My boyfirend has made it clear to me that he wants some freedom. Like going out with his friends and stuff. I am ok with that, but he is going out for hours at a time...like last night he left at 5:30 pm and didnt return home until 5am this morning. What do I do to get through to him that this behavior is not of a husband or father but of a tennaged boy? Please help me!
2006-11-30 03:00:52 · 10 answers · asked by hollytaylor_18 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is 23..and we have a 18 month old daughter together.
2006-11-30 03:20:26 · update #1
Just for the record. I am not asking anyone to tell me how to live my life and what order i should do things in, I am jsut asking for some advice and some of you have realy givin me something to think about and I thank you for that!
2006-11-30 03:33:50 · update #2
He has more responsibilities now that he has to pay more attention to then he did when he was single. And he has to open up his eyes and realize that he is married with a child now! And he should be wanting to settled down with you & his child. But it seems that in his mind (which shows you that he is still very immature) that he believes that since he is only 23yrs old he should still be allowed to be able to party with his friends all night long like he use to. What you should do is give him an ultimatum and ask him if his friends & partying all night long is more important in his life or is it you & his child? I don't want a problem to happen between the two of you but he has a family now, and I feel that he should be taking on the responsibilities that come with and he should also be Greatful to God and Treasuring both you & his child, he should want to stay home with you guys instead of wanting to go out & party all of the time. The two of you should be much more important in his life. He can have his free time to spend with his friends, but he should want to limit that and spend most of his free time with you & his child. Family is a blessing and he should be honored to have the two of you in his life!
Good Luck
&
God Bless!
2006-11-30 03:57:05 · answer #1 · answered by bigred 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look this dude is out having fun and not ready to settle down.No matter what u do it wont change him till he wants to.Dont whine to him about it he will just rebell and do it more.Have him sit with the kids while you go out ,make it even.I hate to say this but it may be the relationship could be going south.Its important u step back and see because otherwise it could be a big shock and hurt u more.Get your life in order when men dont come home its very bad sign.So no more whinning to him get yourself in order and detach from him! Theres a nice guy for u out there!
2006-11-30 11:13:57 · answer #2 · answered by jessy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if telling him how you feel will help. Tell him it's okay to go out with friends and stuff - but not to come home at 5 in the morning!! Tell him to be considerate - that you worry.
Why don't you try to do the same thing one time and then ask your boyfriend how being left alone at home til 5 in the morning makes him feel?
2006-11-30 11:22:11 · answer #3 · answered by Cindy M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is a father or you want him to be the future father of you children you might want to try to him these things...
1. This is no behavior for a father figure
2. I understand you want to get out of the house but can you try to limit to 2-3 hours.
3. Then say please.
4. If he says no then you might want to try to find somebody that will actually act like a husband and a father.
2006-11-30 11:06:39 · answer #4 · answered by Crazy K. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insist on going out with him to figure out why its so fun. I'll bet something else is going on that he isnt telling you. Most bars close down at 3 am, so unless its a 2 hour drive to where he is going, he is going somewhere other than a bar after it closes... IF HE STAYS THAT LONG!
2006-11-30 11:04:41 · answer #5 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For starters you should stop fornicating and having kids.
First comes love
Then come marraige
Then comes the baby...
I think you have it all mixed up, now your going thru hardships, your babies are going thur hardships, and this guy doesnt care about either of yall.
You should ask the father what goals he has for his kid, then ask how they can be achieved, If he doesnt really care, then your out of luck and on your own.
2006-11-30 11:29:33 · answer #6 · answered by Gyasi M 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He wants more than 'some' freedom. I suggest you give him 'full' freedom, by showing him the door with a new lock!
Please dont allow him to 'use' you in this way.
2006-11-30 11:10:31 · answer #7 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont be under his spell if he's behaving like a single teen... show him who's boss and give him the freedom he wants but limited...
2006-11-30 11:05:31 · answer #8 · answered by in-confident 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is he? Do you have children together?
Without knowing that, I cannot answer your question.
2006-11-30 11:02:31 · answer #9 · answered by Karen L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him hust like that
2006-11-30 11:19:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋