Sexual orientation what does this mean?

Question

I'm just asking this again because I think I typed it wrong and there were some misconceptions the last time I typed it. My fault, nobody elses. I'm a girl. 18. And I don't know why I feel like I fall in love with girls. Nothing really sexual or anything usually. But I just have a tendency to love girls more than guys. Theres two girls I know right now, particularly one, she the most beautiful person i've ever seen. She's so kind and nice and I just love everything about her. I kind of wanted to start to sit with her and her group of friends at lunch today but I just didn't feel as comfortable with the whole group because she wasn't there. I mean I'm not obsessed or anything, and I know I could never be with her or anything because but I just fell a little bit like I'm falling in love with her. I mean it's not like I couldn't live without her, I'd be fine, but just in general I just like looking at girls. I find them so pretty. I don't really have sexual feelings, I mean I have had minor sexual feelings toward girls and guys, probably pretty even, maybe slightly more girls. It's wierd sometimes I have wished I was a guy so I could be with a girl (although I can turn that off easy). And I'm really only attracted to guys that wear suits for some reason. But it's wierd I've never really wanted a close intimate relationship but if it ever came to that hypothetically I feel like I wouldn't be as comfortable with a guy and would be more comfortable with a girl. And nothing really sexual, just a more emotional relationship. I've had minor sexual fellings, but nothing big, and it's almost like I can turn it on and off easily and it's no problem. I'm not interested in a relationship at all at this point but i'm just really curious as to what you think I might be if it ever comes to that. I just don't know what this makes me, bisexual, asexual? What do you think? By the way I had a birth defect and I was born without any reproductive anything and I take estrogen pills because otherwise my body wouldn't have produced anything, if that changes anything. I also don't want to be a transsexual. I like being female and feminine. That was just a lust thing for a while. I could turn it on and off easily. It was just a fantasy thing.

It's really not sexual, at least at this point, i have a desire to just get hugs from girls my age.

Answer 1

I'd say just give it time. I felt the same towards a girl at my school and we spent a lot of time together but it was never going to happen. It sounds like you know that as well. Stay near her but don't cross that line.

I never did with my friend and everything was good. It was still 5 years after that until I came out. I'm not saying that you are lesbian. I never had any sexual feelings for this friend - I just liked her more than others.

Like you say - don't go obsessing over her. You will become more clear about what you want if she can keep a straight mind. It may just be a fantasty thing because you seem no way inclined to go lesbian. It may just be hormones and discovering who you are or you may just have a natural curiosity.

Answer 2

whoa...a lot of writing. lol. looks like some of my questions...so if i skipped over anything major, my apologies. anyhow, first, it's perfectly fine to be attracted to girls without wanting sex. there have been periods where i've been attracted to guys but not wanted anything sexually. and yes, i've been physically/emotionally/sexually/whatever to guys & girls. & that's okay, too.

also, i've thought about what it would be like to be a girl on many occasions. i mean, i'm so jealous of my (girl) friends because they can get any boy they want. but that's pretty darn normal for us too. it's not 'weird' or anything.

& also, you're not a transexual, as being born with a defective/lack of reproductive system doesnt fit that definition anyhow. however, i can't add much here, as i dont have experience with this kind of situation.

all i can say is, best of luck & dont give up hope.

& i think the whole lunch table thing is so cute. i remember there was a guy in my chem class last year & i was really good a chemistry, but i always used to ask him for help anyhow just to talk to him. i'm a freak. haha, but that reminded me of it. =D

Answer 3

You confused me after a few sentences so I skipped to the last few. I'd like to say you should see a doctor. Not psychiatrist, unless you want and can, but like maybe an endocrinologist for some tests. Then you can have things settled for you better and make some solid decisions or reach some understandings....

Answer 4

In short: Sexual orientation refers to our tendency to be attracted to the opposite sex, the same sex, or both sexes. You have not referred to "sex" in any of your communication with us. Although orientation often involves emotions, especially for women, sex is the operative word here. To want to be around women for friendship just means you are homoSOCIAL, not homoSEXUAL. And we all (including men at some point in their lives) have that one special same-sex friend we just can't seem to live without. That's not sex, dear. That's friendship.

Answer 5

It means the way you are sexually! The way I understand it there are 3 ways people can be sexually oriented. Gay, str8 or bi!
I believe that people are born with their sexual orientation it's not a choice and you don't wake up one day and just say, "Hey, today I am gay!".
Hope this is helpful.
*hugs*
JAC<

Answer 6

Don't waste your time worrying over what neat little box you fall into, because the neat little boxes dont exist. Just do what you feel. You cant go wrong that way.