing your boyfriend cause I am a man and I know how men think - What happened to his other girlfriends after he had sex with them and why didn't they last?
Also I will quote Adam and the Ants (probably before your time :-)
Let all the braggers brag
Virginitys no crime
Your body should be yours
and sharing it sublime.
Just think how your future husband will look up to you and respect you when he knows you saved that special moment for him.
2006-12-02 07:57:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say how long you've been with this guy, but I hope it's been long enough to know he will respect YOUR signals to proceed or to slow down or stop. If this is the case, go for it. Please use protection. Sex is a wonderful thing that can be shared between two or more people who are comfortable with each other. I don't know why people keep relating sex so quickly to marriage. Realistically, marriage is no more than a piece of paper that shows the religious community and the Government's acknowledgment that two people are a couple. Who cares?! One of the other people posting may be right in saying that you are being used for sex, but two can play at that game. Who buys a car with out test driving a few first? If you are comfortable, have a good time, enjoy yourself. If you don't have a good time, think about what you didn't like. Ask your friends....don't just give up...sex is a truly wonderful thing for people to enjoy.
2006-12-02 16:24:22 · answer #2 · answered by Yeah, it's good 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I'm going to sound preachy on this one, but don't have sex until you are ready to have a baby. I'm thinking, like after you are done with school and have a job. Condoms don't always work; neither does the pill for that matter. Don't roll the dice with your future. If you do decide to have sex, get on the pill. In most states you can get a doctor to prescribe it for you without your parents having to know, it's called patient confidentialility.
That being said, whatever else you choose to do with him should be based on your comfort level. Oral sex is a perfectly good alternative to vaginal intercourse. Just don't go too far too fast, that's the mistake that I made with my first love. And make sure that he's willing to go down on you before you do him, that's the sign of a good lover, someone who is attentive to your needs before his own.
2006-12-02 19:22:12 · answer #3 · answered by pritti_dayzee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I waited until I was married. Your too young to be thinking about much less having sex. While do you want to put out just for some stupid boy? You can get STDS, AIDS, or pregnancy especially if the condom breaks. If you get pregnant do you actaully think he's going to be there for you? No he won't and you'll be one of the thousands of other teen moms who end up on welfare or run away from home or abort your baby. No wait until you are married and have a good job and are out of high school before you have sex. If this boy really loves you than he'll agree to wait. Most boys at this age just think about sex all the time. It's not about love it's about pleasure for them and they don't care who they hurt as long as they get something. And nothing happened my first time. If he doesn't want to wait than dump him.
2006-12-02 21:09:34 · answer #4 · answered by baddrose268 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How about not having sex so that you dont risk getting pregnant or since he is "experienced" as you said, hopefully wont pass an STD to you. Even if you think your being careful, things can go wrong. Your a virgin, so keep saving yourself for the man that you will definitley one day marry.
2006-12-02 16:16:22 · answer #5 · answered by Blondi 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
get on the pill before you do.. OR even the depo provera shot but i don't really recommend the shot.. that way you know you won't have to worry about getting prego... but use a condom as well that will help protect you against and disease he may have since he does have the experience.. he might already have some thing..
There is no point in telling you not to.. and to hold on till you know for sure you are in love and not just attracted.. And well with my first time was over in seconds..lmao... So not much to really remember...
2006-12-02 16:00:09 · answer #6 · answered by Jackson 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
If you have to ask whether or not you should have sex, chances are you are definitely not ready. You might THINK he likes you, but he's probably just using you for sex. You shouldn't have sex until your married, especially if your both "fairly young."
2006-12-03 10:38:53 · answer #7 · answered by Cayleen O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE WANTS TO HAVE SEX! but do you want to . since he says HE wants to have sex, but not a relationship??? DONT DO IT@! he will only have sex then leave you. sex is a very emotional thing. you dont just do it cause someone else wants to do it with you... sow what if you are attracted to eachother? that doesnt mean anythign. if you have sex with him you will only regret it in the long riun. you will meet someone special and regret not giving your virginity to them. you will be an emotional mess if you give it to a guy WHO WANTS THAT AND NOTHING ELSE....trust me.........so what you sh oudl do is wait till you are more mature and know oyu can make better decsions. why sleep with a guy who already "has experience" hes just out there to get 'another knotch on his belt" by sleeping wiht you. and who knows what STD's or STI's he has......stay away from him and with till you are in a steady and SERIOUS relationship. sex is supposed to be sapecail not sleeping with peipel you are only attracted to. you need to love them...otherwise it isnt special and you will regret it. please wait. till you find someone who cares about the perosn you are and doesnt want you to just sleep with you then leave...
2006-12-02 17:08:46 · answer #8 · answered by laa dee da 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im not gunna say you shouldn't cuz then id be a hypocrite... i lost my virginity when i was 14 and wanst on the pill or anything.. ive had sex a few times with a couple different guys and im only 15.. ya its stupid but im healthy and not pregnant but still you shouldnt.. if you arent ready.. plus its not safe..
2006-12-02 16:36:41 · answer #9 · answered by HoTt♥ChIcK 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First it depends how old you are, but anyway. If he likes you for you he should not care. Don't open up to him and tell him all this whatever you do. Just act like you are used to being in bed with guys. It will all fall into place<><><><>Don't Worry
2006-12-03 13:46:00 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Brittany♥ 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋