okay so my dad drives me and my friend [lets call her mary] to school every morning. mary is super sensitive, and i'm usually really careful not to hurt her feelings. so this morning my dad drove us to school and before school everyone just hangs out. so my friends [ i guess you could call them popular] were there too. i went down to sit with them, not far from where mary was. i mean, mary is sorta friends with them but then i guess i sorta lost track of time and i saw mary standing off by herself. i quickly got up but then mary didn't even acknoweldge me. i asked what was wrong and she just made this mean face at me. i told her something funny that happened and we just went off like nothing happened. she always gets mad, but its like, i have other friends too! i can't just confront her though cause our parents are super good friends, and we always carpool and such. i really don't know what to do. aanything would be helpful.
2006-11-30 10:54:48 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If anyone knows about having problems in high school it's abazzabba. I mean this dude posts questions begging for help because a "bully at school" is throwing food in his face. Not sure if you'd want to listen to someone who asks questions like that then turns around and tells you to punch somebody in the "teeth". That would be like taking advice from a NUN who gives suggestions on sexual positions.
2006-12-01 08:22:43 · answer #1 · answered by DRAGON'S RETURN 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Dear Major Problem:
First of all, I don't know how old you or your friend "Mary" are, so I am assuming you both go to high school. If Mary is so sensitive, it sounds like she has an issue with self-esteem. She probably feels hurt that you went over to your other friends first, and did not include her. Next time you see her just apologize to her and tell her you didn't mean to exclude her from the group. Then invite her to sit with you and your other friends. Hope this helps!
Good luck!
2006-11-30 19:00:48 · answer #2 · answered by Scout 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should ask your mom what to do. Does Mary have some emotional problems or is something going on at her home? Hyper-sensitive people aren't fun to be around, but if there's a reason for it, maybe your parents know. You should tell your parents you're worried about Mary being so delicate to the point of making her friends uncomfortable.
2006-11-30 18:58:20 · answer #3 · answered by Sabine É 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that she does tend to be a bit sensative, and that you try not to say or do anything that might hurt her feelings. Then tell "mary" that if you ever do say or do anything that she may not like then she just needs to shrug it off or tell you, because you guys are good friends and will always be their for eachother and would never purposely hurt eachother (whether physically or mentally) Otherwise, you just have to deal with her little whiney self and just let her cry about everything.
2006-11-30 18:59:36 · answer #4 · answered by Azena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sigh! I really try to avoid having needy friends because I just don't have time for it. Most needy people fall into the category of passive aggressive personality. They get their way by acting hurt because you didn't pay attention to them or whatever. It is a way to control people. I wouldn't confront her because it would just make the problem worse. Apologize as best you can but I don't think it would matter because as I said she is probably not "sensitive" at all but a manipulator.
2006-11-30 19:09:13 · answer #5 · answered by PRS 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey!! OMG when I was reading your question it totally reminded me of one of my good friends in highschool. I just graduated 5 years ago so dont think I'm some old person trying to give you advice. lol. The same thing would happen to me except the people who I hung out with (also the popular crowd) didnt really like my friend. She was also very sensitve and would get upset at the smallest thing. So like if I wanted to hang out with other friends she would throw a fuss if I didnt invite her every time. I would try to ask her along most of the time, but sometimes i would wanna just hang out with other people. When my other friends told me straight out that they didnt like her hangin around, I didnt know what to do. At first i didnt say anything but then she would be standing with us and as soon as she walked they would talk about her. I had been friends with her for a long time and she lived across the street from me, we also drove to school together every morning so I would feel really bad and try to defend her when they talked about her. One day we were all hanging out in a big crowd and she wanted to leave, but I was still talking to some friends so I told her to go ahead without me. She was so pissed at me for not going with her, she said somthing like "how important can you dumb conversation be, cant we just go" I got mad and told her dont give me attitdue because I have other friends besides just you , but you only have me. I felt soooo horrible after that day. We actually ended up not talking for the rest of highschool. i would see her around and want to apologize but I never worked up the nerve. I really wish I had because maybe we still could have been friends. So if anything you learn from my story is that approach her and talk to her nicely about it so you dont just blurt out something that you will really regret later. The good news is that we got back in touch about 2 years ago and resolved all our old issues... Highschool problems seem so trivial once you move onto college and the rest of life. So dont sweat it, everything will be okay if your just upfront with her. Hope it helps!! Good luck!!
2006-11-30 19:11:55 · answer #6 · answered by ashi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your friend mary is a drama queen. High school is gonna be a ***** for you. First of all, it's not all about mary all the time. Second of all, you have to confront her of things will get out of and and eventually you will end up choking the life out of each other. Tell her whats up and if she doesnt like it, punch her in the teeth. shell get over it.
2006-11-30 18:59:09 · answer #7 · answered by abazzabba 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Your friend Mary is what is called an emotional manipulator.
It is commendable that you are nice to her, but believe me, she doesn't need you to babysit her. You need to live your own life or she will suck you into a friendless vortex that has her as the spider and you as the fly.
Be nice to her, but don't let her rule your life. She will easily find other flies to replace you.
2006-11-30 18:58:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her what you are saying here and if she doesn't understand well she isn't a very good friend if she doesn't listen just tell her or your parents what happen maybe they will talk to her sounds like she does have a problem though hope it helps bye bye
2006-11-30 19:07:37 · answer #9 · answered by hele_val_07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess just try to include her more and see what happens. You're friends will either take to her or they won't and at least you tried.
You don't have to be her babysitter though. She has to learn to be social at one point or another, right?
2006-11-30 18:58:03 · answer #10 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋