what can i do to get my mind off having a miscarriage?

Question

i have had one successful pregnancy and was pregnant again until last week and i just want some advice on how to get my mind off having the miscarriage

Answer 1

How far along were you ? I Am soo sorry I have had 3 miscarriages before I got my daughter. I know how hard it is. I think the best thing to do is to morn the loss of the baby and give your body time to heal ( a few months) and if you feel better and are ready to try again then go for it. I think that want for a baby is the thing that kills you and most peoples pain ease after they get preg. again. I do not condone replacing the other baby at all !!!!! I think you will always have a place in your heart for him/her. It is more intense the further along you are.My friend was 22 weeks and she gave birth to a live child that lived for 1 day then died in NICU. (I was 6 weeks, 8 weeks and 11 weeks) The body knows if the baby will be ok or not and that child was not so the body deported it than. ( I would much rather morn now then later when you have a still born) Everything happens for a reason...

Ps. It is very common for a women to have at least 1 miscarriage in there life time. (like every 1-4 women)

Answer 2

Hun I'm so sorry!!!

I just lost my son....he was born at at 21w3d on Oct 26 06

There is nothing to do to get your mind off of it! I hate so bad to say that you but I do know how you feel and want to be honest with you!

Try really getting into a hobby that you like!
Or a vacation!

The good news is your really fertile after a pregnancy (even if it ended in M/C) so you may fall preggo again right away! No you wont be able to replace that child but being pregnant again sure does help with the pain!

Just remember you have an angel in heaven and every night he/she lays on your pillow! And he/she has my son William to play with!

Best of luck to you Hun and I'm so sorry!!!!

Answer 3

I don't think you'll ever be able to forget this, it's hard yes, but you have to move on with your life the best you can. You have another child, so you need to be there for him/her. I've known so many people who've had a miscarriage. My husband's Mom had so many of them before she finally had him- a miracle! My mom also had one between me and my younger brother- she was very far along too :( anyways, it happened for a reason. I'm happy for the two younger brothers I have today, and I'm happy we are all healthy and okay. Be happy for the things you have, and do things you enjoy. This happens to a LOT of women, so you aren't alone. One way I'd look at it- as if they were alive and passed.... I just had my wonderful great-grandmother pass away- I adored her... so it was hard on me...but I look at it like this- she wouldn't want me to sit and mope and cry for her....she'd want me to be happy and lively. So I push myself to move forward, and live my life- I also have a 14 month old son who I have to be strong for. Knowing she is in a better place, not in any pain, this all helps me... so if you can look at it like that- I know it's different, but would any baby you have all grown up want to see you sad and miserable? Do something out of memory for your child. If you have to, go to a certain place every day to remember the child. (going to my grandparents grave always helps me) I tell them everything about my life, and even cry a little bit sometimes. It's good way to release some emotions bottled up.

I hope the best for you. I'm glad you are okay, and it wasn't life threatening to you!

Answer 4

I have had two miscarriages. There is no easy answer to this. It is a grieving process. And no one can say anything to make it better. The only thing I can say is that everything happens for a reason. You need to go thru the pain. Don't try to avoid it or you will never get over it.

Answer 5

I am so sorry for your loss. I miscarried a baby at 5months. So I truly know what you are going through. First of all, do not blame yourself. I did that, and It about drove me insane. I kept thinking about what did I do? It is Nothing that you did!! Someone told me once, after her 1 month old baby died from a heart defect, that sometimes a baby jut needs to occupy a body before they are allowed into Heaven. She believed in re-incarnation. And that she believed that sometimes absolution comes after an old soul is returned to Earth. And that their only task that is set before them is that they need to come back, and finish out the test that God has set for them. And that usually the only task was that someone else would need to love them. And as a mother who lost a child, that child was loved very much. I really hope this helps you. Like I said earlier, it helped me when my daughter, Melissa was stillborn. I still think of her, (she died in 1988), and I still send up prayers for her, that God will remind her that I still miss her, and that I love her. My prayers are with you, that you get the comfort that you need at a time like this. I wish you a wonderful holiday season~~

Answer 6

I am so sorry that this has happened to you. Try and join a support group for women who have lost a child. It might help to get those feelings out. Don't let anyone tell you that you will get over it. That is so mean!! It's something that with time, will get easier to deal with, but you will never forget the baby thats now in heaven. I truely hope that things get better. God bless you.

Answer 7

first of all, i am so sorry for your loss.
i suffered a miscarraige. it might sound funny but i started embroidery. i didn't think anymore about miscarraige. there was this little girl, 8 years and her mother is sick. i offered that she came living with us for the summer holidays. i totally forgot. the secret is to distract yourself on other stuff. try to think about another pregnancy. that is what i did. i kept my mind busy not about the miscarraige but that I WILL BE PREGNANT AGAIN AND AGAIN. and it will happen.

good luck and take care of yourself and think positive.
we can never go back in time, so what is done is done and its done for a reason. Only God knows.

God Bless you and Good luck!

Answer 8

Sorry to hear about the emotional pain you are suffering. I would suggest the following:

Internet based support groups.
Get Involved with your community
Don't get bogged down to much in the house.
More importantly, acceptance! this is the cold hard reality in life but always remember it could have been worse (life threatening).

Answer 9

You need to allow yourself to grieve. I suggest that if it is consuming you try seeing a counselor to just talk to someone about it when it's on your mind. There is nothing wrong with still thinking about your baby or wondering why. Just give yourself some time.

Answer 10

Focus on the one child you do have...be glad that he/she is healthy and happy! The only reason we miscarry is because there is something wrong with the child...something that would have effected them their entire life! And talk to your doctor about maybe trying again in the near future....Chin up!!