and had him/her come back with "You're neurotic/mad/need a psychiatrist"? Beyond the obvious ie they don't want to be found out, what goes through their mind that not only are they prepared to cheat, and lie but to mess around with your mind as well. I thinking of Chris Tarrant here but it's happened to me too. Is this a common reaction?
2006-11-30 20:28:53 · 14 answers · asked by True Blue Brit 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Cybro - you make sense. Only I don't think it's a gender thing. And as most of them are heterosexual, it takes a man and a woman to be unfaithful.
2006-11-30 21:40:46 · update #1
Welshchick - yes, I understand a downright lie. But this is a step further.
2006-11-30 22:07:38 · update #2
It's called deflection. They figure if they deny it and get you to call in question your judgement they can get away with it. I had a girl once who I knew was cheating or about to and I called her on it. She denied it at first then did that whole you're being paranoid then when I didn't nibble (as I had the email to prove it (the dummy sent a copy to me because she started forwarding a message, forgot that it was forward (because the screen is blank. it attaches a copy when you send it) and decided to write me an email so I got a copy of her back and forth. With no escape in site she basically said there was no ring on her finger.
So it went from I'm being neurotic to there's no ring on her finger. So who's REALLY the crazy one?!?!
It's amazing what things women will say to rationalize their behavior. Instead of owning that they get caught they try to figure out some way to excuse their behavior and blame you. They don't want to accept the fact they did something wrong.
That really messed up part is I think she actually believed the lie she was telling.
2006-11-30 21:23:13 · answer #1 · answered by Cybrocupid 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yep. iv accused but with gd reason. he called me neurotic and stuff and gave all that 'oh so u think that badly of me to accuse me of sumit like that' blah blah blah, them wen summit more serious came up i didnt ask questions coz i didnt want to grief, then he said 'i did that on purpose to see wot ud say, u didnt ask me any questions sp that means u dont care or love me'' da thing he did wasnt cheatin but summit that put suspicion there. u just cant win either way with men, accusin them just srokes their ego coz they think that they r hot enough to get sum1 else if ur worried
2006-12-01 10:33:49 · answer #2 · answered by kitten 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first husband did exactly that - worse still he cheated with many of my 'alleged' friends. He was such a liar and an arsehole that he made me think I was losing my mind - that was worse than the actual cheating xxx
2006-12-01 04:31:44 · answer #3 · answered by starlet108 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes! I've also been the one to accuse my partner. I've learned that unless you have some pretty good and strong incriminating evidence, it's best to just let it ly dormant for awhile until you find out either way.
2006-12-01 07:05:59 · answer #4 · answered by vocalick210 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sure its a common reaction because he most likely is cheating and thats the first excuse they come up with .........your crazy
2006-12-01 04:36:36 · answer #5 · answered by lilme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only when I knew I was right and had the female intuition going on. That is always the key...the intuition knows!
2006-12-01 04:48:33 · answer #6 · answered by marincaligirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, lets be honest here, they ain't going say "yes dear I am f*cking a woman/man i work with" are they!
You are right of course, they do play mind games, cheat, lie and disrespect you! Why, who knows, do they themselves know?
I doubt it!
2006-12-01 04:51:46 · answer #7 · answered by Welshchick 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Too many times.He got so comfortable with his infidelity he now has a second family to support
2006-12-01 04:34:02 · answer #8 · answered by JUSEve 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes I have and I've said if that's what you want to do then do me the favor and go and give me the opportunity to move on.
2006-12-01 05:45:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, because once the trust is gone.
Thus the relationship is dead !
I trust my partner implicitly and have no reason to think otherwise
2006-12-01 04:39:16 · answer #10 · answered by admiralawesome2006 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋