Is it right to have extra marital affair (cyber relations in particular)against wishes of the spouse?

Question

I have tried all ways and means to keep my husband happy. Alhtough I am the only child, I have gone againt my parents wishes, converted from my relegion for him, manage the house and his family inspite of a high presure job.. the list is endless. I have caught him cheating on me for the 6th time now. Should I divorce him??

Answer 1

yes - and I don't say this lightly I am a minister. First see a good lawyer, make sure your assets are protected. If there are children involved make sure you have considered all counseling--but usually men like him don't want counseling. Then move on.

Answer 2

Why are you still with him? That's the question you should be asking yourself at this point. Sounds like he has alienated you from your family, takes you for granted, and doesn't respect you at all. Yikes, I guess you have your reasons for staying this long. If you are self-sufficient and can be on your own, go. He sounds like a controlling creep. Two wrongs doesn't make a right, do not have an affair too...especially if kids are involved. Get away from him, get yourself into counseling and start over on your own life...when you have got all that underway...that may be a time (once the divorce is final) to begin another relationship. Trust me, you don't need to complicate matters any worse now with another man, ugh, one problem is enough!

Answer 3

Good God girl leave him. There are so many nice men out there, believe it or not, that would love to be with a women that is willing to stick by their man like you have done with the assshole you are with now. Plus you would be appreciated, loved and cherished for who you are and the kind of person you are. Are you of low self esteem? Even if you can't find a decent man after leaving your husband you still have yourself and your self worth and pride. Do you honestly think that the 6th time that you caught him means that he has only cheated six times. Plus isn't that enough that you know of them and thank your lucky stars that you don't know about the rest which would cause just that much more heartbreak for you. He won't stop and he isn't worth it. Take care of yourself now. You and only you. Leave him now!

Answer 4

Why are you still there? His actions show you no respect, can a marriage last without mutual respect? NO! If he's doing that online, then he will meet them if he has not already. My advice,,.
Next time marry a man instead of a boy.
A man wants a commited long term relationship ( marriage) and family with one woman, that makes him happy.
A boy still wants to play with all the toys.

Your "husband" is running through the toy store having a good time.

You should have left way before the 6th time.

Answer 5

Ok first of all, the very fact that you're still with him after the 6th b**ch slap on the face means that you must really love him to give him so many chances. Have you talked to him about how you feel? If you want to save your marriage, please do see some kind of marriage counsellor or some caring third party who your husband greatly respects to have a word with him, especially if he isn't listening to you. However, it does sound like he doesnt respect you at all. You must let this fact be known to him and remember to point out all the things you've sacrificed for him. Compare yourself with all those other girls he used to see in front of him - would they have had sacrificed for him the way you do for him? Make him see the error of his ways by yourself first, if it still doesnt work, get a third party's help. Try your utmost best to save your marriage until you know in your heart that you've reached the end of your tethers. How do you know? When you know you've exhausted all methods and know that if you leave him now, you'll never look back and leave with no regrets.
Best of luck!

Answer 6

Six times? Six times?
You've given him five more chances than I would have. Kick the bum to the curb.
Yes, you've invested time and effort into this marriage. But that is the past. Do not compound the waste of time in the past, by wasting your future on him. My parents divorced when they'd been married for 30 years and my mother died not long thereafter and all I could think was that she'd spent most of her short life being treated like crap -- she never had a chance to have a good life. Do not make this mistake. Please.

Answer 7

Of course its wrong! A cyber affair is a form of cheating ,u are giving to another your intimatancy.It sounds like he is pretty bad on trusting him not cheating over and over.Isnt it funny how many woman give all to a man cleaning,cooking,ect and there mistress does nothing at all ! Whos the fool here? Dont ever give your all to a man keep some for yourself,

Answer 8

You two have the potential to have something really great. Here is a man who is very alive sexually. But he is venting his sexual energy, his needs and desires in the wrong place. He's taking the easy way out, and I promise you that he's not satisfied with what he's doing. Find out if he loves you. Does he still claim to? Is he interested in making things work out? If so, there is hope to have a very on-fire relationship once again.
Tell him to take a sexual fast for one week. Tell him during this fast he must not look at, read, or think of anything sexual UNLESS it is you. He can have as much sex from you as he wants. Tell him to make you the source of his sexual venting. He need to relearn that you and you alone are his sexual vent. Don't compete. Eliminate. You can't live this way. It's either all you or no you. Work together to return the sexual focus back to you. Hope this helps!

Answer 9

i would have divorced him after the first time.

i only believe in divorce for three reasons, and cheating is at the top of the list.

Answer 10

It does not appear that he will ever change. He probably, based on the fact that you have bent over backwards for him throughout the relationship, that you will never leave. You should walk out immediately, and see if he gets the picture.