Hi, im 18 years old and im straight but im girlfriend is bi. I love the times we have with each other but lately i been depressed because she is startin up her "bi ways". We been togeather for like 3 months now. And i dislike bisexuals. So now this girl that she knows i hate comes along and they start havin this wierd secret kinda relationship and now she is in love wit the girl and me. This other girl is trying to get her to not go out wit me and earlier made her promise not to go out wit me, but we did later anyway.
So wat im asking is, is it time for me to just move on? Cause its obvius we are 2 different types. And i know if i was her true love i would accept her but i cant so i guess im not her real love. I also been building up alot of stress lately
2006-11-30 06:43:16 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Thanks guys, but for the ones saying have a threesome, u didnt read my question right because i said i dislike bi ways. But someone said dont burn the bridge completly....i really dont wanna go back out wit her if she touches that other female i hate. Some of you guys have good answers and i respect you.
2006-11-30 07:11:39 · update #1
Boy- get out of there! You say that you are two different people and you're stressed; she is the reason why.
You say 'If I was her true love I would accept her'. Accept her as what? Bisexual? That's not the problem- I'm sure you accept her as bisexual, or you would have dropped her the minute she told you or you found out. What you're talking about is accepting her desire to be with multiple people- something called polyamory. Not all bisexuals are polyamorous!!!! There are a lot of monogmaous bisexuals who only want to be with one person, and if someone wants to engage both sexes in romantic relationships at the same time, that's because they're polyamorous, not bisexual. Polyamory happens with straight people, gay people, and lesbians. It has nothing to do with bisexuality- if you are polyamorous, it's because you're polyamorous, not because you're bisexual.
So I suppose what I'm saying is that you don't have to accept that part of her- there is NOTHING wrong with saying 'I get it that this is who you are, but it's not for me. I need partner who will be monogamous'.
Not to mention that they had a 'weird secret kinda relationship'. Back where I come from, we call that cheating, having an affair, and that is NOT cool. Have as many partners as you want- thousands, I don't care, but only so long as everyone knows about it and gives it their okay. Going behind someone's back to be with another person, no matter their gender, shows dishonesty and lack of trust and understanding and all the wonderful things about a loving relationship- I'd drop her for that reason alone.
But it's all up to you. Good luck.
2006-11-30 06:54:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What kind of girlfriend is she if she doesn't respect your feelings? What kind of boyfriend are you if you're not prepared to allow her to express hers?
You don't belong together. You're clearly a one woman at a time guy (no bad thing!!!) and she isn't showing you the same respect (okay, she's bi - so by that I mean one partner at a time). Before you dump her though, ask her how she would feel if you started hanging out with other women. Seeing as she's got someone else in her life, why shouldn't you?
Take Care - you got plenty time
2006-11-30 16:08:57 · answer #2 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think that if you dont want a lot of heartache and dissapointment in the future, you should probably cut your losses now and move on. Chances are she isnt going to stop seeing the girl for you, just as she didnt stop seeing you for the girl... even tho she promised her. She says she loves both of you, but she still broke a promise to the other girl by seeing you still.. so obviously she doesnt have any real plans to be exclusive with either of you.
2006-11-30 14:49:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Treat the situation the same way you would if she were seeing another guy. She's seeing someone else, so you can too. Go your own way and leave her to hers. You can be nice about it and leave things open for the future. It's possible she's still exploring her sexual orientation and hasn't quite figured herself out yet. She could decide she's straight later on. Or you might meet someone else whom you're more compatible with.
2006-11-30 15:14:59 · answer #4 · answered by Wolfgang 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This girlfriend of yours obviously needs to explore herself more before she can settle down wit you. Don't burn the bridge forever, but i suggest breaking it off with her because this relationship is making you depressed and doubting yourself.
You're young, live and let her live. These kinds of complicated relationships are nothing but stress. Good luck with moving on.
2006-11-30 15:00:55 · answer #5 · answered by Sandra Dee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself what you would do if this other person was a guy. Would you put up with your gf sleeping with another man? You're young. Cut your losses now.
2006-11-30 14:47:45 · answer #6 · answered by Ben P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move on...you might catch it! Don't understand any man that wouldn't dive right between two women tho.....actually sounds like your girl is changing from Bi to Lesbian....It's cool..at ya'lls age you're still evolving.....Move on!
2006-11-30 19:52:00 · answer #7 · answered by sckreet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't accept it then you should definitely move on. She isn't going to change and you can't make her.
2006-11-30 17:20:05 · answer #8 · answered by Broken hearted 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her for a threesome... that is what I would want... if my boyfriend was bi.. get them in bed and let her make up her mind... give her the time of her life...lol
2006-11-30 14:46:24 · answer #9 · answered by my cat killed a bird 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is no way you can handle this situation. Move on.
2006-11-30 14:51:28 · answer #10 · answered by elgil 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋