i am getting married in exactly 4 weeks. it is an arranged marriage & i know her since 3 1/2 months. i think more or less all day long whether things will be fine once we are married.
we are in a long-term r'ship now & have only met once & spend around 2 days together.initially we were in love, but then the love went (from her part). she tells me that once we are married she willlove me probably. but at the moment i am thinking about how this marriage will be all day long.i am one of the best people at work but now i am much the worst performer in work since the last 1 month or so. am i taking too much tension? is it true that mostly love will develop mainly after marriage in an arranged marriage?
me & girl we like each other & we accept each other but r still far away from saying we love each other. (atleast from her part) she had told me stuff initially like she'll be there 4 me till death & try her best to make me happy,etc. but she also says that at the moment she doesnt luv me
2006-11-30 02:44:58 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i meant long distance r'ship of course
2006-11-30 03:10:42 · update #1
I can't imagine what an arranged marriage is like. However, marriage is a commitment in all cultures. The "in love" wears off even in marriages not arranged and the work sets in. If counseling or classes is allowed in your culture I would try that. If you agree on children, religion, family, and values you have a good shot.
2006-11-30 02:49:25 · answer #1 · answered by it's me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you cannot say that youa re on a "long term relationship" by only being together for 3 and a half months. Get real, you don't even know each other.
Secondly, on an arranged marriage, you don't know what your are going to get until you get there.
You have only see her for 2 day and only met her once? Then you wonder why is she scared? BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T KNOW YOU! Duh!
Of course, things will go smother when you get to co-habitate and know each other. The way things are done in your country seems strange, I wouldn't never marry a stranger that only have met once and forced my my parents! Women are not like cattle to be sold at the highest bidder, this is the 21st century you know! I will not judge the way things are done ther, but I hope that I answer yoru question.
Good luck
2006-11-30 02:59:41 · answer #2 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine had an arranged marriage. He didn't meet his wife until a week before the wedding. They spent the first year or so getting to know each other and discovering what they were truly like. They've been married for about seven years now and have two kids. This is the happiest I've ever seen my friend and the two are deeply in love.
So, yes, it is possible to fall in love after getting married. I actually heard that arranged marriages end in divorce at a much lower rate than non-arranged marriages. Just relax and look forward to getting to know your future bride better.
2006-11-30 02:50:13 · answer #3 · answered by tipper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is more to marriage than just love.
If you trust your parents and are willing to work at your marriage then love is not that important to start off with.
Marriage between two people is always awkward to start off with, but if you are both willing to work at it and let things move along at their own pace, mutual respect and liking can develop into a bond that will last forever.
We all worry prior to marriage because it is a big step to take.
2006-12-03 23:22:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you will both grow to love each other as you become more intimate with each other. Give her time. Give yourself time. Try to relax. You have the rest of your lives to get to know and love each other. Maybe she is feeling nervous and shy as well, and her own feelings are getting lost in all the worry.
After the wedding, when everything calms down, things will get better. Good luck to you both, be happy.
2006-11-30 02:53:04 · answer #5 · answered by Firespider 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG they still make people do that in other countries. You should run. I'd hate to have to be married to someone I dont know. Of course she doesnt love and and you don't love her. That's sick and I feel sooooo bad for you
2006-11-30 03:08:15 · answer #6 · answered by Jersey Style 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her time. If she says she will be there for you then she will. Do your best to make her happy once you are married. Respect her and her opinions. She may be just as scared.
2006-11-30 04:33:35 · answer #7 · answered by roxanne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why you marry to somebody who doesn't love you I don't believe you will love somebody after you got married ....is not real you are pushing things ans it is not the way love works.......good luck for both of you do.......your are into a big problem...☺☻
2006-11-30 03:03:31 · answer #8 · answered by haki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't be attentive to, yet i does no longer presently desire to circulate into into yet another dating to clean up the difficulty of no intimacy. it is basically going to finally end up interior the comparable place. i might particularly basically wack off.
2016-12-10 19:05:16 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, don't do it. You'll be miserable.
2006-11-30 02:55:25 · answer #10 · answered by broj7400 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋